That’s it exactly Deb. I know it’s hard to be around someone who’s grieving, but ask me what I need! X
5 Likes
People dont though do they ? They don’t ask what you need because they are too selfish … its a terrible world we have to grieve in these days … its all about me, me , me … x
2 Likes
I agree with the sentiments here. My partner died suddenly with a heart attack 12 weeks today. We were both enjoying his retirement and had a lot of things to do in the future. He spoiled me . All that is gone now.
I hate waking up in the morning. I have nothing to look forward to. The days are so long and lonely.
10 Likes
I agree with you Paula. 12 weeks is no time at all when the loss is so deep. I bought a faux fur duvet cover and fleece fitted sheet, sounds daft but it beats getting into a cold bed at night.
2 Likes
I think everyone just wants me to be okay, and they think talking about my husband will upset me. I feel like I don’t want to burden anyone with my thoughts x
4 Likes
That sounds great Ali66. I must look out for a set x
1 Like
Yeh but its not upsetting is it ? Its comforting talking about them ! Its very silly for people to just expect you to never think about them again. As if …
2 Likes
I find the mornings the hardest tbh … because sometimes i forget hes not here … even though im 11 months into this 
x
4 Likes
I talk to David every day and even when i go out for walks. I come home and the quiet of the house make me feel miserable all over again
5 Likes
Yeh i give his picture a kiss every night , write to him in my journal … i think being by yourself in the house is the worst thing . That’s when u really miss them … xxx
4 Likes
It’s upsetting, but it helps me to talk about him, that’s all we have left, after all, the memories x
5 Likes
Yes, I do the same with a picture of my wife. Every morning as well. I also remind our two cats that their mummy is keeping an eye on them so they better behave!
But I find it very difficult to talk about Christine to anyone. I just find it so painful that it will reduce me to weeping very quickly.
6 Likes
I like to remember happy things about him but i know what you mean - sometimes its upsetting but other times its joyful to think of good things about them and if you wanna talk about them people should listen !!! x
4 Likes
That’s the thing about this grief, there’s no step by step guide, if only there was. I hoped having my husband’s ashes might give me a tiny bit of peace, but instead it breaks my heart. I talk to the dog about her daddy, Jerry
6 Likes
Wifey1 no your not being selfish.i feel exactly the same way as you. A so called friend who is no longer a friend said sues passed away and you should be moving on and let her die also said she was sick of seeing my grief and photos of sue on Facebook and my answer was get out of my life for good and never contact me again in any way shape or form
8 Likes
That is absolutely disgusting! I said to someone yesterday when their time comes and they lose someone they love as much as we loved our partners they might then be able to understand and feel the pain we do. I get it’s hard to put yourself in a position you haven’t been but some people are just cruel and selfish. Thank goodness not everyone is and we travel this path with others on here.
5 Likes
Someone told me that my grief showed what a strong bond I had with my husband. Obviously, it was the same for you and your wife. You do what feels right, and well done for getting rid of that idiot!
7 Likes
Dont blame you ! xx
2 Likes
They have no idea what you are going through. Someone meaning well suggested doing voluntary work. But how am I supposed to do that when there are days I cant even walk the dog without crying.
4 Likes
Exactly !!! Silly people they are ! I do volunteering once a month for a few hours, which i have done for years !.. Been tough enough doing that ! At last meeting i was in floods of tears … nearly went home but braved it out people just say stupid things ! Just putting one foot in front of the other can be hard some days cant it ? Xx
4 Likes