At times we can forget we go out meet friends have a couple of drinks and feel a bit normal then come home to an empty house with nobody to talk about your day its a Saturday night when before he died youd talk listen to music have a laugh and enjoy each other’s company now I’m here on my own with the dog having a glass of wine and crying life is so shit at times sorry i want to be more positive but I’m so sad
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That’s how I feel too. I met up with people and do things but nothing has much meaning anymore.
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What do we do when its so overwhelming and sad and lonely
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I’m having such a bad night don’t want to tell my family and friends cause they think I’m doing so well but I’m not
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Sending a big hug xx
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Thankyou rose
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I know exactly how you feel. Home used to feel so warm and homely but now just feels like a concrete box full of empty dreams.
I’ve described it to people who luckily don’t understand that it’s like that feeling when you pull up outside the house after being on holiday and think “ahhh, home sweet home”. That disappears completely in a moment, and I can’t ever see it coming back properly .
Hope you’re ok. Be gentle to yourself and do anything that might sooth your soul a little - a book, a bath, a new tv series…whatever works. One day at a time x
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My house us no longer a home its somewhere I come too. Its somewhere on a goid day i get a vistor. But its not a home no more. Its empty quiet and lonely. I have never been a jealous person but i am now. I am jealous of all the couples . They have what I should have my husband. Its 5 weeks tomorrow and its pure hell. I want my life back . Is there any hope for the future will I ever have a sense of belonging to feel warmth hope and happiness. I do t think I ever will. Love Jo xxxx
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sending lots of love and hugs your way, the sad thing is, we all get you! All going through the same emotions and feelings, surely it gets easier and less painful? x
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I’m 3 months and yes it gets a bit easier in the early days you can hardly function its an effort to make bed or hoover round but ive found gradually you can function and smile but still have complete meltdowns like i had last night where it was unbearable but today ive been up and out with the dog and then clean the house from top to bottom in the early days couldn’t of done that so yes it does get a bit easier for me anyway but everyone is different take the good days and the bad but we’ve all got to support each other which we do
Deb
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Morning i really hope i get to the place you are now Debrat, at the moment i dont thi k i ever will 5 weeks today he was still here. I cant invisage ever feeling normal again. I have no intrest in anything . All i do is walk around crying. Xxx
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Its very difficult in the early days your stomach is constantly in knots amd you can’t believe what you had and now thats gone your future everything but it does get a little bit easier believe me danny was the love of my life he was 63 when he died we were together over 40 years we first met when we were 14 he was fine one minute and died of a heart attack the next but believe me it does get a bit better you learn to live with the new life try and do little things each day and that way you feel your accomplish something
Debbie x
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Ty Debs for you kind words i am hoping with all my heart you are right. Today is another bad day . I miss him more than i could ever say. I am so very lost and lonely. Xxx
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Sometimes we need to tell people. They don’t know what to do. I’m bad for not doing that but when I do they are supportive and say I appeared to be doing well. They had no idea I was struggling.
I woke up positive this morning got pressure washer out- husbands toy- thinking I’ll clean block paving how difficult can it be- an hour later drenched I cannot get hose connected right. If John had been here he’d have sorted and we’d have laughed. Just want to cry . Will perk myself up though , swallow pride and then ask for help.
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Yep Cookie we dont realise how much we depened on them. Its all the daft small stuff. I have never felt so empty and lonely. Sending hugs Jo xxxx
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You no what were all stranger than we think we are yes i agree when things don’t work its so frustrating but people will always help Sundays are a bad day as well thats why i keep that day for housework etc i always found going back to work only a say an half helped didn’t remind me of danny and had to concentrate and i jo it sounds awful but at times we need a break from thinking of them constantly going over and over the day he died our brain needs a break even just for minutes at a time if that makes sense xx
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Debrat ty I wish I could work but I am agrophobic I only go out in a little area close to home. Gra use to take me for drives around and it was safe with him. Now I sit here most days alone. I am tired but cant sleep I hope one day I can be happier than I am now I have no friends I can just pick up the phone too. I miss the human connection. I lost my only good friend who i had nevef met who was agrophobic like me and lived in London the beginning of the year but we would speakcevery day sometimes 2 or 3 times . Now i dont even have her. Yes its great on here but i need to hear human voices if that makes sense. Xxx
I understand my cousin is agoraphobic too she won’t go on buses she gets around if she manages to get a lift it must be so difficult and lonely its bad enough losing your partner but then not be able to get out is there nobody around you neighbours or family that understand your situation or could your gp maybe advise you if there is help out there anytime you need to chat msg me wish i could do more xx
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It does make sense grief is so tiring we do have to forget at times which then hits hard when you remember again. But I don’t ever want not to remember him .
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I think we are all in the same position. Weekends I find are the worst. No one to talk to when you get home from shopping. I find myself crying at the most strange times. Maybe tuning into netflix and seeing movies we shared together, maybe a song on the radio. And when I’m out thinking I can see Kris in the distance carrying shopping. Heartbreaking. It’s 5 months now and still very raw. Only people that are grieving and have list a loved one fully understands. I’m scattering my husbands Ashes in September so hopefully when putting Kris to rest I will feel better:pray:
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