Anxiety, panic and dread…

Coping with bereavement
1

I think I may be suffering with PTSD

I found my husband in the downstairs bathroom in the middle of the night 3 months ago and had to perform CPR. Unfortunately he was confirmed brain dead three days later and we had to turn off life support.

I have such bad anxiety and panic in the night and I’m not sleeping very well at all. I’m pretty sure I’ve had about an hours sleep tonight and I have work today.

Every time I go down the stairs at night time, I get an overwhelming sense of panic and sometimes flashbacks.

My youngest is not coping at all this week and he’s been finding it hard to sleep too. He’s always needed his full 11 hours so then he’s been struggling even more the next day. Everything is so much worse when you’re not sleeping.

I’m really struggling :broken_heart:

3 Likes
2

Hello April, im so sorry for what you and your children are going through, the loss of your spouse, especially you finding him is quite traumatic, and for a child to lose their parent is life changing in the worst way, have you looked into counseling for you and your family, i believe that is the only way to be able to move forward with your lives .. my heart goes out to you and your family. I pray you find the help you all need, may God bless you and your family.

2 Likes
3

Hello again @Lightmary68 :heart:

Yes. I’ve only had one session for far but looking forward to going back. The boys have a play therapist who they enjoy going to as well.

It all comes in such waves (tsunamis sometimes) and I feel like I’ve experienced every emotion under the sun in such a short space of time - I’m so exhausted.

I saw the doctor yesterday - the same GP has re booked me with her every couple of weeks since it happened which is really lovely.

I’m supposed to be going to a family hen party in Paris Friday for three nights and I’m absolutely terrified to leave them when they’re struggling so much. The doctor told me that I really need some space and it will do them good as well.

Thank you :heart:

2 Likes
4

Hello, happy to hear you’re getting the therapy you need, and for your boys as well. I know we go through so many emotions, not one of them is good. Hopefully with time those precious memories will put a smile on our face instead of tears..you do what you feel is right for you and your boys as far as this trip to Paris. Take care, and God bless you

2 Likes
5

Hi April

I’m

Struggling too so badly

4 Likes
6

Hi Jacqui I am so sorry to hear you are in pain. I don’t know how long it’s been for you but things do get better. There are things that help and you may need to have therapy to help. I hope you find so peace here on this site. It has really helped me as everyone understands how painful a bereavement is

Wishing you all the strength you need and sending you hugs

All the best Tom :hugs: :hugs:

1 Like
7

So sorry to hear of your loss under those traumatic circumstances. I can relate to your pain and the anxiety, panic attacks and sleepless nights as this is what I am going through at the moment, after losing my husband 2 months ago. I am also looking for advice and support on how to cope. We can only hope and pray to keep strong. Sending my love

3 Likes
8

Hi Brandon, I am newly widowed, am struggling quite badly. You spoke of therapy. I would be particularly interested to hear what therapy you spoke of and where did you access it. Thank you

,

2 Likes
9

Dear Whirlwind I am sorry to hear about your husband and the pain you are going through. You might find therapy useful and I am sure we can ask for therapist that other member of this site use, unfortunately I live in Northern Spain so the therapist I could recommend wouldn’t be of any use. If you are interested on online therapy I am sure there are people here who could recommend one. Bereavement groups are also popular and there are normally quite a few options. I personally used one from the church which was useful. For me personally walking was a big help. I hope you find this site helpful as I have. Everyone understands the pain of bereavement here.

Wishing you all the strength you will need and sending hugs :mending_heart: :mending_heart: :mending_heart:

All the best Tom :hugs: :hugs:

10

Hello whirlwind. So sorry to hear about your loss. I lost my husband in March. We were married for 35 years..i miss him so much, my life has changed so much since he passed..what has helped me cope is talking about my grief. I am fortunate to have a friend who understands, she lost her son to cancer a few years ago. She calls me almost every day, or sends me uplifting messages. ..and posting here on this site helps me as well, everyone here understands. I hope it helps you as well. Take care and God bless you :folded_hands:

1 Like
11

Thankyou so much for taking the time to reply. it means so much. So pleased I have found this site. Take care and keep strong x

3 Likes
12

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply., it means so much. I will look into therapy, thanks again and take care

3 Likes
13

Hey :waving_hand:

Its been 9 weeks

I feel so lost sometimes .. I’m so pleased to hear that it does get better x

2 Likes
14

Hi whirlwind If you do try therapy don’t give up if you don’t like your first try. When my wife was looking for a therapist the first one she tried didn’t help her but the second one was very helpful. She had a lot of issues after her mother died and when she was given five months to live after a bile duct cancer diagnosis she went back to the same therapist to help her come to terms with her own mortality. I hope you find someone who helps you. Wishing you all the best Tom :hugs: :hugs:

1 Like
15

Dear Jacqui my wife died on Christmas day and the first three months were the worst, over the next nearly four months things have been improving bit by bit, every so often I have a bad few days but the time between these days grows. I have been using exercise to help especially walking. Being exhausted at the end of the day helps with sleep. I also found walking in nature is good for mental health. I hope you find things that help you. Wishing you all the best Tom :hugs: :hugs:

1 Like
16

Hello Jacqui68, im so sorry for your loss, I lost my husband in March..i have also felt lost, 35 years married to my beautiful husband and all of the sudden, I hafta live without him, :cry: its hard moving on without him, we were a team, he was my best friend, now im so alone, having to make decisions on my own, there’s things I wont be able to do anymore. Our plans for our future. Gone…im sorry, Im just going on and on…it does help to be able to talk about your grief especially with people who are going through the same thing..we understand what you’re going through..i do have adult children, and they are a great support for me as are my friends, but I miss my husband . I hope posting here helps you. Take care and God bless you :folded_hands:

2 Likes
17

Thankyou Brandon for your response. I will heed your advice on choosing a therapist. Wishing you too all the best

1 Like
18

Hi Tom

God that gives me hope this morning I was so bad when I woke up .. my whole body aches

3 Likes
19

I feel the same way.. I have adult children too .. I’m

Definitely not coping very well ..

3 Likes
20

Hi Jackie,

I am new to this group - These lovely people are a wonderful group of supportive & thoughtful people to reach out to.:handshake:

It is a torturous endurance but we try to get through it together​:crossed_fingers::heart_hands:

I am struggling this morning , but here to chat if you are up to it .. for you & all​:mending_heart:

1 Like