Hi Becki,
Just trying to catch up with everyone. Have a blog out today in recycling old furniture. Here’s a link
Recycling Furniture (mrxstitch.com)
How is the tsunami? Great description. It really does come in waves and absolutely drowning. But I seem to be having a productive week. Been swimming every day alone and with my niece today. It’s just a matter of time before they move and she doesn’t get that I will be totally isolated apart from my therapist. Can’t do anything about it but if I force myself to swim everyday it will break up the time and will stop me becoming totally housebound. I was sorting my textiles in the loft and felt like I was back to being me again. Doesn’t last long. Get caught up in the moment and then wonder what the point of it is.
How is the back now? I’m quite worried about getting my test results back but trying not to. Have a telephone consult next week.
Think your 1 to 1 session in glass is a great idea. You could do an instagram thing, a how to do tutorial. How did your presentation go today? Whatever you do it’s better than not doing anything. I seem to stop and start and get lost in between. But your trip away might be a real boost. Have you tried Bachs Rescue Remedy? Doesn’t really work for my anxiety but it is popular.
Got the remainder of my free rocks today on the way back from swimming so that’s another thing completed. The garden is absolutely soaking so I can’t do anything until it dries up. Your heathers will be lovely. I did that but they all died. Very effective in white for winter. Will prob do winter pansies. Just don’t have any oomph and because I’ve been stuck in the house since the heatwave I feel really disconnected to the garden.
Be lovely to see your Grandad. Would he not have enjoyed the trip to Barcelona?
Your ladies group sounds very supportive and a great get together to boost morale. Your crochet poppies sound very effective. Crochet was one of the first things I learned. Haven’t done it in a while but will repair mams massive camping blanket. Bought the wools but was too busy with the garden. My niece will help me, unless she moves. I have lots of colour in my decor so it will go lovely with the theme.
Take care hun and keep working hard. It’s when we stand still that we are engulfed again.
LOts of love xxx
Thinking of you all this evening. Its certainly choking me up especially on the TV just now saying the Queen was not herself after her husband died. In some ways I can relate to that with Mum. Our Mums now welcoming Her Majesty through the gates of heaven . New PM and new Head of State within two days.
Lots of love to you all xx
Hi Debbie,
Catching up with everyone because I didn’t check in yesterday. Bet your first week back has been exhausting but you’ll have barely had time to think. Hope your photocopier gets sorted soon and things will return to running smoothly. I miss the hustle and bustle of work and commuting. Working from home with my textiles is a very intensive but isolating thing. It’s the connection to people, being part of a team, being appreciated I suppose that I miss. Bouncing off people, getting feedback. This year will whizz by and you’ll be retired sooner than you imagine. I remember the party we had for my mam. Makes me cry thinking of her. I miss her so much. It must break your heart walking through the door and wishing Doug was there to greet you. It doesn’t seem to get any easier.
Thank you so much for the pond info. I got the last of my ricks today on the way back from swimming so I’ll be ready to start designing the pond and then buying plants when the rain eases up. I bought my liner and pumps from Swell online so I’ll try them and look at Amazon too. I’ll refer back to your list. Great selection. I have 3 levels (dug it out myself) so will accommodate different plants. Haven’t seen many frogs this year. Noticed my little robins are back again now the weather is turning. Will start feeding them again soon. Thought I would have had my garden jobs finished by now and ready for Autumnal planting. It’s too wet out there to do anything at the mo. I’ve been out of action since the heatwave and after swimming need to sleep or rest.
Here’s a link to my blog today
Recycling Furniture (mrxstitch.com)
I was saying to Beki how connected I felt to my work when I was sorting out fabrics and projects ready in the loft. But then I wonder what the point of it? I used to be defined by work as an artist before mam and now it just doesn’t matter. I could sell my entire collection and it would make me upset because mam wouldn’t be here to see it.
I’m so upset about Queen Elizabeth. My niece texted me earlier. I didn’t know she had already passed this afternoon. It’s so sad. She was truly loved. I’m in bits. I’m absolutely sobbing. I was never a royal but mam was. She would be heartbroken.
