It’s been 2 months and I can’t see a reason to carry on my whole world has been destroyed
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We all know exactly how you feel. Nothing we can do or say will stop this pain, except to tell you that you are not alone on here, we are all feeling your pain xx
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@Dave1162 sending hugs. 5 weeks for me and life has no meaning any more. Keep chatting on here, we feel your pain. Take care
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Hi Dave1162
I’m so sorry to hear how you are feeling. Please know you are not alone, the community is here for you.
It sounds like you’re looking for support and I’m glad that you’ve been able to talk about how you’re feeling here. We know that a lot of people experience suicidal thoughts when they are grieving. We have a video about it here which you might find helpful:
https://griefguide.sueryder.org/support/suicide
There is lots of other support out there, and I would really encourage you to reach out and speak to someone about how you are feeling.
- If thoughts of suicide become overwhelming, please call 999 or contact your GP for an emergency appointment immediately.
- Samaritans are available 24/7 to talk about anything that you are worried about in confidence. You can call them on 116 123.
- Shout are contactable by text, 24/7. You can text REMEDY to 85258 and talk to them about anything.
- You can also find your local NHS urgent mental health helpline .
Sue Ryder offers an online bereavement counselling service. This is a free service and sessions are held via video chat so you can attend from home. There’s more information about this service here: sueryder.org/counselling.
You can also make an appointment with your GP and ask to be referred to counselling or other support services in your area.
You deserve care and support so please, get in touch with one of these services.
Take care, Rhi
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Hi. I hope it helps that most people on this site will know exactly how you feel. Many of us at one time or another have been desperate to join our loved ones. I think we recognise that suicide is not the answer as we would put this grief on others or possibly mess it up and feel very embarrassed and ashamed. We have to just hope that one day the pain will ease. Who knows it may be our turn to go tomorrow, but it just feels like that is not our decision to make. We all let off steam on this site without fear of being judged and it is comforting to know we are all trying to spur each other on.
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Thank you for your support i thank you all this will be my last posting xx
Can we help you in any way Dave?
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Unfortunately no one can hep me I am broken there No where for except vet to my wife
Hi Dave,
It’s hard to believe but you won’t always feel so wretched, your in shock & total despair which is perfectly normal.
All you can do is take one day at a time, try and eat at least one meal a day, sleep when you can and try and get a walk in each day.
You’ll always grief your wife but the gut wrenching despair will ease you just need to hold on until then, you can do it, if not for yourself then do it for your wife, remember her love which would want you to carry on as best as you can.
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We can help you Dave In the same way that you are actually helping us. You are giving us a reason, a purpose to our day. If I can help you carry on trying then I’ve achieved something today. Don’t give up, let’s help each other. X
I don’t know if you can help but I need something??
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Hi @Dave1162
You are not alone. Please remember that.
I completely understand the despair you feel and it is so hard to see a point to anything. But this forum is a reason. It and the people who respond, have pulled me through so many times. We’re all strangers completely lost and for now, if our only purpose is simply to help each other through the next minute then it is a good one.
Please believe, even though you feel so alone everyone here has you in their thoughts. Please keep reaching out.
Xx
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Please don’t give up on life. I recognise your feelings of complete despair, wanting to be with your loved one is the most natural thing after such a devastating loss. I can’t take away your pain as no one can take mine but you will learn to live alongside that pain, one day at a time. That’s how I get through each day & I tell myself that’s what My Derek would want & I’m doing it for him. This site helped me a lot because I realised that what I was feeling was normal & that grief is the price of great love. Our broken hearts will never mend but I’ve found that our wonderful memories together now make me smile more than cry. I talk about him all the time, he’s in my mind whatever I do & I miss him more than words can say but I’m living my life for him as well as me. I’m enjoying our grandson he never got to meet & I will tell him all about his grandad. That’s why I carry on.
Love & Strength 
xxx
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We met at 10 years old she was 61 when she passed that’s 51 years. Married for 43 years. How do I go on. I want to be with her.
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Oh wow Dave @Dave1162 . How wonderful to have shared so many years together. At the moment the pain of parting will be terrible because you loved each other so much. I only had 23 years with my partner and we only actually lived together for the last 13 months. But they were the happiest times of my life. 23 years of daily contact. But I thought we would have at least another 10- 20 years together. This was going to be the year we fulfilled all our travel plans. Knowing that others understand your nightmare and can help you through it I hope will ease your pain. There are Zoom calls as well that you can join if you think that would help you.
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@Dave1162 she will always be with you in everything you do. I know it’s hard to accept that carrying your love in your heart is enough, it isn’t really it’s something you convince yourself of in time. But try to think how she’d feel if you cut your life short to join her, I know my husband wouldn’t have wanted me to do that as much as we hated being apart. If we carry them with us then they are still alive in us, speaking their name they will never be forgotten.
Carry on for her
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@Dave1162 I feel your pain so much. I have had many days where the pain is so much that I think I will never get over it and that I’ll never stop crying. It is so unfair that we are carrying on and that they are no longer with us. I still cannot believe this has happened to me. I had to stop myself from texting him today. Just for a second, I reached for the phone and then I remembered and my heart was broken all over again. How can he be gone? He was such a huge part of my life and so alive and normal. I have lost family members and I swear the pain wasn’t like this. However, I am starting to have better days. I find I’ll have a day where I don’t cry, or only cry a little, and the other day I actually laughed out loud and felt almost normal just for a while. The next day I cried loads! You are so soon on this horrible path with us. Please come on here and rant, you are really not alone. I know it feels like nobody on earth can feel as bad as you do at the moment, but trust me, we all do and we are all here to listen xx
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@Dublingirl It’s so encouraging to see you say that you are starting to have better days. @Dave1162 You’re not alone and some people who I’ve got to know a little bit on here are taking those slow steps through their grief so don’t give up.
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xxx