The people who say yes & no in the Government should come & have a taste of it!! It’s not something we really want! We’d pay them to have our partners back and be rid of the grief & loneliness etc!
My wife was a nurse for 40 years plus & after me chasing they finally paid her ‘death in service’ today. Only 6 weeks to pay it!!! No explanation etc of the amount! I phoned them & they said that takes another 2 weeks to send? Why? Everything is so hard and nobody knows what it’s like having to go through it do they
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I’ve just received my ‘why we cannot pay you’ letter.
I’m not pregnant and we don’t have a child!
If I was pregnant at my age, I wouldn’t need the payment, I’d be selling my story!
Exactly what does happen to all the money he’s paid…?!
The government get to kerp it, probably pays for their drinks bills. It annoys me that we as widows/widowers dont get the amount paid that our partbers should have. We have lost an income but they dont see that.
My first husband died when he was 55, my sister died when she was 51, her husband died when he was 60. All of them paid National Insurance for the whole of their working lives but did not live long enough to get a pension.
My second husband lived long enough to get his pension for 18 months. His pension died with him because I paid a full stamp and have my own pension.
There is a lot of talk about people living longer and the pension bill rising. But no mention of the many people that die before state pension age and the contributions they paid. They make the state pension sound like a benefit or a favour. But it is neither, it is a right that working people have paid for through National Insurance contributions.
If our deceased partners had opted out and paid that money into a private scheme, or even stuffed it under the mattress, the surviving spouse would have inherited it.
Or have I misunderstood the system?
ill be sadly laying my partner to rest on Wednesday never goodbye its see you later …the emotions im having is so painful and then anger and screaming just dont seem it getting easier
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Whrn my wife died 5 months ago we looked at getting B S A but was told she not paid enough nat insurance to get it, i ended up getting sweet bugger all not one penny. She was disabled and i had stopped working to care for her but that made no difference still got nothing
@tracyrick its a hard time isn’t it!, It feels so final doesn’t it! I just focused on the service and went into auto pilot until I got home and then unleashed my grief and sorrow! It won’t be an easy day nor should it be really as you’re saying goodbye…. I’m a believer in people’s spirits being around us so your partner will be by your side…. It will get better after Wednesday though… very slowly, bit by bit & day by day you’ll start to cope with it better. However, you’ll have your bad days as I had mine yesterday!! I posted on here and I got responses which lifted me back up today! You just have to go with the roller coaster of emotions. People are on here to support, so like I did, just shout for help! It’s only 11 weeks since my wife passed away so I can understand how you’re feeling- we all can.
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Each day, you will have different emotions, some good days some bad days where you just want to be left alone and cry. As the months pass the bad days dont feel as bad and you manage to do more things on those days. I’m on month 15 and each day, I feel stronger. I still have those days where I want to scream, cry and not want to get dressed but then I remember our good times and smile to myself it lifts my mood so I feel better.
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thank you …it was very hard i think we done him proud …and like you said derek you keep going until you get home … thank you all for the support and telling me this is normal to feel this way i screamed on Tuesday just because i drop some water i was so angry then look at his picture and say sorry i feel grateful that i found this site and we can give some people some comfort thank again because we are going through the same
@tracyrick Horrible autopilot day isn’t it! I was smiles and yes I’m fine thanks, yes feel free to come over, I’ll keep in touch etc. None of it happened!! Not yet anyway…. I couldn’t wait to be on my own….
At least you’ve got through that physical side… You’ve got to just set aside time for you now. I’ve just agreed to meet someone in town for a coffee and I’m also in a type of panic! I know I’ll end up in tears!! However I remember someone saying that’s why God gave us tears! Poor Gods reservoir for me must be working overtime to keep the reservoir topped up!! Anyway shout, cry etc but each week will be a bit better! We’re all here if we need each other! X
yes thats actually how it was keep in touch don’t be a stranger …if you need us just give us a call all that … but least on here we arent judge and we are all in the same boat which is so sad …like you i just dont know where all these tears come from there is plenty and never stop …if you can make the coffee its a start
My husband did the same too. He died 13 months ago now. It meant I could pay for the funeral and wake without stress. The rest got sorted over time but he always said he’d see me right. Bless him, he kept his word. Little did he know how our country could change so fast leaving pensioners struggling to pay their bills eh?!
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Im 61 my husband passed away 7th august this year i have guardianship of a young boy i received 3500 and 150 a month for 18 months but my friend lost her husband 4 months ago she is 59 with no children and couldnt get anything life can be so unfair in more ways tha 1, that said i would give every penny back to have more time with my husband
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Sorry for your loss of your Husband…. I don’t understand why? Did she appeal it or did they give a reason why?
I’ve never heard of this payment not that I want anything I wasn’t entitled to any of my fiancé stuff all went to his daughter I just had back his engagement ring and a few cards I gave him years ago his ex thinks it’s all fun and games was even banned from funeral sorry for your loss
I had heard of it but not for pensioners.
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If you’re receiving your state pension it’s not (sadly) payable. I’d love to know how someone who’s on pension is supposed to pay. Perhaps they can claim another benefit?
Well I hope that people that are entitled to this gets it
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You have to make sure you put a claim in, its not automatically payed out.
I won’t do that as we wasn’t married it all went to his youngest daughter