Which way to turn

I lost my dad on Thursday to complications arising from Parkinson’s disease. I had to stamp my feet and spit my dummy out so much to get the hospital staff to listen when I said he was deteriorating and they said he was fine. But it was too late when they finally sat up and heard me. I have brought my mam to stop with me as she has never been alone before. I never knew grief could be a physical pain as well as emotional. I just feel like my legs are going to buckle anytime and the though of not seeing him anymore is just overwhelming

Hi becks,

Sorry to hear about your dad. You have lots to do over the next few weeks but just to let you know that you are not alone. The pain for me 15 weeks after losing my mum suddenly is still physical and raw. I cannot believe I havent spoken to her or seen her for all this time and yes it’s completely overwhelming
I wish I could tell you it gets better but I haven’t been the same person since the day she died.
Cheryl x

Thank you Cheryl I hope it gets better for you soon and I agree I think I’ll never be the same again my dad was my hero but I take comfort knowing that they are other people out there who feel the same x

I have felt alot of comfort from seeing mot only lots of people going through the same thing but also comparing how people are coping. I’m still crying 20 times a day but I have come to accept this and dont even try holding back the tears anymore. I just make sure I carry tissues everywhere I go.

Hi Becks

During the first few weeks of my grieving when I was out I would have to walk so slow, and my legs, they felt hollow, empty. I didn’t know if they would give way. I too also experience what feels like an open wound in my chest and when the waves of grief come it feels raw and stings. I drown in the pain and my mind switches off. I never realised how physical grief was either.

It will be 10 weeks for me tomorrow since my Dad died. It just a heartbreak.

Sending love and prayers for a better day x

Hi Lucy jane,

Your right,I used to drag my legs along.i barely had the energy to move.
Even though it feels like I’m being told of mums death every day when I wake up, I have noticed that at 15 weeks, I’ve got more energy, have started running again and have got some appetite back.
Its amazing how the human body digests bad news,deals with it and eventually recovers. Maybe not to the same standard as before but vastly improved.
I never thought I would get to this stage and although I still break down and cry numerous times a day, I am healing slowly.
Cheryl x