What to buy a grieving person?

Hi all,

Do any of you guys know of any really nice gifts / presents that you can get somebody who’s grieving?

I want to do something really nice for a friend of mine who’s lost someone. I can’t really be there for them as much I’d like and I just like to let them know they’re in my thoughts.


What about a tree or rose bush to commemorate their loved one?
Either for their garden or in The Woodland Trust?


Hi Vic

What I remember from when my Mum passed away was the unexpected things that people did. Flowers arrived of course and every bunch was welcomed and admired in the house. A neighbour knocked on the door with some cup cakes her daughters had made for me. They were delicious and as I wasn’t eating much were just what was needed. Arranging for something your friend likes to be sent to them is also good, food, drink, magazine subscription. Getting something nice through the post is always good and especially after all the sadness from receiving letters and cards after a bereavement.

Your friend will know you are thinking of them whatever you do. You sound lovely and a super friend to have.


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I agree with a tree or something that you like but would say no it’s to expensive otherwise what about a card saying I will call and see you on such a day every month for a chat and a drink. It would be thier time to talk about anything but it’s ‘time’ that you are giving. I have a neighbor who did this for me, nothing formal but she gave me time. When it stopped I missed it and still do but then I know someone cared. S



Agree with Susie, something like a meet up to look forward to is always good. It is rare to find the time to just sit and chat so that with or without a coffee or drink would be great.

I have a friend who has sent me texts every day nearly since my Mum passed away. Sometimes just how am I doing that day or saying shall we meet up. I look forward to them and the phone calls when we set the world to rights. She has just had some very bad news about her husband so the roles are reversed. I am now the one keeping in touch with her and I hope giving her the support she needs.


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Thanks for all your lovely advise guys! :slight_smile:

For some extra detail, my friend is an old uni friend of mine. He’s in Edinburgh and I’m in Cardiff and it’s just not practical to be there for him physically - hence why i wanted to send him a gift :frowning:

Hi Vic,
Soups, anything that can be cooked easily. Cakes crisps, comfort food. I found that particularly helpful after I lost my wife and I was surviving on 4 fish fingers a day.
Take care

Hi all,

Some good news I’m going up to see my friend at the end of the month - I thought he’s want space to himself, but when I asked if he’d be ok with me visiting for a few days he was very enthusiastic. Can’t wait to see him now

Also, one of my friends suggested to name a star as a way to remember their lost friend, so I can still give a really nice gift to them :slight_smile:

Hi Vic,

What a lovely idea. Glad to hear you are going to see your friend as well. Edinburgh should be lively this month with the festival going on so should be enjoyable.


I’ve received plants & flowers but the thing that I haven’t had is visits. I have been, & still am enduring my sorrow alone. The greatest things for me would be time, a listening ear, kind words & hugs. Anplant can’t talk or listen unless of course you are Prince Charles.

I was fortunate (if you can call it that) in that I received many cards, flowers, plants and visits but the one thing that really stands out is a rose bush called ‘Remember Me’. It’s beautiful and I got enormous pleasure and comfort when it bloomed this year. The first rose opened on the first anniversary of my husband’s death - wow! Couldn’t believe it.
Another thing I had given me was a framed Pooh Bear quote, perhaps perfect for your friend - it goes like this:

If ever there is a tomorrow when we’re not together…
There is something you must always remember.

You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think.

But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart…

You sound like a very good friend to have Vic. Much love xx

How how beautiful, just read your post and it’s set me up for the week. The rose, just the best thing. And Poo bear always says the right thing. Take care and keep smiling because we all are stronger then we think.

Hey Vic, that’s good news. Let us know how you get on visiting and how your friend is coping. Sending love both to you and friend xx