Hi I have only just been sign posted to this site please forgive me if I don’t get it right. Really need help at the moment
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Hi
Welcome, sorry that you are in grief , this is a safe place to express your feelings.
So, just say how you are feeling and I am sure all of us here can understand. We are all in this boat together.
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Than q I suffer depression from time to time but this is han horrendous time for me
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Yes it is and some days it will feel so very overwhelming. Other days better. Just be kind to yourself, distraction is helpful, staying busy but not tiring yourself too much. It takes a long while to process all that happened. Don’t expect too much of yourself, a day at a time is enough.
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Since my mum died I have no feelings for my son ,grandson and granddaughter Jacob is 5 and I loved him so much and Lottie is5 months and I darent meet her . My mum and I fell out in 2019 after a holiday. I did try to reach out to her but she just slammed the phone down on me . I saw my son yesterday and felt awful because of the way I feel. He knows I get depression and is aware it affects my feelings but hei haven’t told him the extent of it. I apologise if this has already being posted am new to this and very anxious
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4 days ago I posted a message about me having no feelings for my son and grandchildren since my mum died 8 months ago …is there any 1 out there that could shed some light on this because am beginning to feel that I will never feel the same again really desperate …all my GP has said is either ring Samaritans or go to A&E
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Hi, I read your post and totally know how you feel. I feel numb inside after recently losing my sister and am feeling nothing at the moment for anyone including my son and granddaughter.
I went to see my GP who gave me tablets for depression which aren’t helping yet but maybe you need to go back to your doctor again for help. Please talk to someone, I know how desperate you feel and I wish I could offer more support/advice other than you are not alone in your feelings x
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Thanq you are the first person to get where I,m coming from , I haven’t dare meet t my 5 month old granddaughter and that’s awful . This is really affecting my life . How are you coping ?
I did go back to my GP about changing anti depressants but he’s not keen to do that , I do suffer depression and usually there is a trigger
I am so sorry that you are going through this, I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. Im not really coping well if Im honest, I just take it hour by hour. I try so hard to be positive as I feel like Im dragging everyone down but I can’t pull myself out of this black hole.
My son visits with my granddaughter & I pretend Im fine but really I just want the world to go away. Next minute Im crying and feel so desperately lonely.
Im hoping the medication kicks in soon, maybe you should insist your GP changes yours. I found some breathing exercises online that help when the panic takes over. I don’t know how you feel about that but it calms me even if its only for a few minutes.
Jan x
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At least you are seeing your family , I can’t bear to see mine. My son came over to do a mend my bathroom light . Afterwards I was sitting on the sofa just chatting to him but I felt nothing . He’s not too good at moment due to having a bowel operation just before Xmas ( he has Crohn’s) just feel like I,m a horrible mother and nanny. I went to Mind today was in tears. , Really nice people , Hopefully going to get some counseling.
I hope we can both find some kind of peace xx
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You are not a horrible mother or nanny you are grieving. I know its horrible, I wish we both had a button to switch off and go back to normal. It must have been hard today but its a step in the right direction and I hope it helps you.
I don’t think either of us are going to get a quick fix but please keep trying, we have to.
Message me any time, its helping me to know Im not alone feeling like this x
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Than q same goes for you … … anytime , take care x
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Hi am having an awful time at the moment and have contacted Mind about getting some grief counselling . I went to a general group meeting by it it wasn’t for me , no disrespect but the other people there had different problems to mine and they were there to plan activities for the next 6 months . I was very weepy but tried not to show. The lady taking the group saw me afterwards and long story short I have an appointment for grief counselling assesment on 8th Feb. I am not coping at all with how I feel and don’t know how I manage to get thru the day . 1 day last week I had a melt down and my friend came over to calm me down. All this is too much for me. I contact my son every day but am just going thru the motions . Sorry I just needed to talk to someone. How are you coping ?
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Im sorry to hear your feeling so bad, your doing everything you possibly can to get help. I only manage by distracting myself, if I sit in the house I drive myself crazy so I’ll go for a walk or visit a friend just so Im not thinking too much.
Keep in touch daily with your son even if its small talk, does he know how bad you really are? My son knows something is wrong but I cant tell him how I really feel.
Just take it hour by hour, dont even think about tomorrow, ring your friend again if you can dont be alone.
I wish I could help I really do but keep going its all we can do for now x
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Thanq. I do contact my son at home quite a lot as he’s still off work at the moment . I txt him this morning for help with my vaccume cleaner the brushes aren’t turning so it’s not picking up it’s not something obvious like tangled hair I googled and all it said was it may want oiling but no other instructions . My son just said he didn’t know . Just feel like everything is against Mr at moment. The l small stuff turns into big stuff .
I have been in contact with Mind and have a grief counselling assessment appointment on 8th Feb and already am convinced I won’t be suitable. Feel really distressed and sometimes can’t stop crying .
It really is an awkward conversation talking to your son about stuff like this isn’t it ? and my son isn’t the world’s best at keeping on contact even when am well. They have their own lives at the end of the day don’t they ? It’s quite miserable outside today so am just having a hot chocolate then may ring my friend hope your day gets better
Hot chocolate & a chat with a friend sounds good to me! Im painting a door at the moment, its just giving me something to concentrate on. I know what you mean about your son having his own life, I feel guilty at times asking my son and daughter in law for help. I feel like they have enough on their plate without worrying about me so I try not to bother them too much.
I read a lot too to take my mind of everything, doesn’t always work but again it stops me getting anxious. Keep positive about the counselling appointment, anything is worth a go.
Hope you manage to relax a bit, deep breaths when you feel distressed x
Just desperate for reassurance that my feelings for my son and grandchildren will become back 
I know, I believe one day they will return for us both x
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