Grief and work

I am new here, didnt think i would post anything but you all seem so kind and helpful.

I lost my sister over a week ago. I am devasted as it was sudden. Work only pay me for two days and then one for the funeral. I feel that going back to work is scary and i dont know if i can deal with this overwhelming feeling of loss. I am only going back to work because i dont get paid and bills still come regardless! I dont know what to do as its only early days. I do have some savings but i can’t live of them forever. Anyone else gone or going through same?

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I’m so sorry to hear about your sister, @Moonbab444. Two days isn’t long at all. Do you get paid sick leave? If so, it might be an idea to chat to your GP about being signed off.

We have a support page on going back to work which you might find helpful, too.

Take good care,

Sorry for your loss. :purple_heart:
I took 3 months off from work after my mum died, on statutory sick pay, I payed rent etc using my small amount of savings, no way could I have gone back any earlier and even when I did it wasn’t easy. I didn’t know at the time I could
, but after a while I applied for universal credit, that helped put a small amount back into my dwindling finances. I also applied for a reduction in council tax separately and ended up with the remainder being cleared. Maybe that’s something that could help.x

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Hi So sorry for your loss💔I’ve been off work since early January and feel so anxious about the thought of going back. I’m on sick leave from the doctors, have you considered this?
Take care xx

Hi @Sun
Thanks for the reply. Work have kindly said they will pay me for the week. This week I have gone back but only doing half days, so ill get paid for the hours i work as they couldn’t pay me for anymore. I will get paid for the funeral day aswel.
Can you tell me where i apply for universal credit/reduction counciltax, does it come under bereavement? I live with my partner so i think that will be taken into consideration

Hi @Pixiecat
Anxiety is normal regarding going back to work. It felt right to go back for me and try, work have been supportive.
I have considered time off again as i find it hard to concentrate or be motivated. But I just dont know what the best thing is to do, just going with it at the moment.

Hi @Seaneen
I do get paid SSP but its pittance isnt it. I will take a look at your link.
Just finding it really tiring today.
Thanks for the advice

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Thanks for replying I’ve lost all confidence and scared I’ll break down or just not cope, but I suppose I’ll never know until I try.
Wishing you well in your job, take care :heart:

If you google universal credit and use the page,you can apply for it on there.
And you have to go through your local council for their support. (Sure their contact details are on your council tax bill)
All the info you need is on the government website x

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If you break down its ok, there’s nothing wrong with that. I think its more what will people think. But people will understand you have lost someone very dear to you. If you can’t get through it then you go home. But you never know if might help…
I went back to work last week and did half days but i have found it very tiring so i haven’t gone in today and i may have the week off. Least i tried. Xx
Wishing you all the best too.

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Thanks @Sun
I live with my partner so I have no chance lol

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Hiya I’ve just had a text from my manager asking if I’m going back next Monday. I’m going to the doctors later today about the intense anxiety I’m feeling at the moment so I’ll reply then. Although I’m extremely anxious I really do want to go back to work but have decided it’ll be on reduced hours
Like you, you don’t know until you try.
I’ve noticed today thst I’ve missed messages, could you tell me how to add people into messages ?
Thank you and wish you well xx

Hello @Pixiecat, if you type an @ symbol, it will bring up a list of everyone who has posted on this thread. Then you can select the person that you would like to reply to, or to mention.

I hope this is helpful. I hope it goes okay at the doctors today too - well done for reaching out.

Thanks that’s much appreciated

Hi @Moonbab444
I saw my doctor yesterday and I’ve been signed off for another month, I’m actually relieved as the doctor actually said the words you’re not ready for work yet. It took it out of my hands, if that makes sense.
On the flip side my manager and HR are coming for a “chat” on 14th March so trying to pu that at the back of my mind
Take care, hope you have an ok day :heartpulse:

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@Pixiecat regarding work let them come and see you, maybe then they will see your not ready like your dr said. On the bigger picture you are more important than work. I know people say this all the time, but we still worry about bills etc. But it is true.
Listen to how you feel, dont push or do something thats not right for you. Hope you can have an ok day too x


Thanks @Moonbab444
That’s good advice, I’ve just had my last counselling session which my employer offered me. Im totally exhausted and so frustrated I hate being like this, it feels like it’s never going to end. I just have to believe it will. I just want to sleep till its over :sleepy:

Be kind to yourself, your doing great. Thats good your employer offers councilling, shows they care?
I do reiki and that always helps me…maybe try some meditation or listen to asmr for sound healing, it could help :smiling_face:

Hi @Moonbab444 im about to have some Reiki therapy next week and never had it before. Id be interested to know how you feel it helps - im not sure what to expect!

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