I am the same as you I am being told this is a way of greaving. Do as you feel.they tell me that things will get better with time and when you have been through the stages of greaving.
Do what feels right for yourself when it feels right. Youāre the best person to deal with things.
Three years on Iāve " reluctantly accepted" hubby isnāt coming back but it doesnāt stop me getting caught out (frequently 
).
Knowing you will never see them again is the worst feeling ever.
I donāt know where he is - - just not here at the moment.
G. X
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I learned recently that Steve had told someone that 3 months is long enough to grieve - wow! This is after heād lost his own mother.
Now Iām thinking itās time to move on, following his advice?? I really canāt atm.
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I think loosing your partner is more intense, they were a part of your life in every way. Only you will know when to move on and you will never stop grieving the loss. x
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Losing a parent is so much different from loosing your partner and soul mate. Itās a natural order for your parents to pass first and you prepare for that happening, even if just in your subconscious.
Iām at 3 months and feel Iām only just starting to grieve.
There is no timeline and everyone is different. Hope whoever told you that wasnāt trying to hurry you along - you take all the time you need. Xx
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I agree, losing a partner is so incredibly intense.
Of course, other bereavements are devastating.
I just think there is an element of a different type of love creates some different aspects of grief.
@SadGirlfriend, please donāt put pressure on yourself with a timescale .
There are too many others around who will try to do that to us 
Sending love and hugs.
Rose xx
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I donāt think anyone can or should put a timeline on grief.
Only you know how you feel and only you will know when, or if, youāre ready to move on
I personally donāt think I will ever stop grieving but hopefully I will learn how to cope with it. And I do feel Iām making small steps. But I also know that I could crumble in an instant for no reason at all.
Love and hugs to everyone 
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I do agree wit what you say. That is the way I feel.
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I kind of agree if the natural order is your parents die at a good age I lost both mine far too soon it took 25 years for me to come to terms with the loss of my dad and watching my mum suffer with cancer was awful having councillor after losing my partner has made me realise I have hidden grief around losing my parents when I was youngā¦ the only difference that I can see is that I didnāt live with my parents but I rang my mum everyday we had a close relationshipā¦
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I didnāt know him but I think he would like this.
You seem like a good person.
Take care.
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Itās easy to say that if you havenāt experienced the loss of your partner. Had he ?
Thankyou I am a very kind person sometimes I find people take advantage of my kind natureā¦
Sorry for your loss also 
So today Iām crumbling
Iāve had a good week and really thought I was coping.
I even booked a holiday, and immediately felt guilty. Although i know thats what he wanted me to do.
But today I just canāt stop crying and I dont know why.
Well I do know why, but I dont know whats sparked it.
Iāve had a pretty good week, almost at the top of the rollerciaster
But today Iām having a dip.
Hopefully Iāll get back up, when I stop feeling sorry for myself
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Oh @Liro there doesnāt seem to be any order to our feelings and emotions does there. We think we are doing ok and then it feels like we just fall off a cliff back to the bottom.
Iām so sorry youāre feeling awful today but maybe take the positives that you are moving forward by having a better week.
I think we just have to ride the storm and maybe accept the downs when they arrive, let them in and just sit with all those awful feelings. They donāt last forever and you know you can have better days and will again.
Try do something simple to help distract you maybe ?
Sending love and strength to get you through xxxx
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Thankyou @roni52
I know you are right
Iāve been up and I know I can get there again
Its just when these downs hit its hard to remember how you got up before.
Iām on my way to Church so that may help.
Iām not super reigious but since I lost Roger I do get some comfort from going. The people are very kind and welcoming and that means a lot
As does the kindness from everyone on here.
Thank you for caring
Liz x
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Sorry @Liro your not in a good place todayā¦
Iāve had a not bad week but sat to have dinner tonight looking into the garden thoughts of never sharing a meal together again set me back again it seems two steps forward and five backā¦
Iām pleased youāve booked a
Holiday itās a double edge sword though isnāt itā¦ Iāve booked a holiday just me and the dog in August I also felt guiltyā¦ thinking I shouldnāt be looking forward so soonā¦
But I think it will do us both some goodā¦
Hope tomorrow is an easier day x
Thankyou @Ilovehorses
With the love and support from everyone on here I do feel a lot better tonight.
Like you Iād had a not bad week so it took me by surprise to be so low today
Iām not as brave as you Iām going on holiday with Rogers cousins wife, sheās a widow (I hate that word) too. And I know Roger would approve.
He told me to go on holiday so I shouldnāt feel guilty.
I hate the way my brain works now. Iāve got a teeny tiny sensible bit, the rest drives me crazy.
Thanks for caring and your support
Love and hugs
Liz x x
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I started off ok today.
Then for some reason I decided to sort through old bills and papers.
That was fine, until I came across Rogerās death certificate.
Funny how a sheet of paper can open the floodgates isnt it?
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Big hug xx
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Big hug from me too. Itās difficult to see it in black and white. All so stark and no indication of how special they were.
I am sitting here surrounded by tasks, dreading the postman arriving with yet more stuff that needs sorting. No prospect of any visitors apart from a man coming to service the house alarm. No doubt he will leave very quickly if I donāt pull myself together and wash all the snotty tears away. I look like the ābeforeā pic for hayfever tablets. Xx
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