Was just reading on another forum about this and it made wonder what people do. I lost my husband unexpectedly 3 months ago. I wear my wedding ring, engagement ring and eternity ring. If I fill in a form for anything, I call myself Mrs. Some one said to me that you you are not legally married anymore so you should put yourself as single. But you surely wouldn’t revert to your maiden name? Anyway in my heart I am still married. My mum and my friend lost their husbands years ago. They still call themselves Mrs, use their married name and wear their rings. Just wondered if you all do the same?
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Lost my husband 12 months ago next week I still call my self Mrs and wear the rings, same as when I was previously divorced I kept my married name ! And Mrs but in that case ditched the ring ! X
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I know it’s different for me as being male. Nearly 11 weeks in i still wear my wedding ring on the same finger. I wear Sue’s wedding ring and eternity ring round a chain with a celtic cross, Sue got me when we first started going out(never taken off). I know legal i am not married but my head,heart and soul say i am.
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Four years on, I still refer to myself as Mrs and I wear my wedding ring. In my mind and heart I’m still married and always will be.
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I lost my husband 19 months ago and I use Mrs as I am not single. Unfortunately for us our legal marital status is widowed. The status of single is for someone who has never married. I could never revert to my maiden name as I chose to take my husband’s name and we had a loving marriage. I lost my wedding ring years ago but started to wear my husband’s ring on my ring finger. I have lost that too which has devastated me and filled me with guilt in equal measure. I now wear a ring with my husband’s ashes in and the natural finger to wear it is my ring finger.
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I hate that word widowed but that is true. I would never revert to my maiden name ever. I have worn my engagement ring since 1985 and my wedding ring since 1992. I couldn’t imagine not wearing them. I have ordered a ring with his ashes also. I have his wedding ring it is quite thick and heavy. Not sure what to do with that. As far as I am concerned in my mind I am married.
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My beautiful husband died 3 months ago unexpectedly and I am Mrs, I wear my rings on my ring finger and his on a chain around my neck - the chain with a heart on it that he also bought me. I am married and always will be to him. A friend pointed out to me that I was now legally single and she is lucky I still speak to her.
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My lovely husband collapsed and died in front of me with absolutely no warning, 3 months ago tomorrow , which is also our wedding annivwrsary. Someone said that to me, that I am now single. I feel the same way as you Tissue. Another thing said to me was you have to remember you are not the only one this has happened to. I could have punched them .
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Some people just are so awful - so sorry this has happened to us Cloudysky and tomorrow is going to be a tough day for you - I hope you have some family around you to support you tomorrow xx
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Such a sad day for you tomorrow. Really hope you manage to get through it ok. Some people say such horrible things don’t they without any compassion. Believe me 3 months into my grief journey if someone had said that to me I WOULD have punched them
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Tissue you can point out to your friend that she is completely wrong. The legal definition of a single person is someone who has never married. I can imagine how furious, not to mention very hurt, you felt over a remark like that.
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Some people just don’t seem to think before they speak - I don’t know how things like that even cross their minds. I know some people don’t know what to say to us, but I would rather they said nothing than spout a load of rubbish, and I will take great delight in pointing out the legal definition to her.
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Although I am a widower I will remain my wife’s husband for eternity upon my death I will be cremated and our ashes will be combined and scattered together.
Today was the first time I had to describe myself as a widower on of all things my tax return which asks for marital status and I had to use the word widower but as far as I am concerned I will always be married to Hazel who’s wedding ring is on a chain around my neck and the ring she gave me will stay on my finger until the day I leave this world.
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I will never change back to my maiden name. I will always be married. I will always wear my wedding ring. I married once and for all of my life, not just my husband’s. I will be married to him forever.
Love all.
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Thanks everyone. Yes tomorrow will be sad. I do have good family and friends am lucky there.
@JohnF , we have the same names as you! Thinking of you all xxxx
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Absolutely agree with everyone, still married and I never use the term widow, I hate it. What thoughtless comments some people come out with.
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Of course you are still married. I consider myself married or I actually don’t mind the word widow as at least it acknowledges my loss. I never consider myself as single and would have to work very hard not to scream at anyone who suggested that.
And yes I do still call myself Mrs and wear my rings. I also wear John’s wedding ring on the same finger as mine and have done since the day he died nearly 7 months ago
Ignore anyone who suggests you are single, should be Miss or not wear your rings, anyone who is that insensitive does not deserve to express an opinion to you
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I lost my dear husband over 13 months ago and I still call myself Mrs … I still wear my wedding, engagement and eternity ring. I am still his wife as far as I’m concerned. You do you. Whatever feels best. There really is no rule book or guidance anyone can give you on this subject lovely. I had my wedding ring and my husband’s melted down and put together by a jeweler so I wear both.
Sending love to you x
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In the UK legal status of a widow is single, the marriage is dissolved when one spouse dies, but I, like everyone else on here still would consider myself to be married. But like many who are divorced you would still call yourself Mrs as you don’t just become a Miss, it’s just legal status if there were only two options of single or married, unfortunately would be single. As much as I don’t like the word I would prefer to tick a widow box, definitely rather than single, even though I consider myself married; just my husband died.
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I am Mrs and wear my wedding ring. I didn’t divorce him he is just not here . I know I will never remarry.
There is no guide to rules of grief and widowhood. Do what is right for you. Wear the ring with pride.
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