Coping with bereavement

Is there someone i can just chat to I’m really struggling.

Thank you

Hi
Please chat away x

Hi Kim 5, thank you for responding, are you in the same situation ? i just cant seem to move on at the moment totally lost without Dave the only things that have kept me going is my cat & garden obviously my daughter but i dont think she has ever let go no tears at the funeral said she had to keep strong for me.

Hi I lost Mick 13 months ago to cancer diagnosed that it had spread 3 days before he died. I have a son and daughter 27 and 25 my son has just moved out he has been my rock. My daughter and granddaughter have moved in with me now after her break up. My daughter struggles. I started counselling a few weeks ago I felt worst a year on.
Kim

Hi Tilly, I am sorry for your loss, which I well understand, as my wonderful husband died last year. You have come to the right place. We are here to support and help one another and I know you will always get a loving and constructive reply from someone when you post.
I can’t say everything will be fine, because it doesn’t work like that. The loss of someone you love impacts for life, but I think we gradually learn how to cope with the pain and make some sort of a life. I am sure this will happen to you given time.
Keep posting. Stay safe and take care. Hugs, Ann

Hi AnnR, Thank you for your kind words sorry for your loss i just think life is not fair sometimes, Dave said to me once when I’m gone please find some else to spend your life with easier said than done, i do miss male companionship but that’s as far as it goes. Are you coping with life alone?

Hi Tilly. 67 I too have very much struggled these past months. I lost my partner to cancer 15 weeks today and I find its all very consuming as he’s in my thoughts 24/7. I have gone back to work and that helps a little but I dread going home and I hate the weekends so much . I sometimes wonder if I’ll ever feel normal again

Chris

Hi Kim5, I had 1 counselling session which was not helpful at all she just kept promoting was working in a charity shop not for me I’m afraid, then had 6 sessions through Steps to Well-being they dont solve or give you a cure but to talk to someone outside the family helps. I have a daughter with a lovely family but when i visit i still feel alone and i live alone it must be great having your daughter & granddaughter living with you people around helps doesn’t it?

Hi Tilly,
Thanks for your concern. I am managing to cope thanks, much of that is due to my wonderful family.
Like you, and your husband, Tony and I talked about what would happen when one of us died and we both said that the other one should find someone else. Then, we both said that there was no way anyone else would do! Almost a year on, I still feel the same. You can’t improve on perfection, and I had that in Tony. That sort of love and caring can’t be repeated and I don’t even want to try to find anyone else. I am going to carry on with my lovely memories. I was so lucky for 57 years and I must be grateful for that. I can’t expect more, and I would feel greedy if I did.
I hope you are coping too. Thank goodness for this site and the friends w3 make on here.
Hugs, Ann

Hi AnnR, It’s good to chat with someone who is going through the same as you.
Love & hugs to you too.

Hi Chris6, I know what you mean about going indoors and there is no-one there, when i have had a great day with my family i usually cry on my journey home because of the thought of entering an empty house, but we keep going some how. Normal perhaps it comes in time but i feel sometimes its a long road ahead, keep strong that’s what he would want.

Hi Tilly.67
It’s exactly the same for me no matter where I’ve been I cry all the way home . The thought of the years of loneliness ahead fill me with dread but I’m hoping as time goes by these feelings start to lessen
Chris x

Hi Chris6, the problem is we have obviously both had a very loving relationship one minute together the next you are alone, they would not want us to be sad and lonely its getting over that hurdle and i think that just comes with time longer with some than others, he will always be with you. I get thoughts of past holidays and smile we have shared a lot more than some people, love & happiness we have to be strong that’s what they would want xx

Hi
It does help buts at the same time I still feel lost. I am having counselling from this site certainly helps me to talk to someone outside the family. My daughter hates living back at home but has no choice at present. Mick died at home that’s hard for her.
Take care x

Tilly67

Yes we do have to be strong . It’s still early days for me but like you I have nice memories of our time together . Getting over this hurdle will probably take a long time but the support on here I find really helps xx

Hi Chris6, its good to know you can express your feelings and people understand, you are not judged or told to get on with it, thank you xx

Yes me,my wife passed on the 9th April 3 weeks ago,I have no one now,all alone to face the world.There are no words to explain how I feel.lost,frightened,since my lovely wife Rosie x passed away I have been searching for some-one to talk to,as no one knows how we feel until it happens to you !
Just writing this my eyes are full of tears,still believe Rosie x is coming home ?

My name is Kev,aged 66 also,

If you would like to chat to me anytime ?

Take care,

Kev.

I’m 6 weeks on and I still think (with one half or my brain) that he will come home. Obviously the logical part tells me that it can’t happen but neither part of my brain tells me why this has happened. He was only 50 and they can’t find a cause of death. The advice I have been given it to just breathe through each day. Try to reach out for help here, friends, family, GP, Cruse Bereavement- anywhere you can. No one can take away your pain - it is because you loved her so deeply, but we do understand. Sending hugs

Tall chap _999
Hi it’s hard to comprehend isn’t it that they will never come home again . I replay the same scene in my head over and over and my stomach lurches with the reality
My partner passed 16 Jan and he would have been 66 last week. I think you will find some comfort on here ast least as the feelings you have are the same as others do so you know you’re not alone jn that way .

Chris x

Tall chap 999, I am so sorry for your recent loss at least when we chat to each other we all know and understand the emotions of loosing a loved one are, even when in company you can still feel alone. I am further on since Dave Passed away but still have very hard days, take each day as it comes, cry get angry dont do anything if you’re if feeling drained there are no hardened rules do it your way but dont be afraid to ask for help if it gets too tough. Please chat anytime.

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