Why did she die so young

I guess everyone’s relieved for Christmas to be over, but the truth is there’s always something else, my mom was 64 when she died, her birthday would of been in February, :pensive::pleading_face:, then in march there’s yet another mother’s Day, which hits me twofold, because not only do I have the death of my mom, but also, the death of my only child, between the 2 I feel like I wanna find a quiet corner somewhere & just shut myself away & forget the world exists.
The issue that’s playing on my mind a lot lately, when other friends & family talk about their parents in their 70s/80s, I’m starting to feel, “why didn’t my mom live to that kind of age?” “Why didn’t my mom live to see 70?” I’ve even googled the statistics on living to 70s/80s, trying to make sense of this, I know realistically we don’t get to choose, know matter how healthy we are about food, exercise, limiting stress, lifestyle choices, etc, fate decides when our time is up through whatever circumstances, & one of the parts of this is that fate decides what age people are at that time, but I can’t help feeling mom went too soon, :pensive::worried::sob:, it’ll be 3 years this April since she passed, she never met my boyfriend who is an amazing, kindhearted man, she never got to see how happy he makes me, or share in any of those memories with us, or being there to support me through hospital appointments last year, I miss her badly.


Hi @Pandaprincess ,

Thank you so much for sharing this with the community :blue_heart: I’m sure someone will be along to offer their support, but I just wanted to let you know that you have been heard and you are not alone.

Take good care,

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I know what you mean…my mam was 66 and she only passed 3 months ago I’m finding it so hard…maybe try and get some bereavement counselling to try and help you

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Im so sorry for your losses @Pandaprincess . My Dad passed unexpectedly at 64 and i was so full of sorrow for all the things he’d never see/do. He’d only only recently retired, he’d just ordered his first ever brand new car which he never got to see, he’d never get to walk me down the aisle etc. We assume we’ll live to a ripe old age, but to be honest with you, my Mum lived to 87 and the last few years the quality of her life had deteriorated so much, it was heartbreaking to witness. None of us know when our time will be, which is why its so important to not put important stuff off assuming we’ll be around in 10/20 years, and to value the precious things like family and friends every single day - im not prepared to work all hours and get so stressed for the sake of a job anymore. Lifes too short! :heart:


@Ally6 very wise words. We don’t know what is round the corner so it’s important to try and live our best lives, despite our grief. @Pandaprincess I understand your feelings completely, but the ‘what ifs’ and regrets will just make you feel sadder because the past can’t be changed. All we can do is to keep moving forward, taking our love with us. Best wishes xx

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