Realised I read through all this thread at 4am! Then read through other threads, for hours and ended up back here. Time to put the TV on and fall asleep with it on hopefully. Usually better at sleeping when I should be getting up.
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Itās like when the world is awake so it takes the pressure off you being able to sleep
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And so another night !
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@Copenhagen1
Yep here again at 3.45am, grrrrr!
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So sorry, I didnāt see your message
I donāt even get into bed until 2 now
Do I need to choose photos for the funeral?
Itās a personal choice. Family could help choose
To look at during the wake or just talking about them. Do people do a projector running?
We had a slide show at my Brothers funeral during the time of reflection with some of his favourite music playing
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Thank you will start it tomorrow as funeral this Friday.
The funeral director may advise if they can offer it
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Hello Copenhagen, I totally understand how you feel at night time, it can be so long, I lost my only sibling who lived with me, I lost Frank Feb 14th 2023 to Cancer. Its nearly two years but I cannot still accept his death, the house is so quiet, I miss him so much. I am so sorry for your loss it is still so new. Reach out to this group, wonderful people here. Best wishes to you.
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Thank you for your post
I do , i understand how you feel, i turn everything off beca im tired then bang the flashbacks come, i just cant forget, dont think i ever will, over a year later, so my tv goes back on, very long and tiring nights, BUT ive found reading books helps , takes your mind away from everything for a while, so try it. Weāre all here for you, hang in there, it will get better, i know it will xxĢx
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Thank you so much for your support x
Yes I do, itās not that I canāt get to sleep (sometimes I have trouble), itās that sheās not lying next to me, that Iām going to bed alone. It was often the case that Iād be alone in bed due to her being in hospital, but then there was always the hope that tomorrow sheād be home & back beside me. Now that hope is gone. Itās almost a year since I lost her, & itās still a problem. Itās almost her 51st birthday & then 4 days later itāll be the first anniversary. Iāve been at the hospital most of today, as the community nurse phoned just after 11am to say sheād just found my mum on the floor & had called an ambulance. Sheās got a very black left eye & a cut in her eyebrow. A ct scan has shown the fall has also caused a bleed in her brain. Due to her age (sheāll be 88 on Monday), being frail and her general health being poor they decided against operating, as it would be more hazzardous than not. The doctor said things could go either way. So tonight is worse than ever, as Iām half listening for the phone to ring.
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I have been slowly decorating the house because it doesnāt feel like a home anymore. But my daughterās blocked all access to her/our social media so i canāt even put up some new images. So as much as l am moving on the old pictures doesnāt help.
Hi i do hope you and your mum are ok, my heart is hurting for you, but you must stay strong, i find thinking of the positives does help, my grandkds certainly do, bless them, it is very hard, but i am so glad of this community , you know youre not alone. Youll be ok love, x
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Ive not been to bed since i lost my husband when i wasnāt working nights we went at the same time, i struggle from 4-15 when he would be home from work i just sit looking at his chair, its so hard for us all to come to terms with this
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Sadly we didnāt have children, my wife became ill 2 to 3 years after we got married, she was medically retired at just 23. She had chronic asthma & was described once by a Papworth consultant as the worst asthmatic heād ever met. Mainly due to the speed she became very ill, she scared our GP once, we were there for something else & the GP said there wasnāt an upto date peak flow on her records, so could she do one. It set off an attack our GP was running around like a headless chicken, she grabbed nurses and allsorts to help, we left the surgery by ambulance, my wife having walked in fine.
I try to think positive but itās getting harder & harder, I just seem to be lurching from one crisis to another. I was supposed to be taking mum to the theatre on 30th but I really donāt think sheāll be well enough, or if sheāll even be out of hospital by then. Iām not sure she even realises sheās in hospital, Iām fairly sure she knows sheās in bed by the things she keeps doing.
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