People are always telling me I’m welcome at theirs any time I want. I tell these people I can’t face leaving the house most days so they say OK I’ll come to you. In the 8 weeks since my mum died not one of them have visited even once. They tell me I need to get out and do stuff but that’s the last thing I want to do at the minute, I can’t carry on like nothing has happened. I get everyone has their own lives and are busy, I just feel like my life has stopped and although people send the occasional text they don’t really care or understand. I’ll admit I’m not handling my mums death well but she has been my absolute world for so long I’m struggling to accept reality and feel lost and lonely now shes really gone.
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I understand how you feel…I lost my mum in February and its as if time has no meaning. Nothing prepares you for the grieving that lies ahead…The first few weeks are busy then it all grinds to a halt. I have to go out food shopping and its usually early evening as its quieter. The world puts enough pressure on us so please try not to beat yourself up even more…We spent years with our loved ones so it’s to be expected it will take a long long time for most of us to reach any sort of acceptance…sending hugs.
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I totally get what your saying here @Butterfly1
There was times i didn’t want to leave the house. I know ppl ment well with sayin to go and do stuff.
I felt i was watchin other ppl goin on with the lives and all i could do was hide at home. I still now dont find it easy some days r ok and some r bad. Ive had to just take each one as it comes. I would say do whenever u feel u need to do. Ppl feel they need to help by telling you to go do things but its up to to you when u feel u would like to try this. I ended up goin out for a few hrs and coming home as didnt feel right.
We r all here for you to talk anytime.
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@ELLE66. I try to go in the mornings for the shopping before my babies nap, it’s also fairly quiet then. That’s the only time I leave the house really. I took them to the park last week tho and it was nice to see my eldest enjoying himself, my youngest is only 10 weeks. I get what you mean about it being all go one minute then suddenly everything’s over and your expected to move on after a week. Thankyou for your reply x
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@NicciC. Thankyou very much you totally get it! I just wish one of them would’ve followed through with all their words. Thankyou for the advice. I been to the park once with my babies and apart from shopping havnt left the house. It’s actually nice to be in the house alone with the babies
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I find your words very comforting…All we can do is take each day as it comes…For now just functioning and doing the essentials like eating, paying bills and shopping are really all I can cope with. There is enough pressure in this world without putting more on ourselves. I know what you mean about going out and having to come back…The positive thing is at least we got out of the house. Someone said the other day even if you manage to sit in a different room for a while its something.
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too often people are disappointing. let those people be for now. we cannot change them.
eight weeks is very early on.
you need a lot of time to rest and repair.
grief groups helped me because I could be my falling-apart-self with others falling apart. we understood each others pain …
I would keep using this board. I would do what my body wanted what mind could handle.
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