When will it get better

Hi, my husband died 9 months ago from lung cancer/covid, it was only 3 months from diagnosis to his death. I still can’t get my head around what happened, I pretend to the outside world that I’m coping, but I am heartbroken, there is never a day goes by when I don’t break down and cry. We had both just retired, I feel angry and cheated that we don’t have the future together that I thought we would. I can’t even speak his name without crying, and when I remember our happy times together I just get upset yearning for those days again. When will it get better.


I’m not sure it ever gets better but we find a way of coping, somehow. Exactly 1 yr ago tomorrow I was told my husband was terminal with MND and probably had 2 yrs to live. He passed away exactly 2 months later. I’ve been housebound after having major surgery 5 weeks ago and was in floods of tears on phone to my daughter wee while ago. She seems to forget that I’m still grieving but with everything rlsr I just feel overwhelmed at times. I also lost my father in June 2030 and had to organise 2 funerals in 6 mths. I keep hoping that one day soon my tears will stop , at least when others are around. I have a playlist of music from songs on this site which I feel helps. Be kind to yourself :smiling_face_with_three_hearts: