Hi Christine
Hopefully seeing my show will keep me in a good frame of mind as Fathers Day is approaching and will be the first on my own. Will get some flowers tomorrow. If finances allow, I might try and get out the weekend somewhere too as next week we have the train strikes.
At the end of this week my dancing friends will be going on there holidays as their seasons are finishing. Cant wait to see them for their next season starting in September. I’ll still chat to them though.
Hope the creep isn’t into naturism this hot weather as I cant imagine what would be worse. He seems a very sad individual.
I’d like to think our Mums are all looking down on us and smiling giving us strength to get through each day.
Hope you have a good day tomorrow.
I’ll try and post some pics. Wont be doing stage door as I dont anyone in this show. Should be a great afternoon !
Sending love and best wishes
Neil x
Brilliant! Will defo watch it. Just posted to Neil about the bloody creep throwing bread in my garden after having the work done in the loft. There’s something very wrong with him. There must be. I resisted the urge to throw it back. That is prob what he was expecting, so then he would have accused me of doing that to him. I know how this works, the tittty tat brigade and I’m not going to play. I’ve reported him with pics as evidence. It is so petty and childish but he’s not getting away with it.
How’s the sunshine up there. It’s going to be HOT 32 Friday so I will be dieing! When I was a kid we would come down to stay with my auntie for hols in the summer and it was like being abroad! We never got really hot summers up there. If it was 18 the paddling pool would come out and everyone would be in the freezing North Sea like it was Spain. Love chatting about the weather. Don’t know why. Must be a middle aged thing I’ve become accustomed to.
Going to see if The Great British Sewing Bee is on but I’ve missed most of it. Seem to lose track of time when I’ve been in the garden, like nothing else really matters. Timewarp.
Lots of love xxx
I have discovered dictation to text so excuse me if my posts are full of strange words and spelling mistakes!
Hopefully though it will stop me getting repetitive strain in my thumbs!
You are right Christine a friend said when the mug is mended in Japanese style it will become more than a memory or a memento that you can buy it will be something special and in many ways it will be similar to the glass work that Mum made out of the shards of glass so maybe she was working in cahoots with pixie cat
I really hope the doctors can help with these migraines and headaches they really do take a toll. I am planning on working tomorrow and Friday but of course official migraine and computer screen don’t go together very well.
I took some pictures of some of the flowers in my garden today so I’ll drop those here.
Hope you are all feeling well and keeping cool it definitely sounds like it’s going to get hot. I am so glad I found this group and thank you all for listening.
Beki x
Hiya,
I knew Fathers Day was in June but didn’t know when and avoiding it for obvious reasons. Won’t be sending dad a card after his behaviour towards me. You are so lucky having a close and loving relationship with yours. It will be hard but you have some wonderful memories, I’m sure. It will be another ‘first time’ hurdle again. We seem to have a lot of them. But getting a card and some flowers for him will mark the occasion and you will feel close to him. Do you have pics to pop up like I did for mam? It helped me to be with her on the day. What flowers will you get? You could save some cash and just pinch potted plants off random doorsteps! Just read that in the neighbourhood online thing. Amazing what some people will do. No shame. I can imagine the creep doing that. And the thought of him baring all in the garden really does make me gag. I hate him that much. Hope the council takes him in hand.
It’s a shame your dancer friends are finishing for the summer. I know you’ll keep in touch but Sept is such a long way off. But then a new season will be something to look forward to in the Autumn.
I love the thought of our mams smiling down on us. Mam seems very far away at the mo and I think it’s because I’m not crying for her throughout the day like I was. I hope there really is a spiritual world beyond what we imagine. If not, what is the point in it all?
looking forward to the pics. I have some new flowers out so will post tomorrow. I never used my camera to record the garden like I am now. I think posting here really helps me focus and drives me forward. Such hard work but totally worth it, though I am always very miffed when I see Monty’s garden and then wonder why I bother at all!
Enjoy tomorrow and the weekend. Going to start cooling down from Sunday but still nice.
Lots of love xxx
Hiya 
It’s been about 20C up here today and maybe not as hot as down South but the shop has broken air conditioning and it’s melting!! Had customers even complaining and walking out because shop was so hot…:always feel like saying ‘you try working a delivery so stop your moaning’ 
x
Was doing interviews today and one of the candidates actually described the colleagues as ‘subordinates’ and said he knew he was intelligent and kept correcting people…I was like no bloody way are we hiring him x
So sleepy tonight but day off tomorrow 
x
Love to hear you so upbeat 
xx
Beautiful flowers. Did you know that blue and purples are best for bees? I didn’t. So exhausted after all the planting. A lot of my little plug plants have been eaten by massive slugs. So disappointed. Wondering if they’ll come back again. Just saying to Neil, when I see Monty’s garden I wonder why I even try. But then I enjoy it so much. Can’t imagine not. So pleased you are back out there.
