Why do people offer help

Why do people offer help and make arrangements only to not keep to their promises. My sons last week promised to come and cut my grass and help clear up the garden this Saturday I haven’t heard a word from them to say yes they were coming or no they couldn’t I am always every day walk my youngest sons dog and pick my middle sons daughter up from school twice a week and babysit whenever they want why do they think its a.right to let me down. I find it hard to garden as I have CMT and do try as I used to love gardening and find it frustrating that I can’t do what I used to do. I know my children work and have their own lives but why offer to help if they don’t want to their dad would be very disappointed in them. Has anyone else had this happen to them I am very upset with them.

Hi Jen

Sorry to hear this has happened to you and your loss.
I can relate to what has happened to you. I had a blazing row with my son the other week. It was a bad day for me and I was struggling cleaning my house, he plonked himself on a chair and promptly told me he hadn’t come round to help me clean! I saw red, another day it may not have bothered me. Like you I help out when I can. So his comment cut deep.
Sometimes I forget that my kids are struggling too with the loss of their Dad, and they will sometimes do and say the wrong thing. This grief journey brings out more than just being sad. I would explain it to your son, he may well have not realised how it upset you.
Take care x

Hi Vic 3 Sorry for your loss and you have had trouble too. I don’t think my sons fully realise how I miss their dad and 17months down the line it still hurts and won’t get over his sudden death . They miss him but they don’t talk about him its only me that does. I can see like you that I will have a blazing row with them soon as I can’t keep it bottled up. I have to go out for 7am this morning to babysit for my daughter who does nothing for me. Sorry for the rant . Take care x

Hi Jen

You can rant anytime.

Take care x

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