My husband died during his sleep in March 2025. He was 52 years old and had no health issues. My world has been shattered. I feel disconnected, and if it weren’t for our teenage son I’m not sure I’d be strong enough to carry on. I feel empty inside but friends and family say I’m doing well. I just wish my husband was here.
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I know how you feel. My husband died January 2025 , a massive heart attack. I didn’t get to say goodbye. I’m just existing. The physical pain in my heart is there from the minute I wake up until I sleep at night for a few hours. It’s never ending! I’m right here with you. You are not alone x
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Hello Lonely Planet, You will be strong enough to carry on. You have come to a site where we are all grieving the loss of a long term partner. I lost my darling wife of 52 years a year ago. Your friends and family are trying to help, but if they have not been through this they just cannot understand your loss. Grief is the price we seem to have to pay for love. Be kind to yourself, I am sure that your Husband looking down on you would not want you suffering. Grief comes in waves some thig just suddenly triggers it. But you should also get better times. As time passes you don’t stop loving or missing them but I do seem to be in bit better control of the grief. Come on here for a chat or even a ramble, it does make me feel better. Sending you a big hug.
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Thank you @Rob05 At first I was hesitant to join this site at but all my friends are in their 40s and 50s and (thankfully) have never experienced the death of a partner. They are kind but I feel so alone.
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@DebsA71 The suddeness of our loss is the worst bit. I keep finding ways to blame myself. I always thought we would grow old together. Now I’m 52 and missing someone who, for the past 24 years, was my everything.
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Lonely Planet, We all do this blame game, I should have insisted that she went to A&E. When she went in the ambulance I should have gone with her . I did not know. You did the best you could with the the knowledge you had at the time. Do not go there it does not help. Try and find something happy to remember like when you made him smile or he made you laugh.
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Lonely planet yes with the kind of shocking death that we’ve experienced there are feelings of guilt, what if I’d done this and the why? I’m only 54 and I can’t find a purpose to my future yet. Everything that we planned for has been wiped out. None of my friends have experienced it either so I have no one to understand the sheer devastation. But my love for my kids and my husbands kids keep me plodding on one step at a time. I miss everything about him. The grief is so exhausting.
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Hello, really sorry that you have lost your husband.
I lost Mark in January, I got up to go to work and found him in his chair, he was 58 and we had so many plans. My world and our children’s have been turned upside down, it was a complete shock, and we are still in shock. No goodbyes, it tears at my heart, I love and miss him so much, sometimes I feel like I am suffocating.
I know how you feel, I send you my love xxxx
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@Flints As long as I live, I doubt I’ll forget the moment I tried to wake him. As with you, my son and I are still in shock. Our home now feels like just another building without him. Sending you love, from someone who understands xx
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@Lonelyplanet I’m so sorry that you have lost your husband… life is so unfair and cruel. I lost my husband suddenly and unexpectedly, he was 53 years old. It turned out that he was very ill and I felt so much guilt that I didn’t notice that he had lost weight. I have had a lot of counselling due to the trauma. 2 years on I still miss my husband terribly and feel so lonely without him though I keep myself busy and go to work. It does get easier, you are only early days. Take one hour at a time and keep reaching out… big hugs xx
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@Hazel.1966 Thank you for your kind words. I friend called me tonight and said “you were a strong person before you met your husband and that part is still in you”. Honestly i wanted to scream “You don’t understand!” I know friends are being supportive but some things just prod my wounds more. I’m sorry that you also had to go through a similar loss - thank you for making me feel less alone. The warmest of hugs xx
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I know some people are very insensitive in what they say but I guess that they haven’t walk in our shoes by losing a Sprouse, soulmate. They just don’t know what to say…i soon tell them when they say I look well. I have lost a few friends but realised that they were fake friends. I still got my real friends and have met some lovely friends on this site. We are off on holiday together soon which is nice to be with people who get it.
Take care and big hugs xx
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@Hazel.1966 I also had friends that have
fallen by the wayside. Others have been amazing, but you really do find out who your real friends are. I have just turned 60 and was with my husband all of my adult life. He collapsed exactly 4 months ago today of a pulmonary embolism. We were walking down the road near our house , he suddenly couldn’t breathe and that was it. I called my 29 year old son, who made it there before he died and then had to call my other son who lives abroad. It was the most traumatic and unexpected experience. We had so many plans and now they have gone. I try to keep strong for my sons but I cannot believe this has happened to us. @Lonelyplanet people have also said that to me, that you were strong before, they just do not get it. Am do sorry that we are all in this situation xxx
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I feel as if I’m going through the motions in a life that is alien to me. It’s cruel and unfair. Everyone wants me to be “ strong” and feel better but how can I ? My heart is broken, I’m in pieces the love of my life is gone we were partners in everything. Life feels heavy I’m just a shadow. Today is a bad day……I’m so tired and exhausted.
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@DebsA71 I’m sorry today’s a bad day for you - yesterday was a bad one for me. Crying and remembering is all we can do at the moment. People on this forum say they just get through a minute, then an hour, then the day. That’s what I’m trying to do but the wave of grief can hit hard at times. I’m sending you a hug and hoping your day lightens a little xx
@DebsA71
I’m so sorry for your loss and that today is a bad day. Be kind to yourself and if you can get under the duvet and just cry if that’s what you need to do.
Mornings for some reason are the absolute worst time for me and I’m usually in pieces for a few hours…I really don’t want to wake up cause I know it’s going to happen.
We can’t stop it so have to go with it
I am nearly 10 weeks in after losing my soulmate to a bloody pulmonary embolism and it’s devastating.
We were only two n half years into our relationship after meeting late in life and even though we didn’t live together I think we would have either lived with or even married eventually. I don’t fully understand why I’m such a mess after such a short relationship as previously I was with my partner for 25+ years until he passed but I’ll be honest and say I wasn’t as upset.
John touched my soul and for that, even through all the upset, I’m grateful I had that time with him.
We always think we are here forever but it’s rammed home to me now that we are most definitely not.
I really hope your day improves.x
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Thank you. Your situation is very similar to mine. My husband and I met midlife but we knew what we had was special. We got married in December and 6 weeks later he died. I’m so so sad. I loved him so much and I know he was only in my life for 51/2 years but our relationship was like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. The world looks so different now. Thank you for your kindness x
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So sorry for your loss xx
@DebsA71
That’s so terrible for you to have the best day of your life at your wedding and then in such a short time everything changed.
Life is very cruel…death even crueler for those left behind.
I sometimes wonder what the future holds.
I know I’m probably not here for a great amount of time due to age and we only get one chance at life but it throws some bloody awful curve balls sometimes.
I hope your day is improving a little.
I’m sat watching my granddaughter’s rabbits and they are making me smile…silly little things.
So there is beauty in the world amongst our sadness…x
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@Cloudysky I’m so sorry that you lost your husband suddenly also. My husband died of a saddle pulmonary embolism and kidney cancer which we didn’t know he had. He was due for a CT scan 3 days previously but I postponed the CT scan because my husband had just started a new job and I didn’t realise it was a urgent referral. I postponed it by 3 days. He died on the day of his CT scan was due. I have never felt guilt like it and wondered if they had seen the blood clot removed it and still be here. The what’s if and why’s are the worst. I do hope that you have a lot of support from family and friends. Keep reaching out on here and take on hour at a time. Big hugs Xx
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