I cant’ believe that it’s been 4 months since my darling Keef left me. I cry every day and don’t know what to do. I have enough money but I need him to tell me what I should do. Can anyone really understand how much it hurts? Probably too much wine but I needed to say something.
11 Likes
It is almost four months since my husband left me and I also cannot believe I will never see him again. I talk, hug and even kiss his urn every time when I pass our bedroom upstairs. My self-confidence and motivation to carry on almost vanished. I always have the feeling that no matter what I do is wrong. Please take care of yourself. You are not alone in feeling left behind and alienated. Sending lots of love and hugs.
8 Likes
4 months for me and the missing him is hard, that part gets worse every day.
Despite the people around me, I feel more alone than ever. No one’s fault, just life has given me a massive mountain to climb. I’m not back at the bottom but no matter how much I climb out, I seem to slip back down. It’s shit!
8 Likes
I’m 8 weeks today and feeling bad. hugs to all
4 Likes
Four and a half months for me and I definitely feel it’s getting worse. It’s like this horrible, lonly empty heartache is the new normal and my head is starting to realise that I have no choice but to get used to it. I just can’t see a glimmer of any kind of future I want even a bit…and all the time everyone else resumes normality…
8 Likes
I’m also four and a half months into this awful journey.
Last few weeks I have been feeling worse about everything. There is just a sadness that is always with me. Feels like it’s getting stronger. I’m back to crying at anything again.
Keep thinking maybe it’s because the reality of what’s happened is starting to hit home and I’m less in shock. That the feeling of sadness has taken over from the feeling of pain and numbness in the early days.
I do know though that feeling like this is exhausting. It’s an uphill struggle with one step forward and two steps back everyday. Just keep hoping one day the climb will get easier
8 Likes
6 months for me and my son on father’s day which is going to be very hard. My son has gone on holiday with his friend today so the first time on my own since my husband died. We would have been celebrating that we got the house to ourselves and enjoying each other company. Now I have nothing to look forward to and no proposed in life. The pain is definitely different from the early days as more prolonged as the reality of never seeing my love of my life has hit me like a ton of bricks. Miss him so much and feel so lonely without him. Life is indeed unfair and cruel. Sending you hugs xx
5 Likes
No you’re right … ive lost my direction too ! I only feel like i have got my puppy to live for 
xx
5 Likes
I know what you mean about having the house to ourselves. We used to think that if my children went away.
My partner used to work shifts. I used to quite like it when he worked a weekend. I’d plan what I was going to do then look forward to telling him my adventures when I saw him.
It also made the weekends he was off more special and we’d always try to plan something.
Now I hate weekends. They are just long and lonely. 
4 Likes
@Doughtyj yes I know what you mean… sometimes my husband was working away from Monday to Friday before COVID and I loved it because then at weekends it felt like we were dating and as the saying goes absence makes the heart fonder but now life is just shit and weekends are definitely the hardest. Xx
6 Likes
Yeh you know theyre gonna come back though dont you ? x now theyre not … 
3 Likes
Yep they are so hard … so lonely my anger is coming back again ! Im fed up that hes not here … i needed him he knew that !! He shouldve looked after himself for me !! and for the kids ! I miss him so much … xx
2 Likes
Yes it is so lonely Deb’s. And miss my husband so much I often tell my husband off for leaving me then I apologize because he is the who has lost his life. I’m sure our husbands would be with us if they could. I’m angry with the bloody cancer which is a C… Xx
6 Likes
Yes. It’s so hard knowing they will never be coming back. My partner died at work from a heart attack on a Sunday. I’d only spoken to him 30 minutes before. we’d been talking about our days and booking a holiday
6 Likes
Yeh i do that too … telll him off for leaving me ! He promised in our vows he would never leave me ! But I suppose it was " until death do us part"" it is the cancer i know ! I hate it ! Covid didnt help either - they said there would be lots of extra deaths due to that ! And our husbands were one of those statistics … sadly xx
3 Likes
Oh no that’s awful … so sorry xxx
2 Likes
Yep that’s what my husband said also death till we part. I also blame COVID because if my husband hadn’t had his COVID vaccine then he would of not passed out 2 days later at work and fell 3 meters which either cause the cancer or masked his symptoms. This happened 20 months previously. The worst thing is he was never diagnosed with cancer so didn’t stand a chance. Shit life we have now xx
6 Likes
Yep same here - took NHS from july to work out it was cancer ! Omg … !!! Up until september - oh nothing sinister they said !!! I still cant believe hes not here ! Just miss my hubby so much do you ? Xx
3 Likes
Yes I miss my hubby so very much. At the moment I just feel numb. My son has gone to Ibiza with his friend and my husband and I would of been on our own. Now just me😞Xx
Terrible debs that they took so long to diagnose your husband cancer xx
4 Likes