Hi everyone , hope you are all coping, I went out today to do some shopping to a place where me and my Husband often went, so.always the memories of those times. Its so much harder.on your.own, now the shops are really filling up with Christmas stuff,cards with Husband on, just felt my loss more today, already had one Christmas without him, as he died.in July 2022, this year feels like I’m more aware of things, going on, did anyone else get.the feeling of worse the second year.
I will go through all the run up to Christmas ,but feel like its going to be hard to do, got Sons, and Grandkids, so will concentrate on them,
I lost my Parents within months of each other, during the covid restrictions so been a tough few years for the family, like.many others on here, just not the same anymore.,
I’m not doing christmas this first year . I am off abroad and a friend has invited my son and I for new year . That I can cope with
@Sandra19531 hi, yes I found the second year without my husband very hard , I feel like he is getting further and further away from me , the first year I think I was still so numb and raw, and people did try and understand how I felt , and of course all the paperwork I had to do ,kept me busy . I think people thought after I had gone through all the firsts ,I should be moving on ( still don’t understand what that means ) But to me it was harder knowing that this is my life now ,a life without my husband that I never wanted. Any problems ,I had to sort out myself ,Any illness , I have to look after myself , I really just miss the happiness he gave me ,the comfort he made me feel . Knowing I was special to someone and that he loved me unconditionally. All hard facts now , there’s only me , not US. …As for Xmas ,I haven’t put a tree up the last two years , I couldn’t face sitting on my own on a night with a bloody twinkle tree. I haven’t sent Xmas cards either. Xmas well and truly cancelled in our house . Xtake carex
I’m not doing Christmas this year as my husband suddenly and unexpectedly died a week before Christmas 2022. That week I was in shock and numb. This year is going to be the first anniversary and will be so real and hard. Life is just so unfair and cruel.
Me too
Not doing Christmas this year my 1st without him.
I am just staying at home remembering last year when we were in Australia with family this year at home on my own couldn’t face Australia on my own yet.
So meal for 1 watching tv going for a walk looking at the Christmas Decorations neighbours have put out and just taking all the time i have remembering what we had for 35 years. Would go away abroad but on my own not yet ready for it.
Christmas is just another day i spend without him 
like everyother day now.
Take care x
I, too, will prefer to be on my own this Christmas. My dear husband was in a nursing home all over Christmas last year, and passed away on 10 January. I shall feel better in my own company.
Hi this is my first Christmas without my husband i dont want to do Christmas its so hard am really struggling as it is x
That feeling of being special to a person that’s what I miss so much, would never get that again. Your words could be mine, all the best m,
Hi @Kathy6 so sorry for your loss. Yes no matter what .we will never get that feeling ever again . This existence now without our one and only true love ,Is so hard and pointless. I miss so much of my happy life with my husband . He was my best friend also. I just miss and love him more and more each lonely day . Xtake carex
Do you know I read this and thought had I posted this recently because our names being the same and my husband dying in July 22 too, a very unhappy coincidence. I have volunteered to work this Christmas. I just want to ignore it, it seems so much worse this year. My darling hubby adored Christmas. I’m dreading the festivities. It’s not just Christmas though is it, the enjoyment of everything has gone. There is always someone missing, even when our 1 year old grandson does Roly poly with his arms, I wish he was here to witness it.
Me too, how is it possible to be so sad, I’m usually a glass full type of person, I don’t recognise myself.
Hi Sandan75,yes its a very unhappy coincidence, as you say. Sorry for.the loss of your dear Husband, same time ,July 22,as mine,.I know, it does feel to be worse this year, very similar to me.how I’m feeling. I’ve also got a little Grandson, hes nearly 14months, now, he was born 6 weeks after my Husband died, he would have loved the little fella. And it breaks your heart thinking he never seen his Grandson,.your little Grandson sounds so.cute, they are a tonic to us.
Your going to volunteer this Christmas, you say, if that brings you peace thats good.
I totally agree with you that it’s not just.Christmas. its any time,.they are missing, we hope they are.looking down.on us, theres so many of us, going through this loss, take care.
Yes my little grandson, our first was born 4 weeks after Stephen died, he was trying so hard to hold on to meet him, I’m just thankful that we were able to have that news together that we were going to be grandparents and that he was a little boy.
My husband died a year ago this week on Nov 3 2022. I went to my daughter’s last Christmas but was in a trance.
We moved to this house in January 2020. We chose it because it would be great for hosting family gatherings including Christmas. Christmas 2020 was ruined by Covid, 2021 my daughter was working,2022 I was in no fit state to host anything. This year the family will all be coming here to have the Christmas my husband and I envisaged together. There will be 9 of us and joy and tears, but that’s ok.
Hi @Bluebell47
Wishing you all the best for your family Christmas together. Although your partner is not there in body but he will be happy that you are able to go ahead this year.
For me it will be Christmas on my own the 1st one i am not ready to visit family our daughter is in Australia but hopefully planning for next year
Take care
Lynne x
Than you for your good wishes. At our family Christmas I will also be thinking of those who are grieving and spending Christmas alone
Hi All
Hi Broken
My Paul died july 22 and I feel exactly as you do
When it’s 2024 we are even further away
You are so right about the firsts some of my friends think get over the firsts then…… it’ll be ok
I’m going backwards to be fair I never got forwards like you say I was numb
I’m existing not living
I’m just functioning and mist days extremely badly
I so miss Paul
Just like every single person on here missing thier other half
But like you say now we are alone and I’m not coping
Take care everyone
Xx
I don’t think friends really have a clue do you. I’m feeling lost, broken hearted, scared, tired, sick, sad, overwhelmed……. Certainly not moving on like they feel we should be. I know they are trying to be kind but very sadly, one day they will understand . But until it happens to them they have no idea. Keep strong I hope peace is ahead for us all x
Hi
So true we all have our feelings losses to deal with unfortunate we did not want them to leave us nor did they want to leave us but they have and now this new life starts. Take care have a good monday x