Lots of love xxx
Such lovely flowers Beki x
Hope your headaches are sorted soon and I’m sure I read somewhere that peri menopause causes a lot of those symptoms but about 1000 more 
x
I’m sure your mug will look amazing with the gold and is believed that after being put back together it holds even more beauty than it did before x
Blessings and wishing you a speedy recovery from your migraines x
I definitely believe too that they are all keeping us going and giving us strength to keep moving forward x
Hope you had a nice chat with your friend tonight and that your UC meeting went well x
Least you’ll still be able to chat to your dancer friends when they are on their break. They certainly do seem to keep your spirits up.
Enjoy your show and look forward to hearing all about it xx
Hiya,
It’s going to get up to 32! I just can’t bear it. I need your mate’s jacuzzi! Though I can only imagine what that would do to the creep.
Can’t believe that bloke was serious about ‘subordinates’. Could it be that he just didn’t want the job? Hope you find someone nice. Just not pleasant if the peeps you work with aren’t on your level.
Enjoy your day off. You work so hard. Do something nice or nothing at all. Having a rest when you need it is just as good.
Had a bit of a tearful start to the day but I’m still quite perky. Strange. I keep wondering where grief has gone, ready to pounce when I’m least expecting it.
Neil was saying about Fathers Day. Wonder how dad will feel when he doesn’t get a card. He usually gets a power tool or something for the garden. I will be upset but am not responsible for his behaviour. Just bringing it up makes me upset for what mam had to put up with. I wish I could have made it easier for her. I was alwat=ys so busy I didn’t really see what was going on, but knew when they’d been fighting, which was often. Mam would give him the silent treatment for days and he’d be clueless as to what he’d done. Mam deserved so much more. Getting upset now so will stop there. Off to watch some tv and get the little Porsch in. She’s refusing to come in. I’ve popped the fairy lights on for her while she’s out there. So spoilt!
Lots of love xxx
Hi everyone, just been catching up on all your posts so much has happened in just a few days.
I’ve had a couple of really difficult days and when I’m in that frame of mind I can’t seem to function very well.
I don’t know if it was answer to prayer or coincidence, my friend messaged me at work today and asked me to go to the theatre with her tonight with some other friends. It was just the thing to lift me out my sad mood.
We went to see a comedy version of 39 Steps at the Mill Theatre in Sharnbrook, it was very good Neil, I think the laughter did me good. I hope you enjoy Back to the Future. Your such a regular in the theatre scene they know who you are now getting rewarded with upgrades.
I like Kinky Boots too, filmed in my home county the home of the shoe industry.
Suzanne and Nic, glad you liked Jurassic Park, I thinking if going Saturday, big step on my own.
Suzanne you make me feel old, my eldest granddaughter is nearly 18, I do have another granddaughter that is thirty, but I have to explain to everyone, our daughter used to foster and she was their first aged 16yrs when she came to them and she is now just part of our family. She has a little one of her own, so I’m now great grandma.
I can imagine the heat in your shop was oppressive today and only going to get worse.
My office was unbearable, especially with all the photocopiers going and laminating machine. I only have a fan and an open window to keep me cool. Really could do with air conditioning.
Can’t face food shopping on Friday in the heat so done an online Iceland shop this week.
I had to smile Tina at Zoe’s face when she was caught shredding her bed, as if to say it wasn’t me, just found it like this.
Sorry about your mug Beki, I’ve seen that Japanese art with gold glue on TV before. I’m sure it will still be special and look lovely when you have done it. Talking about parcels today had a leaflet from Royal Mail that the postman will pick your parcels up from your home, just have to book and pay online and they bring the printed label when they collect from your house. I hope your migraines get better soon. The heat is probably not helping. Nice flower pics.
So glad you enjoyed swimming with your niece and I hope you keep it up when she goes off to uni in the autumn. At least you know now your dad is horrible to all the family and not just you. Did I read your going to have a BBQ in your garden, will you invite the neighbour with the cat, he seems very nice and it’s good to have a friend close by.
I’m now going to bed, way past my normal bedtime of 10pm. Got to up at 6am for work.
Catch up again tomorrow, sending love to everyone.
Debbie X X
I was asking you Christine about the swimming, it was so late last night when I posted my brain not working well.
