Where does my grief 'fit'?

I’m really struggling to cope with the loss of my friend, he was diagnosed with stomach cancer and 3.5 weeks later he is gone… he was my ‘work hubby’, my steadying influence, the one who would talk me down from stressful situations. I don’t know who or how to be without him. But then I know that he was only my friend and my grief seems to diminish against what his partner must be feeling, how he must be hurting. Planning for the funeral next week and still can’t quite believe it’s real. Just needed to reach out somewhere to get a virtual hug.


Hello @roncoldev3103,

I’m Seaneen, and I’m glad you’ve found our community, but so sorry for the loss of your friend that brings you here.

Your own grief doesn’t take away or diminish anyone else’s, and you matter too.

I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but you might also find these Sue Ryder resources helpful to you as you cope with the death of your friend.

We have also just launched our Grief Kind Spaces.

Our Grief Kind Spaces are weekly, in-person drop-in sessions held in the local community and run by trained volunteers. The sessions provide a safe, informal and supportive place for people to come together and share their experiences of grief, helping attendees to feel heard and less alone.

If you’re not in an area with a Grief Kind space, or are looking for a different kind of support, you may wish to visit the AtALoss website . It is a directory of bereavement support and will show you what is available in your area. If you click this link then select your region , you may be able to find something near you.

Take good care - you are not alone.


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Big hugs from me to you.

My work hubby my best friend for 20 years died suddenly.

I thought having the funeral yesterday would bring me closure and stop crying but it hasnt. I speak to him everyday about everything. Everyday is a struggle and i cry everyday.

I send you love and light xxx