I totally agree with you on that!I struggle to go to supermarkets and into town where it’s a Christmas overload when I used love it.I can’t have the radio on in case I hear Slade singing Merry Christmas everybody,and Rob would sing it at the top of his voice!I’ll get through it,we’ll all get through it one way or another x
1 Like
Hi Jill, Yes we will learn to get through it one way or another. We will learn to remember with love and happiness and not this sadness that is overwhelming. We will learn to listen to their favourite music.
My father was a great music fan but it was Bing Crosby, Nat King Cole, Perry Como. Now I can listen to them and remember him and it brings me joy.
xxxxx
Good morning everyone. Well today is bright and sunny.Im off work with a horrible head cold and yesterday it was dark outside and I felt so down.On top of feeling so unwell and just couldn’t stop crying thinking about my David and how he won’t be with us this Christmas.Its my first without him(although last Christmas he was not too well).I suppose I was feeling a bit sorry for myself.Anyway I have lots of things planned on the run up to Christmas with my lovely family and friends.Thinking of you all at this time.Jeanette.x
Couldn’t agree more. First year walking past both Mum and Dad cards. Only tried one card shop and cried walking out. No cards for family this year!
Hi everyone. Well this is will be my third Xmas since my Annie passed away. I trimmed up the first Xmas without her, as i new she would want me to, wasnt going to at first, but, on dwelling on it a while, thought , No, this is not what she would want, she would want Xmas to carry on, if anything, for the the young Grandchildren. I mean, how long would one carry on, not celebrating Xmas? after all, its the celebration of the birth of Christ. Off course, Xmas is never same now, and never will be, I choose to spend most of Xmas day on my own, even though i get invites. My own company, with my own memories, usually go visit her at cemetery for a chat, before a nice walk across the Plains, ending up at daughters for refreshments. This is it…this is life now, not what i would ever want, but, until that day we meet up again, one has to carry on as best as can… I wish everyone a happy, as one can be, Xmas. …John
2 Likes
John a happy Christmas to you too. God bless and take care. X
1 Like
Hi John, your day sound very similar to what mine will be like. I will visit the cemetery with fresh flowers then a long walk with the dogs. Walking I find very therapeutic. I will then go to family for dinner and get back home, hopefully in daylight to walk my dogs again. My evening will be alone but I don’t think I mind that. You are right. Our own memories and own company. Christmas will never be the same again.
xxxx
1 Like
Hi Anne Sorry to hear your sad loss. I lost my Mick in January. I live alone and have no family. Like you I dread Christmas as Mick loved Christmas and we always had a lovely time together. If it wasnt for my friends I wouldnt be here today. I hate this lonely life like you. It is a little better now than it was at the beginning but I still hate this life and wonder if it will ever get better. I shall be on my own Christmas night and every night and really dreading New Years Eve. This web site is so comforting as you can write down how you feel and no body judges you. Also it helps to know there are others out there who feel just like you. Keep messaging be strong Love Sue
Thanks Theresa and Pattidot. Just remember, with all the hype, it’s really only one day, time moves on. I already have Daff buds showing in the garden, and the snowdrops are showing through. I for one, are looking forward to Spring. Birds singing, new born lambs, young birds coming to the table. Yep, much to look forward to… in the meantime, get through Xmas as best as can, and think ahead…John.x
John, please stay with this forum as you are an inspiration. I love nature and all that you say is indeed something to look forward to. Our loss will cripple us at times but we have to get through each day and try to see the natural beauty we are surrounded with. Your so right it is only a day, that probably holds many memories for many of us but we can get through it and look for that light that so many of us search for,
God Bless and thankyou
Pat xxx
Hi Pat, Theresa, guys…Well its almost here. Lets do this! Lets get through this day as best as we possibly can. Im sure our loved ones would want us to, Remember, its just a day. Treat yourself to something nice, extra mince pies (Diet can wait!) glass or two of wine, put your partners photos around the room, to include them in your day. Light them a candle. Make some time to smile and remember Christmas`s past. Watch a film, or go out for a stroll, (after watching the Queens speech of course) Its not going to be easy by any means, nothing can compensate for our loved one, But they will/would be proud of us …Catch ya later…Johnx
1 Like
Perfect words John.
I think my mum would/ will be proud of me for marking the day in a small way but also pleased I wasn’t putting pressure on to be happy and do all the fakeness of christmas too.
I’ll be lighting a sparkler for her in the morning, a new tradition as well as upholding a couple of our old ones.
Also thank you for using would/ will. I think I shall adopt that on here.
Some excellent advice John. I just hope family don’t take exception when I light a candle at the dinner table. I shall go for a long walk with the dogs in the morning as the sun will be shining apparently, according to the weather report. I will smile at other walkers and wish them a Merry Christmas then go and have a chat with Brian where his ashes were scattered and put fresh flowers, then drive to family for dinner. Inside I will be broken but make sure the outside of me will be coping and yes with that smile.
Pat xxx.
I will raise a glass to all absent friends.I know they’ll all be watching.x
I will join you in that Jill, and wish everyone here a peaceful Christmas, and thank you everyone for their posts that have comforted me, inspired me and encouraged me on this never ending journey we are all taking, reading these posts over the last year both positive and negative meant that whatever I was feeling there was always someone else there feeling the same, so I never felt alone take care everyone Jan x
It’s a long road but it does come to an end when we are reunited with our loved ones.That might seem morbid I’m sorry but it’s true. X
I too lost Adrian, but in January. I have had my birthday, like you and his 60th. A girl at work said I was bah humbug - I wanted to punch her.
Most people have been kind, but Christmas hype starts August I think.
I will get through the day, as will we all. But sometimes I really dont want too. Take care x
I will mark the day by repeating the walk John and I did last year along the promenade on the beach and sitting on the same bench watching the children out with their new scooters/tricycles etc. I will talk to John and probably shed many tears but then I will go to friends for lunch and much needed company. Wishing everyone a peaceful Christmas and thank you for all your tips on how to get through. Take care . x
Hello ladies, Well, Christmas day is near over, hope all went as well as it could for you. After visiting my dear wife this morning, and feeling a bit glum, decided on a walk up on Salisbury plain hills, to clear my head, a local popular area for strollers and dog walkers. I was surprised how many people were there out walking. I parked up the car, with the CD playing (rather loudly) and it attracted a few to start dancing! before long, i had about a dozen folk of all ages dressed in winter wear and xmas hats jiving around the car, for two records! before they all broke up, wishing all a merry Xmas. Made my day. Made me realize, how nice some people are. Its was like Gods way of putting a smile on my face. … Johnx
1 Like
Hi John.
So glad you got a little peace of goodwill in your day.
To me, that’s what Christmas should be about and not all this commercialisation and playing happy families.
Thinking of you all today and sending a hug to you too. The ones we miss would just want us to be loved, and if that has only come from this message today, then know that I mean it wholeheartedly x