There was a time when i used to look forward to spending time at home or doing stuff over weekend now I’m sitting here at home dreading how I’m going to get through the endless hours wishing my life away and not knowing what to do with myself i never thought id be looking forward to Monday to go to work for 2 days how do we all keep going
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Hi @Debrat
I know exactly how you feel, I used to love weekends… Andrew used to get an early finish on Friday and would make us a nice tea for when I got home from work. We used to do our errands, day out and house work on Saturday and Sunday we used to chill and watch crap on TV.
Now I force myself to go out to my mum’s, out for a coffee or see other family etc. It breaks it up. It’ll never be the same comming home alone. We just need to keep going and hopefully we will start to enjoy life again 
Have you anyone to meet to do something socially with , the anxiety can be daunting but it goes quite quickly once you get going.
Sending hugs 
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Debrat.had to start making myself go out .been better since getting another car and my daughter is persuading me to get out and about
Tuesday nights we go to a local biker cafe and saturday mornings.plus met up with some old friends hadnt seen for a long while and they are realy supportive with the way i feel about missing my beautiful gorgeous late wife sue
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I agree … weekends go so slow !! Horrible arent they ? I used to love weekends too … he usually went to a football game and then i would make us a curry Saturday night. I miss those cosy times … miss it all … just him being here :(.xx
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Me too, i think weekends are awful. Ive been going to the allotment, which Jim loved. I can spend 2 days working really hard, which i dont mind. I feel closer to Jim on the plots. On our allotment site you might not see a soul at the weekend 
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Do you do the same go on your husbands allotment ? You do feel close to them dont you ? I cried yesterday though , i missed him being there and telling me what to do …i could hear him saying debra lets do this or do that 
and i used his strimmer the one he bought only months before he left me - i felt so sad. Going through a sad period atm. Feeling like whats the point ? Hard without somebody to love you and have your back oh and my daughter flipping made me feel really good when she told me not to call it dads allotment but its mine now - not dads !! Fuming tbh and also she doesnt want me to talk about him cos it upsets her She just had a baby so maybe hormonal but Grrrhhh … honestly my kids have just been awful since their dad passed ! I think people are so mean these days ! Im sick of the human race tbh !! Very few worthwhile people anymore imo … i think only people who understand are people who lost their loved one … .xx
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I think you are right about the only people who understand 
I thought very hard about the allotments because Jim had 3 and I knew that was too much. Ive kept 2 of them and I’m enjoying the challenge. I didn’t do that much when he was here. They were his plots, and I was under instruction 
. I’m pleased with my efforts so far. The hardest bit was seeing someone new take over the old plot- few tears in the shed that day.
I think its up to you what you call the allotments. Mine are still often Jim’s
allotments! Keep at it, it makes you
happy. Thats really important these
days.
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Oh i remember you saying and i was same - wasnt sure whether to keep it on either - but i been enjoying it and gets you out of the house doesnt it ? And same i wasnt that involved either it was his domain really but im glad i did it for him, im his memory - i miss him every day so much … i loved him so much - he made me so happy and i realise that now i am so miserable … he always laughed about stuff - we had such a laugh together - i miss those laughs and his love Xx
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Agree with all that and made worse by bank holidays Deb
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Oh yeh bank holidays are just excruciating @ god i dread it everytime they say there’s gonna be one ! Good news is that there isnt another until august now thank god !! xx
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I think with kids they dont understand what were going through, they havent experienced the loss. They are young just starting out in their life and like most young people today they cant empathise or relate to it. So they prefer to not discuss it.
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I hate everyday as it seems pointless and no purpose anymore. Life has changed so much in the 7 weeks since he passed. Everyone has a life except for me, im stuck in a nightmare unable to move forward. Hugs to all
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Deb5 totaly agree on bank holidays.i try to tell myself that sue wouldnt me to be misarble and start getting out and about again.local biker cafe me and my daughter go to is doing me good
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Probably and i dont wanna discuss it all in length either ! But to say i cant mention my husband/her dad is just frankly bloody ridiculous! Cant say “dads allotment” sod that i will ! And she can like it or lump it cant she !!
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Thsts good you have the bikers cafe that you enjoy martyn xx
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My husband has been gone since October 2023…I used to LOVE weekend and our sweet little life. Now…I get so anxious when Friday hits…I do try to get out of the house but I can’t wait to come home…and then I just sit and stare.
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Hi @Cat67
It’s awful isn’t it. It’s hard to know what to do for the best. I’ve joined lots of different sites on Facebook around grief, so hopefully things start to get easier. It’s just every single thing brings my mind back to my Andrew. I got a new mattress topper and bedding etc he would have loved that, he cant even try it out! Xx
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hello i read your post with interest i lost my davy five weeks ago and my grandaughter and her baby live with me my point is its not people being awful its just us because we are hurting so bad we dont have any tolerance to people because of the way we are feeling but if that had been before our loss we would have just shrugged thats just my view
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Yeh maybe you’re partly right … but i havent been treated with a lot of empathy by family apart from my lovely mum who has listened to me cry many times ! But suppose my kids are grieving for their dad too ?
You be happy to know ive come through that sad period … feeling more positive … hopefully ! It’s a rollercoaster is this … its been like this since i lost him - up and down like a yo yo !! Its been so hard without him - as my bereavment counsellor said he was my rock and my protector !! im less up and down than i was - but thanks for caring … im ok atm… got some lovely friends xx
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