I lost my dad very suddenly at the beginning of this year, it was such a shock. He was my best friend. I have siblings, family and close friends around me to suupport me but i am struggling to open up to anyone I feel soo alone and i don’t know why when i know they would be thier for me. Dose anyone else feel this way?
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Hi @Zena88 I think this is quite normal when you’re grieving. Society has forced us to feel that sharing our pain caused by death is somehow a burden to others. Grief conversations can be awkward and uncomfortable so we all clam up and put on a mask. Of course, this isn’t what we should do because actually sharing our feelings is exactly what helps us to process our emotions. This is why this forum is so helpful, you can share your thoughts on here and people will read and respond with compassion and understanding. However, maybe you could try to open up a little to your support network of family and friends? It sounds like they would listen and give you empathy. Don’t be worried about imposing on them, you’ll soon see if they respond with compassion. Best wishes xx
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I think you are trying to protect yourself from your emotional thoughts. But that only prolongs it.
I wouldnt be surprised that your family and friends talk to each other along the lines of “Why wont Zena talk to us, because we all want to help”.
Then nobody wins, just give it a go, sit with them, with a coffee and bun. You will soon get into practice.
Many of us worry more about boring them with our troubles, but everyone turns out to be kind and patient, often prompting us with questions.
Don’t forget they need to do a bit of grieving as well, its a team effort.!
I remember one friend asked me : What was my favourite memory of Penny? Then sat happily whilst I told her ,(took about 15 minutes)
A trouble shared is a trouble halved.
Give it a go. You might be surprised.
AND: Dont forget hugs, hugs and more hugs!
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Totally agree with Turkey.Dont prolong it.Talk about how you feel.
I am sure I have noted many people with stories about my mum. People don’t know what to say sometimes so it’s difficult for them. Share photos also as that leads to opening up and talking about memories.
Thinking of you
Deborah x