End my life or keep going

The Void in my life, I suffer pain every minute of every day.

I held your hand, once warm and strong,
But now you’re gone, where do I belong?
The echoes of your laughter fade,
A shadow falls where light once played.

The days stretch long, the nights are cruel,
Grief’s silent weight, a merciless rule.
I reach for you in empty air,
To find only memories lingering there.

Your smile, your voice, a fleeting trace,
The love we shared, time can’t erase.
But loss has carved a hollow space,
Where dreams collapse and tears embrace.

The world goes on, a spinning wheel,
While I’m trapped within the ache I feel.
How does one mend a heart so torn,
When hope itself seems bruised and worn?

Yet in the quiet, your whispers stay,
Guiding me gently through each gray day.
Though you’ve left, your love remains,
A balm for my soul amidst the pains.

So I carry on, though broken, bent,
With the memory of a life well-spent.
For even in sorrow, your light will shine,
Forever in my heart, always divine.

1 Like

Hello @BrokenDoll,

I’m so sorry to hear about your hubby. It sounds like you’re looking for support and I’m glad that you’ve been able to share how you’re feeling with us. It is very normal for people who are grieving to feel a bit lost and not know where to start.

We know that a lot of people experience suicidal thoughts when they are grieving, and it is often about wanting the person who has died back or life to go back to how we know it. We have a video about it here which you might find helpful:

https://griefguide.sueryder.org/support/suicide

There is lots of other support out there, and I would really encourage you to reach out and speak to someone about how you are feeling.

  • If these thoughts of suicide become overwhelming, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.

  • You can call 111 and choose the mental health option to speak to a trained mental health professional (England, Scotland and Wales only)

  • Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.

  • Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text REMEDY to 85258 and talk to them about anything.

  • You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline.

  • Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: sueryder.org/counselling.

You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.

I hope that you and anyone else who is struggling with thoughts of not wanting to go on find these resources helpful. You are important and deserve care and support.

@Julie333, I really hope you’re okay and being looked after too. :blue_heart:

Take care,
Seaneen

1 Like

Hi all that have replied to my story and your input to everyone’s pain and suffering.

There are plenty of support networks out there, however it’s not easy to find it and then get it…

Samaritans are there 24/7

However with a bit of work there’s lots of other support.

Lots of love and here is a huge to support you now.

Lots of luck

I’ve lost my wife, my love, and the will to continue.

This has been a cruel week—filled with endless dark moments. The darkness seems to hunt me, creeping closer with each breath I take.

I no longer have the strength to fight. The pain and suffering have grown too strong, consuming whatever light was left within me.

Now, I find myself here in the woods. The cold wraps itself around me like an old friend. The mist is thick, the silence heavy, yet I feel at home in this empty, desolate place.

I feel ready—ready to step onto this lonely, dark path. My love, my darling, my everything… if you can hear me, know that I’ve missed you every moment since you left. I am broken, shattered without you.

This is my goodbye to you, my wife, my heart, my soul. I will walk this dark path and find you again in the beyond.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by pain, I urge you to reach out for help—talk to a trusted friend, a counselor, or even a crisis line. You don’t have to carry this burden alone.

I am alone but feel happy here in the dark lonely woods. The moon is shining bright and the animals are here, the owls in the tree, the fox :fox_face: looking at me, the place is peaceful.

I am sending you love, hope, support, hugs :hugs: and your not alone in your grieving. Plenty of help out there you just need to look for it…

I am feeling the endless pain of every day. I wish I could turn back time just for one more chance to save my wife…I am sorry I was not there I am sorry I couldn’t save you…

Missing you.
Hopefully hold you soon.

2 Likes

Del you never have too say goodbye ever, life together you have known will be forever, forever in your beautiful places just lovely peace for both of you, I get where you are it’s lovely the memories it’s hard feeling left behind, I’m sure they r with us, guiding us on, please call Samaritans if it gets too much but we all have bad moments and want to seek support, Samaritans have been a saving space :heart:

2 Likes

Thanks for your support and kindness

Hi everyone.

Just checking in with you all.

Hopefully your all ok and doing better.

Lots of love and hugs and kisses.

I am just going minutes by minute day by day…

Thanks :pray::+1::pray::+1: hopefully I here from you all …

1 Like