It appears there are lots of others with unexpected sudden deaths I previously thought most people dragged on for weeks or months in hospital but not the case.
Looking back for my wife it was instantaneous, ok for those who pass nightmare for those left.
No time or chance to say all the things you would have wanted to, but she knew there things anyway, so if I had to choose I would pick to go the same way, in many years time but who knows when my time is up I will get the calling, and then we will meet again.
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LynT,
I am convinced that the speed of the bereavement has presented myself with additional challenges like we never had a real chance to say good by.
However I now know eventually I will be ok still mis her desperately but ok
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Just 5 mins would have been nice but not if she was in pane and knew what was happening.
I will stick with what happened be can not change anything now anyway
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Very true neither could i
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Hello my grieving friends.
Iâm so sorry for all of you that experienced such sudden deaths of your husbands and wives. It must be truly horrific.
My husband was poorly for quite a few years , sometimes very poorly indeed.
His last illness was rapid, and he died at home while recieving end of life care.
However it was still a massive shock when it happened.
And itâs not the case to assume you can say goodbyes if you know someone is very ill.
Why on earth would I have wanted to say âgood byeâ while he was still alive. So I didnât, we hung on to every moment of life.
I donât mean to cause offence to any of your very legitimate feelings, I suppose what Iâm saying is donât get hung up on not saying goodbye⌠Because if youâd been in my place you still might not have said it.
Itâs 2 years 3 months for me. Nothing is any easier. Iâm actually finding it all much harder.
Fewer and fewer people care or understand. And no one understands why I am just so sad all the time.
Christmas is a minefield. You must all just do what is best for you. If you do go out to restaurants or houses, let others know before that you might have to leave if you become to overwhelmed, and that you trust they can respect that.
Love , hugs and strength to you all 
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Cathphil
You are correct I never could have said goodbye until after she passed, but I could and would have thanked her for all she did for me and our family over the 38 years.
But I guess she would have known.
I will just have to wait a little longer to thank her in person what ever form that is in.
But I know I will see her again itâs all that oh reps me going now so it must be correct
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Would it be troublesome for you to send me the information too please. Iâm 19 months in on this horrible journey and I canât think of any happy memories. I donât know if itâs because I still do not have any type of closure, as my husbands sudden traumatic death is still being investigated. But I need to do something positive to help x