I’ve started drinking awhile ago now I’d say at least 6 months ago to cope with the loneliness from losing my grandmother and husband in the last two years. I think I’m doing ok but the alcohol helps me feel happier at the time. The calories don’t I’ve gained alot of weight but I don’t really care about anything anymore. I’m just trying to get through each hour of each day. It’s obvious that I’d miss them but wanting to be with them instead of here is heartbreaking I wish it was me who was gone not my husband or grandmother. Has anyone else started drinking after the loss of a loved one
I initially started drinking whiskey. To be honest as soon as my sister passed and I was with her at the time I had a shot of brandy to settle my nerves. That night I had whiskey before bed Hopeing it would help me sleep take the edge of. That continued for a month but I found I started to pop a nip of whiskey in my coffee on a morning. I realised this could become a problem and threw the whiskey out. I realised how easy it could be to become dependant on that nip of whiskey.
I’ve been dependant on vodka years ago. This time it’s lager but I’m drinking every day. I don’t want to be here anymore .
I understand where you are. For me it’s red wine. It helps me sleep. To be honest, a bottle arounf 9pm knocks me out. I stay away from beer, I’m carrying enough weight already, and I don’t like spirits. I feel that if I can keep it to that i’ll be ok, and if I’m not, so what, the worst has already happened to me, and I don’t wan to be here either. So, I think whatever works for you is ok.
Nothing helps me sleep not even my medication. I drink coz I’ve got nothing left to live for. I just want all this to end and it’s not going to until my final day comes it’s like having a life sentence. Think I’ll try vodka again less calories. Take care and thanks
You are’nt alone my friend. Despite taking meds for clinical depression and acute anxiety a good few strong beers daily ( sometimes more than a few. In fact rather a lot) mellows my grief effectively. I always ignore the usual warnings and platitudes like “You’ll never find the answer in the bottom of a glass” WELL Im not looking for the answer! And the usual warnings about alcoholism and bad health. WELL I’ve been taking a tipple for nearly 60yrs with no problems. And as for the health risks - I’m not bothered. The sooner Im out of this world the better. So you enjoy your drink Louise all the time it helps my friend.
Love and Light
Thanks for your kind words. I appreciate it completely
Hi. Louise. I understand your desire to blot out the pain with alcohol, but the problem is it returns when you stop. There is no ‘cure’ for grief. No medication or any method. Alcohol and medication do ease the pain, but prescribed medication is taken so we can give ourselves a bit of respite and maybe think more clearly. No doctor would prescribe alcohol as a remedy. I would not want you to think I am preaching to you, far from it, but I have seen so many who suffer from alcohol not to say something. It’s a long road this grief. We have to walk it alone, but with the help of friends and companions who know and understand. Have you had any counselling? It may be a good idea before things go too far.
Take care and be kind to yourself. John.
No I haven’t had any councling it’s been suggested to me but coz of covid everything is on hold. I’ll mention it again to my Dr’s when I see them next thanks for your kind words take care
Sue ryder do councilling. I started 2 weeks, ago its helping just being able to pour it out to someone not directly involved I don’t have to hold back worrying I’ll upset them
This is not to undermine your post in anyway my friend but a wise old doctor once quoted me a Saying. " Alcohol is a wonderful servant but a terrible master." If a person uses alcohol wisely it can give great relief during times of stress. The emphasis being on wisely.
Love and Light
Hi. Geoff, and I agree with that saying. I have the occasional drink with friends and often a can of beer on my own, but not because I want to dull the pain but because I like it. But moderation in all things. Anything can be taken to excess and alcohol is, after all, an addictive drug, as is nicotine. We don’t have to leave it alone, but drink wisely and within our limits of tolerance.
Best wishes. John.
I don’t really care either. Yes it has brought a smile to my face. I’m gonna keep on drinking i think take care
Thank you Jonathan123
@Louise7 If it makes you feel happier or stops you going mad do whatever you want. There is no moderation to our grief. Nobody to say don’t drink and it will be better. I drink a bottle of red wine every night. John and I drank a lot of wine together. We only drank in the evening. I intend to carry on the tradition
Im not going to lecture you all and ims ure some of you have read my posts i lost mty partner to alcohohol liver disease in june just aged 42 and he has completley broken me because i didnt know thw extent of his drinking he hid it well
I now dont want to drink and havent for months and i a way im glad because a few weeks ago i wasnt coping well and last thing i wanted to do was hit the bottle
Like i say im not going to satly dont drink just be careful and if you need someone to talk to wg counselling then please do my partner never told me how he was feeling he not here now
Take care xx
Sorry @Johnswife that wasnt aimed at you was for everyone dont know why it replied to you x
@Fg15 Don’t worry I understand. We are not alcoholics we are just enjoying a drink to ease the pain.
Fg15 thanks for the wise words i appreciate it loads I’m struggling ATM it’s hard