Thank you so much 
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Good morning all, ive been catching up on all of today’s posts, and most if not all describe exactly how im feeling. I do have my family close, 2 children, 2 grandchildren who i adore, and like someone else said. Im sad cause my husband isn’t here to enjoy our precious grandchildren together 
. This might be silly, but I still send my husband pictures of my grandchildren to his phone, its as if I don’t want him losing out on what they’re up to. He loved them so much. Even having my family, sure they keep me distracted sometimes but I still feel lonely. Was married for 35 years. We were never apart, he was my best friend. And doing things do seem pointless now, I also had many hobbies, but haven’t done anything, nor do I feel like doing. I just want him back may God bless you all
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Hi LightMary I understand how you feel. I get very upset thinking of the things my husband is missing out on. I do talk to him quite a lot!! Take care and plod on as we do xx
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Thanks for replying . I think people in general think after 3 years you should be be getting on with your life but beleve me its not an easy task when you have to do everything on your own It’s a struggle on a daily bases .
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Hello Hope, I lost my husband 9 weeks ago, and people who haven’t lost a close loved one they have no clue, they probably just think your sad and you’ll start doing better, they don’t realize how truly deep those feelings are, for some, their lives are completely changed, people don’t see that or realize the depth of those feelings. Your lost, confused, angry, sad, and still trying to appear somewhat normal. I know it’ll take me a lifetime to be able to truly enjoy life again. I wanted to share everything with my husband, and to move on without him is torture 
. God bless you
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I totally agree with everything you’ve said. After almost 40 years of sharing everything, you cant help but feel lost without that person and their support and sharing everything. Its a difficult adjustment for sure.
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Hello I feel for you, spending day after day alone. Do you have friends nearby? I have a good circle of friends but still no one asks me to spend time at weekends, so I think Im going to have to ask them to come and do something with me. We want friends and family to read our minds, but they probably assume we are ok! If anyone has any ideas in how to fill our weekends, I would be grateful.
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Morning
You message really hit home as Bank Holiday Monday I mooched around both in the house and out as like you, I did everything with my husband. Family and friends are brilliant but they have their lives to lead. Its a situation we’ve been put in and one we dont want. I just wish for all of us in this situation and easier way of getting through this grief.
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I went out with my family but I am never where I want to be
Now Ive started looking for him wherever I go! Big bald and beautiful,couldnt miss him.
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Hello LucyJack
You are right about the sense of being lost, abandoned almost.
For me it’s a question of identity. We were married for 48 years. We identified as a couple for 48 years and now, suddenly, we aren’t a couple. I am struggling to decide who I am now and who I want to be.
I suppose it’s rather like being a bird stranded on the ground with a broken wing. It doesn’t matter how much you flap around, getting airborne again is going to be difficult!
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So true Rjay I felt abandoned over the weekend. That was just my perception though. Rationally I know that but it’s hard not to feel this way. It’s upwards and onwards this week. I’ve got things in my diary from tomorrow so feeling a bit more positive xx
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Hi, hope you are well?
After my dad passed, I was always trying to fill days with as much activity as i could to keep busy and keep going, but I just ended up being overwhelmed, overtired, and right back where i started.
What really helped was when I stripped it all back and kept it simple - reading a book, doing a puzzle, or creating a ‘legacy’ list ( A list of all the things they loved! Could be their best or worst jokes, things they loved, or their best advice)
If with frienda and family, keep it simple, low key and easily exitable if you need space - movie marathon, tv series, food night when they bring a dish each and just sit and be with eachother….
Hope this has helped - on the other hand it may all be a lot of gobbledeegook lol x
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Thats a great description ab
out the bird!
Iagree with what you say. To be alone after being a part of someone else and melded together in all ways is difficult to get used to.
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Great ideas, thank you. I also wondered about joining a society, like Oddfellows or U3A.
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Hi and thanks for your message and so sorry for your loss .Its early days for you so keep posting its always been my lifeline .I’m good at putting a mask on but it’s so exhausting at least you can be your true self on here and people understand .We carry on without them but missing them never goes away the love continues and grief is the price we pay I guess x
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Hi and thanks for your message I do have a dear friend not far away we have always been there for each other so I’m lucky to have her but the fair weathered friends come and go and not to be relied on.I have made two friends on here nice ladies but live a way off and we meet for a meal a couple of times a year so that’s nice but we will always miss our loves 
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Hello Rjay, wow you described how I am feeling, spot on, I don’t know if I’ll be able to fly again . God bless
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Hello Lucyjack
I totally understand what you are saying I too have a wonderful family and friends but often the loneliest times are the weekends though I try to set myself a task to do - it may only be a trip to the supermarket or a walk in the local park but it helps to break the day up. I also think it’s important to say how you feel to your closest friends/family as they may be unaware. I lost my husband of 45 years on 20th April 2026 so am very new to this and grief and loneliness can seem overwhelming at times but this is a good space to share that. Everyone is so kind - I hope you find a balance that works for you sending love and hugs 
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My heart goes out to you as I read the posts.Its a lonely place we are in.It’s just over a year since losing my loved one..I have no siblings..and live 12 hours away from home..with language barrier too.
My husband didn’t have friends other than a few school ones fir maybe twice a year contact.I was his love and friend.I retired six months after he passed..now sailing on alone. The evenings are tough, the weekends are tough too. I have realised that noone is coming to get me out of this situation. Really and truly.
I wish there were physical too groups of widowed women, bereaved others who get it, and understand. Everyone else doesn’t get it!! If you happen to meet one who knew you both..they rarely include you..and do not even ask how you’re getting on and offer tangible help, just showing up. No..they don’t. Last week a couple turned up at my rural home and all they asked for was payment for some meal at the village if I wished to come long 
I kicked myself for paying for this meal I don’t even want to as I do not feel I belong.. It’s not possible for me to just turn around..sell up and return..
I am lost..
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Im so sorry for your feeling of isolation. Think the only answer is to try and get out and about and be with people as that makes your and your life feel normal again.
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