Some days I can fill with visitors, other days I sit on my own, trawling the internet for hope, comfort and inspiration to keep on keeping on. I came across a site about grief and gratitude. At first I thought, for f***’s sake, what the f*** have I got to be grateful for? But I was bored, so I read it anyway. Much to my surprise, it did make a bit of sense.
Think of five things you are grateful for, it said.
So I did,
My children, one of whom is disabled, and the reason I have to get my sorry arse out of bed in the morning. The other one, who has been a huge support. He doesn’t live with me, but comes and looks after his sister now and then, so that I can catch up on sleep now and then.
2, The fact that I was lucky enough to have two wonderful husbands. Even though I lost them both too soon.
I live in a nice house, it is too soon to be certain, but I think I can afford to stay here, I hope so because it is adapted for my daughter’s needs.
I have a small but precious number of friends and relatives that help and support me when I really need help.
This site, where I can find other people who hear me.
For the last few weeks, since he died, I have been consumed by what I have lost. Now I am really trying to concentrate on what I have.
Sometimes we find things we think are nonsense and not for us , but when we try them it is a revelation.
I’m glad this is working for you @Willow112 and I thinks it’s a good way to try shift our mindset. Easier said than done in the early throws of grief but I’m sure that practice makes perfect.
Hope today is an ok day for you xx
I am ashamed to admit that when my husband died 6 weeks ago, I had not driven a car for almost 16 years, nor had I used a cash machine or debit card. Needless to say, all the even more complicated stuff is a mystery to me. I used to do it, but he actually enjoyed finances, spreadsheets, etc. So, being a bit lazy and easily confused, I sat back and let him. How I regret that now.
Anyway, this morning I drove to a supermarket, got some cash out of the machine, shopped and paid for it with a debit card on the touch machine thingy.
Pathetic, I know, but I feel pleased with myself. Even though I was breathless, had a dry mouth and was shaking when I got home. 🫨
Things we took for granted, little things , but still huge mountains for us all now as we walk this life on our own, stood and ironed the other day, and just waiting for Sue to tell me the way it should be done, brought tears and eventually a smile and a quick word with her …. Sue was disabled so I did most things as she could no longer do them, but she still had her input as to how I did them …… missing her so much
🫨