Why do we have to suffer this torture

I wish someone could help me….
I can’t stand this pain and loneliness anymore….I just want to leave this life now and be free of the mental torture I’m going through.
I see no end to this empty feeling and it scares me so much.


@AlysonandSteve - please stay with us - you are loved very much. If you are feeling very, very low - please contact a friend or The Samaritans to talk things through. Some days are brutally hard, I know. All I can offer is my friendship and support here and to say that, in time, I promise you, it will get easier to bear. My husband Tom died 20 months ago today. I did not think I could survive it. Each day, some fresh hell of admin and the grief was over-powering. And each day, I dragged myself downstairs to get through one thing on my list. The pain lessened, slowly, slowly and suddenly, I started noticing things again - flowers, the sun, the sound of laughter - and realised it was my own. My friend, hold tight today, speak with someone, go out for a walk, catch your breath. If the dark thoughts are really bad - please call The Samaritans - they are there 24/7 xxx


@AlysonandSteve it is hard and some days are harder than other days. I really miss my husband so much and wish I could go back in time and do things differently as didn’t notice my husband losing weight. I felt like you so many times and in the end I went to see a mental health nurse at my doctor’s. I have been diagnosed with PTSD and have had some trauma therapy. I also defeated and now on a mild antidepressant something I really didn’t want to take. You really shouldn’t be going through this on your own. Big hugs xx


I know exactly what you mean.I am so sorry you feel this way.I have thought about ending it all to be with my husband,but I have a 45 year old autistic son.God knows how he will cope.He struggles with losing his dad.Please phone Samaritans or a bereavement line.You can tell this community your thoughts and we will understand xxx

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@AlysonandSteve please reach out for help to the Samaritans or your gp . It is a very difficult time for you but know we are all here for you on this site .

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Thank you all so much for taking the time to get back to me.
I have this feeling in the pit of my stomach all the time and I can’t stop it xxx


Its very painful for you right now.l get that.but all l can say is those intense feelings get better & you move through it.the grief comes in waves.Have you considered Councelling or telling a good friend how you are feeling?.I found Councelling really helped me getting all those emotions out.Please keep posting on here however you feel.as we all are either going through it or have been where you are now.Sending you love & light X

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Alison. Please don’t give up. It will get easier to bear in time. But you do need help to get there. Like many of us, it was a sudden shock for you, and like many others I have been diagnosed with PTSD because of it. It sounds like you may have that too. Please continue to use this group. We are all here to support you. Try to not think any further ahead than the next cup of tea. There is strength here for you as we all totally understand how you feel. Sue Ryder have counsellors I think, and your Dr maybe could help? I am 6 months on and I promise you, it does slowly ease and become more bearable. We loved and so the loss will hurt. But together we will get through it.


Sue ryder do have counsellors and you can access it via grief kind to do online xx

Oh, I’m so sad for you. I have the same feelings, i just want to go and be with my darling boy. His funeral was yesterday. I have another son I can’t leave him by committing suicide.
I pray you find some peace and strength from each other. I have no one now, just memories . Please be kind to each other. Im here if you want to chat x

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Aw …its so very raw just after the funeral. Take strength from your son and know he needs you too right now xxx

Thank you for your reply. So nice that someone cares

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No problem. look after yourself xx