Weird

Never celebrated mother’s day without my husband before since becoming a mum in 1987

It just feels so weird

Sending love to everyone
Romy xxxxx

Hi Romy, just wondering how you are getting through today. I hope there’s not been too many painful, sad or difficult moments. Just so different now. Is your Mam keeping well…with my kindest wishes, x

Romy, Alan worked shifts for most of our married life so we very rarely were together on mother’s day, fir you it was significant and I truly do send you blessings for today. Alan never believed in sending cards which , in hindsight has been a blessing for me… but I truly do feel your upset and pain at this time. Over a couple more first anniversaries to cope with then it will be anniversaries of anniversaries. Amd they will never go away
Blessings Romy for strength
Jen ☆`

Hi Rainbow

Just very weird without him here . The girls feel it too . Two of the three more down in the dumps than usual . So difficult because I can’t do anything to make it better . It’s hard seeing your children cry no matter that they are pretty grown up now

My mum is better than she was . Thank you for asking . We all like being together but my husband’s sisters and father are not really bothering with us . They have been very much lacking in compassion since my husband has died which is very difficult to deal with . So that is like an additional loss . My husband’s death has revealed how tenuous the links were between his family and our family and now he has gone they have revealed their true colours

I hope you are keeping as ok as possible
I haven’t been on here much this week because we have been finalising the probate application

Sending you lots of love
Romy xxxxx

Hi Jen

Haven’t been on here much recently
Been finalising probate application

The girls always liked making a fuss on mother’s day , Father’s Day , any day to celebrate and all get together really

We are still doing it but all very conscious that that our main man is missing
We are doing our best but it is hard going without him and with three daughters grieving as well as myself it’s virtually guaranteed that one of us will be struggling more than usual and more than the others nearly every day . We seem to be taking it in turns to be visibly upset on occasions as well as being sad most all of the time

Anyway we are all doing our best
Hope you have had an ok day

Sending big hugs
Romy xxxxx

Romy . I woke on mothers day and was struck by the absence of flowers
I thought it eas 43 years since that had happened . I have been going through madness and have spent lots of time on pscychic lines just for a voice . Toyal insanity

Dear Mac

Grief does make you feel crazy …and do stuff you wouldn’t normally do

I have taken to hugging a particular tree in the field where I walk my dogs every day . I tell everyone it is channeling my husband’s spirit and I don’t care if people roll their eyes at me in disbelief because hugging that tree helps me when I am upset ! And no I am not crazy . So I totally get it when you say that you feel like you are going mad

Do whatever helps to get you through the day . I always have stuff to do morning , noon and night …whether it’s housework, doing stuff with animals …we have horses and dogs , going to work …we have a family business , food shopping …three daughters , their boyfriends and my mum …or just even watching something particular on the telly of an evening

I am worse when there is nothing to distract me

How are you feeling today ?
Will you be doing stuff today or seeing anyone ?

My husband’s death was very sudden . So sometimes I think I am still in shock . It was last summer . When I am having a bad day I ask him to give me the strength to carry on and something will usually happen to keep me going . A song on the radio, or some words in a book . Or something …

Anyway I am rambling now
Don’t know how I am getting through the days but it’s 36 weeks now and I’m still here somehow and you will do it too

Keep posting on this forum
Everyone is lovely
I will look out for you
We all help each other
Sending you a hug
Romy xxxxx