Counselors are trained to focus entirely on you. A friend can but then they are weary of your trouble. A counselor is paid to listen and advise and to sympathize. For those struggling, I highly recommend it because generally you will find an attentive ear. When we hurt, we need full attention and they are educated in providing this.
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I think I need to get the courage up to ask for counselling. I definitely need something. Thanks x
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Hi,
To be honest, I’ve been through a lot of different counseling & therapy, & I would say, if anyone feels it’s what they need, then take the Nike approach, “just do it!” Though sometimes I think it depends on the counselor, I have occasionally found one I didn’t get on so well with, but I found others that were very helpful & supportive, so sometimes it’s a good idea to shop round, maybe ask friends or family if they can recommend anyone.
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Can anyone give advice on where to look for counseling? How long are waiting lists on NHS, or is a charity better? My dad passed in November to cancer 4 months after diagnoses, and it was traumatic. Some days I’m okay, others very much the opposite 
. He passed at a hospice, and I think they provide counseling but I’ve been back once to drop off money from his funeral collection and it was extremely difficult, I don’t want to go back. He was in agony there. I don’t know where to turn. X
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I am in the US. the Jewish Community Ctr. had low cost counseling as do universities that offer education in psychology. some clinics, I found them online, offer low cost with grad students. any PhD psych will offer services with higher prices.
I have had only one counselor I did not get along with. most were terrific.
I lost both parents in the last 3 months. I’m accessing counselling through the hospice as it’s tailored for your type of bereavement (loss through illness). NHS waiting lists are very long in most areas.
Cruise bereavement also offer counselling as do Sue Ryder.
It’s worth a try. I choose the hospice as I wanted a connection back to mum.
I understand about not wanting to go back. They can do it via telephone, video or face to face.
I’m sorry for your loss. Grief sucks. Talking helps. Take care. R
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Hi @Peppermint,
Yes NHS waiting times are horrendous, but as RobBeat08 said, there is cruse, & sue Ryder, I don’t know which area you’re in, I’m in Bath & in B&nes we also have a service called talking therapies, maybe ask citizens advice what services are available in your area. Also, depending on the cause of death, sometimes certain charities run counselling, or support groups, like Macmillan, Dorothy house, mind, etc. hope this helps.
After my partner passed away I tried to take my own life and ended up in the mental health hospital and they said that I need counselling to help me with the grief and loneliness and because I don’t have any friends or family they thought it would be a good idea but I was very sceptical about it it’s now been nearly four months since Ann passed away and I’ve just had my third counselling session and I am still struggling with the grief but I am managing a lot better thanks to the councillor I never thought it would help talking to a stranger but I’m so glad I was persuaded to get counselling and I know the NHS is overwhelmed with calls for help but it’s worth the wait I now have a more positive attitude to the future without Ann and I know it’s going to take a long time to cope without her but I’m taking it one day at a time
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Hi @Peppermint
I’ve been receiving counselling free from work, but I can’t help feeling its been an exercise to get me back to work quicker than when I’m actually ready. I researched cruse, a bereavement charity, and they don’t offer their services until after 2 months of the bereavement. I’m presuming other charity’s are the same. Sue Ryder also do bereavement counselling. I think you may find that there’s a waiting list but once you’re on it at least it would relieve the pressure slightly
Hope this helps 
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My line manager who is really supportive is going to refer me to the wellbeing hub where I work to see what support they can provide or recommend. Feel I need something x
Thats good news, hopefully you’ll get some counselling
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this is terrific because I can promise you, your partner does not want to see your life end that way. we will all meet their fate, theirs just came sooner. so, their wisdom would urge us to get out of life what we can, while we are still here. hard but true. 
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Hi @berit
Sorry for your loss 
I’m so happy you’ve found this site and hope it brings you some comfort
Take care
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I am on a waiting list for counselling from Cruse. They won’t put you on the list until you have been bereaved for 6 months. I therefore went on the list in Feb and there is at least a 20 week waiting list, so i won’t see anyone until almost a year since my brother died.
Hiya I’ve read somewhere it’s 2 months before you can go on a list, hope this helps
Lavender4
I was told that there was a long wait for grief counselling but I’ve been accepted by springtolife.org and I’ve had three sessions already I had my doubt’s about having counselling it’s been nearly three months since my partner passed away and I was struggling but with counselling I am coping a bit better I hope you can get counselling some time soon take care
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