Oh your right the first birthday I spent with Dave was my 19th and this may I will be 56. Monday my 35th wedding anniversary I just don’t know what to do
Take care x
Keep posting on here, it will make you feel a tiny bit better if that’s possible.
You are not on your own, we are all here for you x
We do really know how you feel.
Keep reaching out.
Jacqui xx
Hi Sah, so sorry to hear about your husband and facing your anniversary and birthday without him. My husband died suddenly two weeks before our 35th wedding anniversary in November. His 65th birthday immediately followed Christmas and New year and I dreaded each and every occasion. I think I got through them because I was numb with shock. On my husband’s birthday my sons decided to do a walk we had never done together and a pub lunch where we also had never eaten. They tried so hard to get me out and motivate me despite their own desperate grief and I feel guilty that all I could think of was that my husband wasn’t with us. I think what I am trying to say is that it’s such early days for you that it is just another day to approach as you do any other day at the moment. I don’t think any of uus on this site can anticipate more than a few hours ahead. Wish I could be of more help other than to let you know you are not alone. We are all learning from each other. Take care
Hi Jobar
Thankyou for your kind words. Numb your right nothing seems real.
Today is the first day I have not spent all day in my bedroom. It’s been the only place I can find strength , small step
Take care.
Hi Sah
So sorry about your husband. You’re right, it all feels like the worst nightmare. Small steps, minute by minute is the only way.
My husband died suddenly on 6th February this year. One of the worst things I am finding is that you don’t realise what you’ve lost until it’s gone. He was always later going to bed than me, he had an aspiration pneumonia in the early hours, but it was very sudden, didn’t hear a sound. I am so sad that I wasn’t with him, even if I couldn’t save him I could have held his hand and hugged him 
Clare
Hi Clare
I know that’s what is so hard the suddeness no time to say goodbye , im here hold him
Small steps Clare.
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That is very empowering
thankyou.
Thank you xx
Alex2
When a deep loss relates to us, it made me realise how much and such a devastation the same/similar loss does to others in the same situation. It may not make our losses any easier, but it made me realise how others are suffering too, all I can say is go with the flow, allow yourself to grieve and be kind to yourself.
Blessings,
MaryL
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Thank you so so much maryL that’s such a beautiful thing to say especially when your going through your own grief. Not having a good time with family at the min my family have been great but due to lockdown I can only see them on video call I just want to climb through the phone hug them n never let them go. I’m struggling I’m like everyone else alone it’s killing me. I just can’t cope at all
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Sorry Mary L pressed the reply button before I could say god bless n thank you xx
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God Bless you too, Alex2. You are very welcome xx
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Hi Shirley,
Hope you are ok, after yesterday, must of been so hard to get through the day. Every occasion that comes up now through life is so painful, hopefully in time we can smile a little bit more. Thinking of you
Steph x
Hi Steph,
Monday was so hard. I cried all day. At the cemetery i just sobbed missing my Dave so much. Family kept phoning but I couldn’t speak to anyone.
I hope you are keeping well
Shirley x
It’s so painful, but you got through it. The build up to that is just so awful and scary and the day itself is heartbreaking. I’m ok, more bad days than good, this grief is torture.
Take care Shirley x
Hi Jobar,
How are you doing ? It’s 3 1/2 months since I lost my darling husband Dave. The pain and loss is so unbearable I’m not coping so alone x
Hi Sah, I totally understand that unbearable feeling. It’s six months since my husband died suddenly and I struggle every day to believe that I will never see him again. That dreadful longing that follows me everywhere no matter how I try to distract myself. I muddle through each day somehow going from hour to hour, existing not living. So many of us on this site feel the same. For me the despair is mixed with anger that the happy future we had so looked forward to will never materialize and I have no plan B. It’s exhausting and the loneliest feeling imaginable. Reading other posts is what gets me through so I hope you will find that too. Even momentarily it’s a saviour.
Thinking of you xx
Jacqui’s,
I am so sorry you are going through this. I myself lost my partner the same way at home on 26th April. I had no idea what was happening , my neighbour tried to resuscitate him followed by the ambulance crew. It was totally out of the blue do I know the shock a d pain you are going through. I’m walking in a daze most of the time and I’m trying to organise his funeral. I talk to people who knew and loved him and find this comforting.
I’m to.d things do get better better but for the moment my heart is breaking.