My husband passed away on 21st November 2022,
22 years to the day that we met and 2 days after our 17h wedding anniversary. He was only 41, we have 2 beautiful girls together aged 11 and 8.
My husband starting feeling bloated and barely eating in the summer of 2021, he went to the doctor’s the first time in 25 years and they told him IBS if no better in 2 weeks to go back so he did, still saying IBS and did a blood test which came back with markers but said we will repeat in 4 weeks.
He wasn’t getting any better, and luckily we had private health insurance, so he spoke to a GP online they referred him to a gastro doctor, he said he didn’t think It was anything to worry about but did bloods and a ultrasound then a CT scan while having his CT he asked if it showed anything and they said Lymphoma. He was on his own as I wasn’t allowed in die to covid.
He was referred back to NHS as they said they had a excellent cancer unit. After a biopsy it was confirmed as high grade lymphoma. We were told the best cancer to have and very curable. He started chemo he was to have 6 cycles after 3 cycles they scanned all looking good chemo had got rid of most of the cancer. After another 3 cycles he had to wait 6 weeks for a scan at 4 weeks he was having symptoms they scanned it had starting growing again after his last scan
He went on to have 3 cycles of intense chemo, after completion he would have a stem cell transplant.
After 2 cycles all looking good after the 3rd they scanned again still there, can’t have stem cell as cancer needs to be gone.
Next Step CAR-T therapy, he went to London to have his cells harvested beginning of August 2022 they are sent away and genes are put into his cells after a month they are put back in and attack the cancer. He had a chemo in that 4 weeks to keep cancer from progressing.
He was all packed ready to go in end of Aug, did a lateral flow as requested he was positive asymptomatic.
We had a video call on the Monday to be told his cancer was worse than it has ever been, he could no longer have the treatment as it would fail. He was told no point in anymore chemo as wouldn’t make a difference, he was given weeks to live.
After speaking to our local team they wanted to try one more chemo, they said have hope but not too much. He had it, was very poorly after the cycle he had another scan a few days later London called, the cancer has pretty much gone. He was admitted 3 days later to start treatment. All was going well we had meetings about him coming home then he got sepsis he was in ICU for a week. When he went back to the ward he started improving, he had a scan but we were told the devastating news that it hadn’t worked and that he had days to live. Within 48 hours he was transferred to our local hospice where we made memories with our girls. 2 weeks later he died in my arms leaving me absolutely heartbroken.
The two weeks he was in the hospice people came from all over the country he didn’t realise how special he was.
He was my first and only love, my soulmate we were inseparable.
He fought this cruel illness with so much positivity, not once was he negative, he fought for me and his girls and I’m so so proud of him. My grief is still very raw and if it wasn’t for our girls I’m not sure where I would be now.
I still speak to him everyday and always say out loud that I love him. He really was the best husband and I will love and miss him forever!
My heart goes out to everyone who is going through this, we just need to remember to take one day at a time!