A Question to ponder...

Here’s a question to ponder…
If somebody, who has no experience of grief, asked you what grief is like, how would you answer? :thinking:

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the worst feeling you could ever experience.
Pain in your heart, like it’s broken into a million pieces, heavy feeling inside , constant fear and anxiety, exhaustion, mentally and physically and a living hell :sob::sob:

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Good question, Kate.
Nearly nine months on, I am grieving terribly for Stan. I have been in a state for nearly a week. it is the afternoons which are the saddest for me.
I feel ill, in so much physical pain within my stomach, I just don’t know where to put myself. I long to put my arms around him. It generally settles when I reach the early evening. By the time I go to bed, I am back to the same dull ache which I have experienced from the evening he passed away. x x x x
ps. Steph explains it better than I can, it is indeed a living hell.

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All that and much more Steph. Thanks for your answer. :kissing_heart:

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That’s just it Mary, we can’t explain. That’s why I’m asking the question. How can we answer to do this grief justice? It is indescribable and yet I need to describe it.

I’m sorry you’re having a really bad week Mary. It goes like that, doesn’t it? I read somewhere that grief is merciful; it comes in waves because if it came all at one we simply couldn’t bear it. Sending love and strength :kissing_heart:

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Thank you dear Kate,
I know and understand that Stan and I were very lucky to have the best part of 62 years together,
I do feel for all of you, who have lost your loved ones far too soon in your lives, Most of you are far too young to be separated from those who you love most in the world.
As I have said more than once, I am convinced that when the time is right, we shall all meet again, What a joyful reunion that will be.

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Often it feels like a huge chunk of flesh has been torn away from my chest and part of my stomach. My heart at times feels heavy. My body feels weighted down and there is a rolling sadness that comes in waves. At times I want to hide. My head is often lowered.

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Unending and inescapable mental and physical torture. All consuming, incurable and unbearable. Unimaginable hell.
Xx

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Dear Mary, even in the depths of your own grief you are so considerate of others. You sound a lovely lady. Xx

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It feels like every day you are clawing your way out of the deepest darkest hole imaginable, every second waiting on falling back into the abyss and having to start your journey out again. The thought of living feeling like this for the rest of your life is indescribable.

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It does feel like that v. I feel like I’m dangling from a rope over a deep black hole and I can’t hold on :cry:
Sending love to all xx

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Intense waves of complete sadness and despair :sob:

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All of what all of you describe and more, much more. Thanks everyone for your answers. I’m searching for a true definition but I don’t think there is one. :thinking:

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2 years on and yes, it does come in waves and enables us to swim and not sink…I can relate to every word used so far, yet do they fully describe the loss of the person who was part of your being :thinking: Perhaps if laid out one after the other we would be close but still feel there was one word missing :slightly_frowning_face: I also wonder at the person I’ve become because I know I’m not the person I was :worried:

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This thing called grief is massive and life changing and yet is beyond description…

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An amputation of the soul. My heart has been shattered into pieces. Like the air has been taken out of the balloon, the stuffing removed from the ragdoll. I feel empty, deflated, depleted, weakened and devoid of my life force. It is dark, and I am cannot find my way. The light went out and the oxygen was extracted from my world. when she died.

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Thinking of you Mary, sending love :kissing_heart:

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If this was a physical pain an overdose of morphine wouldn’t even touch the sides.

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Thank you, Jobar x

Grief is so painful, it defies description x x x x x