Feel so lost without you đź’”

I’m the only one in my family who has lost a partner. It all happened so suddenly and unexpectedly. The grief I carry from him and the trauma from that day is awful. None of my friends or family understand me and what I’m going through and will all say “you will move on your young” (I’m 27). The pain never gets any easier. He was my bestfriend and soulmate. We literally done everything together including work and living. It’s been a year now and doesn’t feel like it’s getting easier.

7 Likes

Hi @Jasminl1
How awful for you so young and losing your love. My heart goes out to you. I thought it unfair to lose my husband aged 60 but so grateful I had almost 29 years of marriage with him.

You know at least that you have people here who do understand the enormity of this loss.
Hugs xxx

5 Likes

I feel your pain mu husband died suddenly on 21st Jan , he was 42 and died in his sleep, i am so raw with emotion its unreal, i too feel lost and empty and want him back . Im sick of crying for him and wsiting for him , i too did everything with him , i married him when i was 18 and we had 25 years together and then he is just gone. He was not ill he wrnt to sleep and a heart attack and died suddenly

5 Likes

Feeling for you @Taz21. That must have been such a shock for you and so recent I’m sure it won’t seem real for quite some time.

Try not to expect too much of yourself but do whatever feels right to you. I do hope you have support around you as it helps such a lot.
Sending you love
Karen xxx

4 Likes

My partner woke up fine and after an hour went to the bathroom and had a heart attack in there. He was fit and healthy and that’s what hurts the most. I’m so sorry to hear that of your husband. Hope you’re doing okay? I try and live each day for Sam and do things that he loved to do

5 Likes

no one can ever prepare you for the sense of loss that comes with losing a partner. I was with my wife for nearly 30 years and it feels like I have lost part of myself and been put into irtual solitary confinement all at one time. I know my wife would want me to carry on with my life and I’m sre your partner would feel the same. It would be a terrible waste of all you have done together and built together. Remember he is reponsible for part of who you are now. I know how raw the feelings can be, my wife passed about7 months ago and I really feel alone in the world. It does help to come on here and talk to people who are having the same struggle. Please keep coming back and taking whatever you can from this site.

7 Likes

Sending you love and support.

My situation similar am 38 and lost my partner a year ago tomorrow he was 36 we was together 18 years and his death was sudden too.

An same no one knows what its like to lose partner, ive had the same resonse at times saying times a healer you have plenty of time to find someone else, one day someone said would you have any more children i was like are you joking me. People dont understand. I dont want anyone else.

Giving you a big hug xxx

4 Likes

I just dont understand how we are supposed to move on with our lives. My Husband was my life.
Im sorry for everyone treading this horrible path.

3 Likes

I know how you are feeling, lost my wife in 2020 getting towards what would have been her 69th birthday on March 10th. I lost her on 31st of March so a big, horrible month for me coming up. I’m still lost and alone as we also always did everything together. Take care and whatever you feel, your posts will be welcomed and answered. I know this for a fact because my posts have always been met with compassion by people who know what you’re going through x

3 Likes

Thank you so much. Really appreciate it. I’m glad I can talk to people on here who understands what it feels like. The first of any anniversaries was hard, especially his 1 year anniversary. Thankyou all so much

2 Likes

That’s exactly what I say. Sam was my everything and can not think of anything worse than moving on. He will forever be my partner even if he isn’t here

4 Likes

Similar situation to others here. Bri passed away, cardiac arrest, very sudden and unexpected having previously been running and doing triathlons. He was only 47, im only 48. Bri was my first, my last my everything, we loved dancing to that Barry White song. I just feel so robbed and sad and miss him so much.
Big hugs to everyone.

4 Likes

I feel your pain. My partner went out with his friends on a bike ride, like he did every Sunday, but just before the end of the ride he had cardiac failure and died instantly. That was the 29th of January 2023.
It’s been incredibly difficult, the worst pain I have ever felt. Everyday I just want him to come home. We had 16yrs and 3 months together , he was 49! He was in the prime of his life, he was the healthiest he had ever been, he’d just got the job of his dreams and was so excited about it. We were doing the house and garden up and everything was so good. He didn’t complain if feeling ill, had been laughing and enjoying his ride and it’s like he was just switched off and just like that, my life as I knew it has changed beyond all comprehension.
How do I live without him, I don’t want to live without him. 9 weeks tomorrow! But I have got this far, I am in a different place than 9 weeks ago. The funeral was hard but I got through it. Friends and family have been amazing and every day I channel what he would want for me and what would he do? Life is tough but I’m doing it everyday, I didn’t think I’d get through 9 weeks but I have. Day at a time, small steps !

5 Likes

Ali29
I feel your pain and i am so sorry for your loss, my husband passed away on 21st Jan 23 in his sleep. He too was a fit and healthy 43 year old. I think im still in shock and as every day is passing i feel the pain is a little more managable. Im taking one hour at a time .

2 Likes

@Ali29
So sorry for the loss you are dealing with. The suddenness of it as well as the loss itself must be so hard to come to terms with. My fit and well husband went out to play his usual weekly football game and never came home. He was older than your husband but still young at 60.

I am like you and very determined to do him proud and look after all that mattered to him and I WILL NOT let grief win and take my life and my daughters’ too.
Keep checking in here and posting as you feel the need. You are amongst people who understand.
Hugs
Karen xxx

2 Likes

I’m sorry for your loss too. It’s so hard isn’t it. It seems not so long ago and then feels like an eternity. So many people have reached out but it doesn’t make a difference, he’s still gonna and still not coming back.
I believed when people died, you would feel their presence but I don’t at all and that hurts. Rich always thought when we died, that was it, no after life, we just go and maybe that’s true as I don’t feel him around me at all. But on the positive side, I am better now than at the beginning. Just got to keep moving forward. I hope your days are not too difficult, well at least today.

2 Likes

Thank you for your kind words. 60 is definitely young! My man was such a fun, positive ball of energy, who lived life to the full, loved by me and so many! It’s tragic that he lost his life, he had such a full life to live. I owe it to him to live the life he can’t. Some days that’s really tough to do!
Ali

2 Likes

@Taz21 and @Ali29 I am so sorry for your loss, it is so unfair they were taken far too young. The suddeness makes it even more difficult to come to terms with. My husband suddenly passed away in January, he had been fighting a chest infection for a couple of days and was on antibiotics, he was still working, but he suddenly took ill during the night and suddenly went into septic shock, he lost conscious and never really came round. He died 8 hours later. I did have the chance to be with him when he died with my 3 children, I am so grateful for that. I also want to try and find my way and do him proud, Even though he is gone, I talk about him all the time and my family and friends are happy to share in the memories and hear me speak. This keeps him alive in our thoughts. I know others on this site others are not so lucky to have good friends and close family, I do count my blessings. We all walk this path together, some are further along but we all do understand. With love xxx

2 Likes

I’m only 38 too and my boyfriend of 17 years died suddenly on Wednesday. I’m so shocked to be in this situation at this age. Life is so cruel sometimes :sob:

2 Likes

Yes, I am very lucky to have friends and family that are so supportive and really do let me grieve and talk. It’s a mind field of emotions. Everyone’s loss is terrible and I feel for everyone. It’s one of those things that unless you experience it, you’ll never understand it!