Hi everyone
A dear friends husband passed away a few weeks ago.
I am trying my best to comfort and support her, my darling husband passed away very suddenly 18 months ago so I understand exactly how she is feeling.
She asks me so many questions that I wish I had the answer to for both of us
She asks how long this unbelievable pain goes on for, I tell her that’s its different for each of us and to try not to compare to others
Then she asks how I am doing now… How can I tell her that I feel worse as time goes on and miss my loving husband more every day… Does she really need to hear that… It may be different for her.
I just distract her from the question by turning it back and telling her that she can talk to me about anything day or night
I know myself that the best thing anyone can do for us is… Just listen
How I wish as I do a million times I could speak to my darling husband, he always knew what to say to comfort people
He had a very calming and reassuring way about him.
Oh how I miss him, he is my first and last thought everyday
My heart goes out to my dear friend, she lives abroad (where we used to live) so I can’t comfort her in person which makes me very sad.
Thank you to anyone who reads
Take care and a big hug to everyone
Christine xx
Dear Christine
I feel the same. The pain of each day cuts as deep as the first day I was told my husband had died. I am comforting my brother-in-law who lost his husband unexpectedly in August. We have honest conversations but I can understand you holding back in answering your friend because as you say people are very different.
Sheila xx
Hi Sheila
Yes it’s all very difficult, when you are feeling the same pain the last thing I want to do is cause my friend to feel worse.
I guess if I could give her a hug at the same time I’d feel able to have a more honest conversation with her, but by face time etc it’s more difficult.
I just hope and pray that she finds the path easier and if not as time goes on these honest conversations will just evolve and she will understand why I’ve held back
That’s my thinking right now anyhow
Thank you for your input
Christine xx