I lost my husband, two months ago, very suddenly. I seem to be really struggling all of a sudden. This is not just with the loss of us but with the loss of him, if that makes sense. I am so overwhelmingly sad as things just appear very final to me now. He is no more and I just can’t get past this. Has anyone else found they feel like this after seemingly feeling in control of things?
I thought I was sort of coping but now I’m not so sure I am at all. Maybe it’s connected with my daughter going home, trying to return to work or our up coming wedding anniversary? I just don’t understand the change.
Oh @starbright I feel just the same.
2 months ago today I lost the love of my life, and the pain seems to get worse and worse. I’m sure I’m getting more tearful and I’m so empty i just cant see an end to this pain. I too don’t seem able to get past this loss.
I’ve been staying with my sister for a while and I think knowing I’m going home on Saturday is weighing heavy on my mind. The quietness and loneliness are going to come hard again, but I don’t think that will ever go away. Even in company I feel alone.
Will this pain ever go away
Sorry for your loss. The numbness is wearing off and reality is setting in, so you’re starting to feel the pain. It’s a rollercoaster ride of ups and downs. I’m a little over 5 months and that grief wave will hit me out of nowhere. This site helped me and when you want to cry…go on and cry. Don’t hold your emotions inside. Talking about how you’re feeling will help you get through this. Reach out anytime, we are all in this same terrible journey.
Thank you both for replying @Liro and @Marla56. It sounds like we are all feeling very similar waves of grief and it is comforting to know I’m not alone. My daughter left today (the last bit of my protection bubble) and I am very much alone now. I have been crying on and off these last few days, probably because I knew this was coming. I just can’t fathom a life like this. Like you say even if I make plans and organise things to have people around me, (not always possible), I still feel alone. Hugs to you both on this horrible ride with me xx
Hi @starbright we do seem to be going through this together, same timeline. And @Marla56 thankyou.
Even at my sisters I’m ok one minute and in tears the next. She lives by the coast so I try and have a seaside walk every day, most of the walk is spent in tears as I talk to Roger, desperately wishing he was here with me. I’m going home on Saturday and I’m dreading it, the house will be so empty, so quiet, and he won’t be there. I’m really finding it hard to accept he won’t be back. And although I promised him I’d be ok, I dont know how I’m going to do it. The tears seem never ending, where do they all come from?
I’m looking after my Grandaughters dog for the first week home so maybe that will help, at least be a bit of a distraction.
Take care
Big hugs
Liz
I lost my husband almost 3 months ago. I feel the same im crying a lot of the time, and i cant stand the thought of being without my lovely husband of 53 years marriage. People keep saying im doing really well but they dont realise how extremely sad im feeling, im not doing well and im feeling worse as time goes on maybe for years. I keep getting flashbacks of his last day and also of the times we were on holiday but its like a knife to.my heart. Also they say think of the happy times but they hurt!! My son who’s 34 lives with me and doesnt understand i still need to cry. Its all a nightmare!!
so.many ups and downs xx