I lost my hubby a week ago today… I never anticipated the pain… organised the funeral yesterday and it felt like they were talking about someone else… today I just want to stay in bed and hurt.
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@Kajoa
I’m so sorry that you have found yourself here. The physical pain is hard, I still feel my broken heart hurting 11 weeks down the line. Try to take care if yourself. 
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So sorry for your loss @Kajoa
I lost my husband 8 1/2 weeks ago and my heart is still broken and I guess always will be.
Please keep posting on here , the support is great and we all really understand the struggle.
The pain doesnt seem to go but one step at a time, one day at a time, you learn to cope
Take care
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It is very very early days for you. Just take each day as it comes, listen to your body and do whatever you feel is right for you. Be kind to yourself 
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I am so sorry @Kajoa. It is so painful but please know that this forum is great for talking to people who really understand. I am 9 weeks down the line and feel incredibly sad and lonely, but I also feel supported by people on this forum who are going down the same unwanted path. Take care of yourself.
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Thank you, you too.
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Thank you… you too
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It is incredibly hard when you lose yr soul- mate. My partner passed away 31/2months ago and I feel as if my heart is broken and so difficult to explain that to anyone unless they know that unrelenting pain and agony.
Thinking of everyone on this forum tonight. Xx
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So very sorry. All you can do at first is try to get through each hour, and try to eat and sleep if you can. It’s so hard.
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i list my soulmate of 30 years 10 weeks ago, ive never felt pain like this, at first i threw myself into sorting everything out, if i kept busy i could make though the day , but i couldn’t sleep i couldn’t eat but just keot hoping hed walk.in the door. i knew it wasnt possible i was with him when he died. i somehiw got through the funeral, then home to home i knew would be permanently empty . Since then ive existed but now tgectears rarely stop im an empty shell my heart is broken, all i realky want is to be with him, but i know thats not what hed want, but im struggling and after the funeral you find oeople no longer call to ask if youre ok and the loneliness is worse.
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Hi @ronnie4
I know exactly how you feel, i could have written your post myself.
I am lucky that I still have good support from family and friends. But I don’t know how long before they get fed up with my constant crying. As you say the loneliness and grief just get worse. I’m just hoping that one day I’ll learn to cope with it all
Take care
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I have made it known online to friends and family that just a hello, would be. very much appreciated and make me feel less alone.
Some have listened and heard. So, I get short and long messages from them
Others, nothing. You won’t be surprised to know they include those who were there before the funeral but not now.
I realise some will think funeral = closure.
Also, others want to get back to their normal lives as that is comforting and reassuring for them. It stops them thinking about this lies sometime in their future.
To be honest, before my husband’s death, the latter could well have been me.
I hope that in time I am seen as ‘Rose’ the friend,
not ‘Rose’ the widow, the reminder of our future.
Hugs to all of you,
‘Rose’ your friend xx
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Thats such a lovely thing to work towards.
Friend not widow. I hate the word and everything it stands for, the grief, the pain, the heartbreak and loneliness
I also don’t like being referred to as single, as far as I’m concerned I’m married and I always will be
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The letters are still addressed to MRS.
Definitely married and like you always will be.
He will always be my husband, so proud to call him that, so I will always be his wife.
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Yes I’m still Mrs and always will be.
I’m trying to make someheadway in the garden. Its hard with tears streaming down my face. I used to do it all, apart from heavy digging, but Roger took over half of it during lockdown. Now its just too much, our pride and joy now looks a so untidy, w
eeds so big you’d think they were shrubs.
I’ll do the best I can but my arthritic knee has put paid to a lot of it. Oh how I hate getting old and now to be on my own when all I want is him back its even worse.
Im sorry, im having a bad day
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I’m ,almost 71 and full of arthritis.I have a large garden that’s hard work,I try to do some weeding and tidying up every day if possible even if it’s only 15 minutes.I always did it apart from the digging and heavy lifting things it’s the only place I feel calm and peaceful.
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I am 71, I have managed to do a fair bit today, although it doesn’t look like it, but baby steps eh. I do usually feel good in the garden but today I just couldnt stop the tears. I think I’m just having a bad day
Take care
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My thoughts are with you.
You don’t need to apologise.
It’s a natural part of grieving but it hurts so much.
Monday afternoon and evening were dreadful for me.
Tackling the garden is probably going to be the same as tackling this dreadful situation we are in, bit by bit.
Sending you a very big hug xx
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I’m sorry your having a bad day they just come out of nowhere,but at least you got something done every little helps ,I can’t do more than an hour a day if that some days but however much I do I think it’s a result today it was literally 3 weeds but hey it’s 3 weeds less.
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Thankyou @RoseGardenand @LyndaK
Its been the worst day I’ve had for a while, the crying just wont stop. The pain feels raw again. When will this ever go away. I promised Roger I’d be ok. I’m afraid I’m not doing a very good job at keeping that promise. I just didn’t want him to worry about me. I’m still crying
My daughters coming later, perhaps a big hug will help.
Thank you all for caring
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