Hi Neil,
I’m absolutely sobbing. Mam loved the Queen. She would be so upset. I hope our mams are there for her. It’s just so shocking. My niece texted me while I was posting to Debbie.
Hi Neil,
Thank you for your lovely concern as much appreciated and, despite the sad news of the Queen, feeling better.
Like you and probably us all I am not a fan of the monarchy but the Queen had class and respect and mum liked her and Harry so know she would be saddened to hear the news.
Just never thought there would be such a momentous occasion that I wouldn’t be able to tell her about in person. Like you said certainly choking me up too and getting so annoyed about all the jokes and disrespectful things going about because despite the fact she was royalty she was a mother, grandmother etc and people will be grieving and sad x
On a lighter note I am glad your counselling went well and have managed to move it to your Monday like before x I have my next session tomorrow and think we’ll have a bit to discuss but I like that and to see what I can learn about myself x
The costumes are gorgeous and always loved Sleeping Beauty. The dancers are al so graceful and petite but I know the training schedule is almost inhumane sometimes so admire their dedication x
Hope you continue to have a better couple of days and will check in soon x
Much love 
Hi Christine,
Was going to pop on here and see how you were as thought the news if the Queen would be very upsetting for you and us all as it’s just something I never thought I wouldn’t be able to talk to mum about.
I’m going to watch something on tv that has nothing to do with people passing cause I don’t want to go down that rabbit hole of despair again x
Please keep posting if you need/want company as know you will take it hard.
Much love 
It’s very sad, I know how she feels, to loose your soulmate is devastating. It’s something you never come to terms with. I’m just waiting for the time I can join Doug.
It’s also a sad reminder for all of you that have lost your mum’s.
She was the mother of our nation, and will be greatly missed. God Bless the Queen.
This is a beautiful idea…I lost my mom 2 weeks ago and as being cremated I have struggled with the thought of having nowhere to go to feel close to her…I have just been making a kind of shrine area for her with pictures and angels etc too in my living room which helps me a little I’m
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Hello Christine.
Just thought I’d see how you were as I know you’ll probably be affected with what has happened with the Queen.
I have just logged on to see I had an unfinished message to you that didn’t get sent so I have deleted and thought I’d send this shorter Hello instead.
It’s Mums birthday today so I am going to get some flowers shortly but keep remembering last year and with recent events everything seems like unreality.
Much love xx
Will catch up again soon
Welcome @Giblin88
Sorry you had to find us . With the news about the Queen I think it is making us feel even worse. This must feel so fresh and raw to you and it really is a slow process . I’m 9 months in and only seems like yesterday. Still have really bad days and have started another round of counselling.
You will find a lot of support here as we look out for each other and we understand .
Sending my best wishes
Neil.
Hi Tina
Thinking of you even more today on your Mum’s birthday. I know from experience how tough it is to get through the day. I’m sure your flowers will be lovely and that your Mum will be there with you in your heart. Makes things even tougher with the news about the Queen but she was 96 and had an amazing life .
Sending you big hugs today and hope you can get through the day the best that you can
Love and best wishes
Neil x
Hi Tina,
I didn’t know it was your mam’s birthday today. It will be so hard to get through. You’ll experience all the trauma of her passing like it is happening now. The sadness of the Queen makes mam real again. She loved the Queen and always celebrated every event with a party. My niece texted while I was posting to Debbie because I stopped watching the news and didn’t know how ill she was. I can’t stop sobbing for her and for mam. So much sadness. I’ll be thinking of you and your mam today. I just can’t stop crying. I posted on mam’s tribute site to let her know about the rainbow that came out when we got the news. What is the point of life if we just die? To have children who will die. I keep thinking of all the little corgi’s who will miss her. xxx
Phillip came to me today, and said it was time to go. I looked at him and smiled, and whispered that “I know” I then turned and looked behind me, and saw I was asleep. All my Family were around me, and I could hear them weep. I gently touched each shoulder, with Phillip by my side. Then I turned away and walked, with My Angel guide. Phillip held my hand, as he led the way, to a world where Kings and Queens, are Monarchs every day. I was given a crown to wear or a Halo known by some. The difference is up here, they are worn by everyone. I felt a sense of peace, my reign had seen its end. 70 years I had served my Country, as the people’s friend. Thank you for the years, for all your time and love. Now I am one of two again, in our Palace up above.
