Why

Last year was the year from hell, only just come back from a lovely holiday to goal been back about 3 days when we received phone call from MK hospital that our eldest daughter was there and not doing so good, she was a troubled soul had 2 children who lived with there father 15/17 she had cancer in the breast,bone, liver, and a heroine addict, after about 6 weeks in hospital we took her home to be with the family and her sisters 2 she passed august bank holiday, so we tried to get on with our lives we moved to sandy as the memories were to painful found a lovely house and the wife started improving it so far so good, then she started to wobbly spilling things as getting unsteady falling of the sofa, saw gp and was admitted to Watford for test, there found brain and lung cancer, well that did it that was oct we finished the house the way she wanted it, and ed passed Dec 28 in Bedford hospital, since then we are all totally lost, grandchildren keep me going most of the time and my 2 daughters but don’t really won’t to burden them to much as there going though a bad time as well as trying to keep an eye on me, that’s were I’m at now, Micky.

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Micky, I’m so sorry to read of your devastating losses in such a short space of time. I lost my Husband last year and the passage of time brings added challenges doesn’t it. I was so distressed I left our home to stay with family some 25 miles away. This has had its pros and cons as I can imagine you too have experienced. The secondary losses such as our identity, purpose in life and dreams etc just keep coming don’t they. It’s difficult when you are trying not to burden others I know, as bottling things up just adds to the despair. I’m struggling with my loss so I’m sorry I can’t be more positive but would like to say try not to look too much into the future, it’s too much to cope with. Warmest regards.

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Hi Tina thanks and sorry for your loss, yes I know what you mean I did the same stayed with my daughter for a while,but that doesn’t really help as she has her own life and family to see too. And trying to deal with her own grief of losing her mum ad sister, and keeping an eye on me same as our other daughter there ring every day ore than I can say for so called friends we had, but I suppose there don’t now what to say, but there could just ring and say something, people say I’m doing ok whatever ok means, Ike you I’m struggling trying to cope some days just curl up and cry and I do, or phone cruise, don’t really think about the future much at the moment just take day by day, and thanks again Micky.

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Hi mickyboy.the question why can never be answered can it.I guess its just not for anyone to know.you must be in immeasurable pain.as am I .I lost my darling daughter in October.yesterday was a really bad day for me.some days are worse for me than others.my grief is so bad I sometimes don’t want to live without her.my sharryn was my daughter friend confidante and well my reason for living really.I still have to check myself that this is real and has really happened.can’t say it ever gets any easier.and I am quite angry sometimes.especially when you think that my daughter never did no wrong to anyone .and yet the bad people of this world are allowed to live .not fair.you say your daughter was a troubled soul .sorry to hear that .although in retrospect my girl sharryn was never very strong in some ways either.I send you a invisible hug.regards Annette.xxxx

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Hi Annette thanks for hug, that’s what I miss most especially around 4 when ed got home, true never did anybody any harm plus ed was a nurse for 30 odd years, still wonder if I will make it sometimes when the bad days come but my grandchildren do save me from going totally nuts hope it continues, and there don’t get fed up with me often wonder about the future but don’t suppose we can do anything about it, supposed to all planned for us, true didn’t expect this as they say never know what’s round the corner try to keep going x Micky.

Hello I’m sorry to hear this. I really get your points eg about bad people.

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