Hi Debbie
Great to see that you’ve been to the theatre. Isn’t it great to just be able to focus your mind on live performance even if just for a couple of hours or so . Does my mind wonders and keeps anxiety at bay too.
Brilliant that you managed to go.
I joke with some of my theatre friends and one or two front of house staff I know they must be getting sick of my ugly mug turning up everywhere . No seriously they love the support and appreciate it so much.
Will hopefully post some pics later.
Hope your day is as good as can be
Love and best wishes
Neil x
Hello to all.
Oh Suzanne you made my laugh a bit when you included me in the comment “Hello lovely ladies”, I’m not sure I qualify for either adjective right now but the sentiment is appreciated! Overcast here in Lancashire. I found I’d put on a stone in weight since January so having to hide myself under winter clothes at the moment when I go out!
Beki I’m sorry to hear you’ve been plagued with migraines. I’m not a headache person (not wanting to tempt fate). I do have occular migraines where you get the coloured zigzags at the side of the eyes but with no accompanying symptoms. Can’t imagine how bad it is having a migraine though. Hope things improve. Love the flowers.
I agree too Neil about looking older. I think the face is the first place to show emotional pain. A smile makes all the difference though and you are always smiling on your photos and you don’t look haggard. So maybe there’s some truth in it! Pardon me if that’s as bit personal!
Debbie I totally understand about the days you can’t function. You just feel wiped out emotionally. Like you’ve been asleep for 48hours but instead of feeling rejuvenated you just feel drained. Interesting to see your photo.
Hi Christine, my Nephew has just finished a three year sustainable design course at Falmouth Uni. Next month he is going to Australia for a year so won’t be sending him for a long time. My Niece moved down to Newquay and tattoos. She was up here this week and I bought her two lovely big candles as a birthday present but she was notably underwhelmed, what can you do. Hope you get all your repairs sorted as soon as possible then you can put them behind you and enjoy your garden.
Nic, hope you are ok Nic. I’ve scrolled a fair way up and can’t see any recent messages but my tablet often doesn’t display things in proper order. Hope things are ok with you and your two little ones.
Much love xx
The headache is sort of lingering and lots of tension in neck and shoulders adding to that.
Visual disturbance still there and I am wondering if stress and all has made my dormant uveitis flare up? It’s a swelling thing in the eye and you get lots of floaters etc. Have the doctors in the morning, will right a list of everything before I go. My friend made the receptionist book me a double appointment!
@nicnic you’ve been quiet, I know you were having a real rough patch so sending lots of hugs and hope you pop in soon x
Feel very nervous and shaky today, I think even subconsciously Thursdays were the last day I had with Mum, and it was a good and upbeat day, and Friday mornings are x weeks since she left. I don’t consciously make a note or keep counting but it is just there.
I have almost butterflies in my stomach something you’d usually associate with nervous excitement. Feels very odd
Beki x
Hi Tina
You stop being so hard on yourself…I can’t think of how much weight I’ve put on…I just keep putting on bigger clothes lol x
And you have literally just explained something that happened to me a couple of weeks ago…ocular migraine!! I had lunch one day at work…nothing unusual…then I went back to work and kept seeing like rainbow auras out of corner of one eye but no headache. It was just very disconcerting as never had one before ever. I didn’t know it had a name so thank you for unwittingly answering my unasked question lol x
How are you feeling in yourself this week? xx
With you both on the eating rubbish, so much easier than cooking a proper dinner for one. But the scales tell a different story.
It’s so hot outside thought I was going to melt at work, hope everyone is coping with the heat. X X
I got a load of Donald Russell ready meals that can be cooked from frozen. My appetite just keeps disappearing. The worst is when I do feel hungry but just can’t face the physical act of eating. And I’m a fatty!
Just had a massive sob in Mum’s room and a lot ‘why were you taken from us’.
think the Drs appt in the morning and not being taken by a regular member of my ‘circle of trust’ is weighing on me
Beki x
Deep breaths you will be ok. Just think this time tomorrow I will be back home and I did it. 
We’ve had rain and a couple of rumbles of thunder…been warm but not too bad up here today but hear tomorrow is meant to be a scorcher…so pleased to be on day off of the same x
Yeah I had a lovely shepherds pie and cauliflower for tea with a pile of garlic bread and tiramisu x I agree I just can’t be bothered by cooking but I’m also conscious of the price of heating an oven for just me so try to use either the microwave or halogen oven.
Hope you have a fan on your desk cause I didn’t even think about the heat that printers etc also cause x
Keep hydrated xx