Hi Christine
Saw this lovely verse on social media this morning.
Had my UC appt earlier and they have their tributes up already x
Hi Suzanne,
I’m finding this truly devastating. The only person I want to talk to and see and hold is mam. She would be heartbroken. I have nobody to share my sorrow with. I texted my niece and sister (she will be in bits) up north but haven’t had anything back. The Queen has always been part of my life through mam. I have never followed politics but watched the speeches from Parliament and was so deeply touched by the love shown for Her.
The overwhelming sorrow for Charles as a son losing his mama is very real. I know he is trained but how he can perform today is beyond me. We are all a child of our parents. Life is so cruel and the sorrow relentless. I’m glad he has Camilla to comfort him.
I am so heartbroken again and just want the comfort of my mam. I feel like I want to go outside and walk in the woods but I can’t stop crying. I’m so claustrophobic at home and the creep is fiddling about outside. I can’t even cry in private. It was the same for mam. I’m really shocked at how this is affecting me. I think it is because She was so dear to mam.
Boris explained in his speech how familiar the Queen is to us all and our reaction to Her death is like that of a family member. He couldn’t refer to Her in the past tense.
I wasn’t prepared for this news or my rection. It’s like mam has left me again. It’s like She represents every Mother and Grandmother. Just so sad.
Hi Neil,
I completely thought of my mam’s age in comparison. I think everyone will. It is so utterly sad. I think our mams cherished The Queen because she represented them. They lived their lives alongside Her. I hope traditions of that generation will remain and not be lost with future generations. I feel completely lost.
Your counselling has perhaps come at a good time. We don’t yet understand the deep impact this will have on us.
Hi Debbie,
I was so shocked by the news of Our Queen and cannot stop crying and wanting my mam. Nobody in my family have contacted me. My niece told me of Her death by text but hasn’t replied to anything I’ve sent. I just want mam. She would be inconsolable. My sister up north will also be devastated but hasn’t reached out to me. I feel so completely alone.
I do hope our Heaven is real, in whatever reality that may be. I love that everyone is wearing halo’s, a heavenly crown. I just want to join my mam. I need her comfort and for me to able to just hold her and give her comfort. Just to be with her again.
God Bless all our loved ones. May we meet them again.
Hi Tina,
How are you getting through today? It feels like mam has just left me again.
Will you visit your mam at her grave? I want to go out but can’t stop balling my eyes out. It’s the strangest feeling to feel so close and be devastated by someone I don’t know personally and has always been relevant to me through mam because she truly loved Her.
Thinking of you and your mam today with love xxx
Hi Giblin,
I’m so sorry that you find yourself here with us but I’m glad the shrine can give you a focus to create a quiet place in which to be with your mam. The devastating news of The Queen has knocked me for six. It’s like my mam has just left me again. She loved The Queen and that is why I am so upset I think.
Wishing you love and I hope you will visit us for comfort and a voice when you need to express your grief. It’s a horrific journey. It will be a year in November for me and I don’t know how I have endured it this far.
Couldn’t see your images. I drag mine in. Looking forward to seeing them.
Lots of love xxx
Hi Christine
Sending an extra large hug and will answer the message you wrote me properly soon. It’s been an utter shitty week and like you think the Queen’s passing is just bringing up a lot of emotions for us all.
I am in discomfort where my gallbladder was, the docs want to redo a urine test and I like you I just want my mum. Doesn’t matter how old you are when you feel ill you want your Mum.
Just had a Sue Ryder online counselling session so also feel quite raw. Going to make a cuppa and just decompress for a moment. Join me for a virtual cuppa?
Beki x