Keep reading all these messages and relate to them all.It all seems like a dream then suddenly you realise the truth our love ones will not be coming home ever again. I go out then have to return home to an empty house and tears swell up again. My husband died on the 3rd April it only seems like yesterday. I find it helps making sure I have something planned every day so I spend as little time as possible alone in the house by myself.I find being in the garden helps, being closer to nature, closer to God and hopefully closer to my dear husband of 40 years
I pray regularly for people mourning the lost of their loved ones.
My prayers are with you Katy
2 weeks today when Kevin left me. Gets harder every day. Althorne was in hospital from 14 February and I was here on my own itās different now. Then I knew where he was and when I would see him again. now itās just me here alone. He is in my head and heart but I cannot see him only in photos. I cry a lot.more than I thought I ever would. Was at my daughters yesterday and thought to myself I must go home soon as Kevin will be back then realised he would never be back.had to run to the bathroom as started to cry.how will I ever be fixed. He hated to see me cry but I hope he can accept that I do so because I love and miss him so much. Just hanging on to the thought he is no longer in pain anymore or suffering so much. I canāt see it ever getting easier.
Hi
I know exactly how you feel itās so hard to accept that you are not going to see your love one again. Iām just trying to keep myself busy trying new groups but itās so hard when all you want is your husband back to do the things you loved doing together.I just cry when Iām alone in my home and call out to Michael hoping can hear me. I do have faith so Iām sure I will meet up with him again in the future but the thought of living 20 years or so without him is torture. Iām only 65 and my husband had only just retired 8 months before he died . Life is so unfair. How old are you? Was it cancer your Kevin died from?
We need to be strong and support one another.
Keep positive, Katy
Hi I am 61 and kevin was 52. He was diagnosed in January with sinus cancer operated on in February and came thru that ok. Then 3 days later had respiratory arrest which put him in icu for 4 weeks .while he was in icu they found out that the respiratory arrest had caused an hypoxia episode and this mentioned he could not control his movements or speech even tho his brain was fine. He knew what was going on around him and fully understood what was said to him just could not fully converse. He made himself understood tho and still told me every day he loved me and I told him the same.the dr said he could be moved nearer home for extensive physio to help in his recovery, he was in Charing Cross hospital at the time. Sadly the cancer returned in the same place more aggressive than before and the dr said that there was nothing they could do only palliative care.they started the process to get him home but he did not make it as he got a chest infection and pneumonia. He had made his decision to only be treated for infections and nothing else as he was in so much pain and knew he was not going to get any better. The tumour was pushing on his optical nerve by the end and had also started to move upwards. While I do not like to think that he chose to leave me I have to see it from his side. He did not want to be in pain or to suffer anymore as he was so tired and I could not see him suffer any more either. He made the decision for both of us.
Hi Suekev. I so sympathise with you. My wife had progressive MND, started last April 2016. It got worse and worse as time went by. Since December this year, she was unable to talk, eat, (Had a peg tube fitted) Lost control of balance, unable to walk, breathing difficulties, went down to 6st, and with all this horrible disease, she also suffered with severe Arthritis. every day although she loved me, she demonstrated she wanted not to be here as she had lost all her dignity, And on 1st April surrounded by me and the children, her breathing gave up and stopped, and she just passed away in front of us. I am sad for myself, and now at a loss, in this now empty house. But i am somewhat pleased, she got her wish and is no more tormented by this dreadful disease. She was 63yrsā¦John.
My partner was 42 when he passed Iām 36 itās gonna be a long journey until I see him again all those years of waiting I just canāt bear thinking about it
But I will have him in my heart until we meet again
Hi Iām 51 and Iām the same, I canāt imagine years and years of this lonely life. Iām not living just existing and I donāt even know why . My whole life will now be spent counting the hours down till we meet again x
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Hi Jac. Yes existing is right. makes you wonder if its worth going on. But. as i was told, life has plans for us all. We had no knowledge or decisions when being born, and we have none when we die. Between is a life full of experiences, good ones and bad ones, ups and downs, that which we must endeavour to live through, until our natural time comes to rest.
Life has a way of pointing the way. Our lifes are not over yet, next week, next month, we may find ourselves helping somebody, caring for somebody whos ill. which will make our lives make more tolerable. Dont look to far ahead. i think theres a life plan for all eventually, just need to grieve and be patientā¦John x .
Hi John
Iāve been reading through these conversations, I sympathise with you all and relate to the emotions, feelings we are all havingbut your comments I totally agree with. We must be strong and not give up even though at times we feel like it. God has a purpose for us all and a plan. I not sure what mine is at the moment but Iām sure in time all will be revealed. Iām just trying to keep busy, trying new things at the moment. My heart is broken, the pain within hurts so much but we must go on.
As you say John take one day at a time, plan something to do each day and hopefully all will be revealed in the future.
My faith keeps me going,may God be with us all and guide us, Katy
Hi all.
Iām new to this site and have already posted a couple of messages. Iāve been reading all the messages on this Heartbroken page. To be honest the posts have made me realise that all of you caring people are going through what I am.
I lost my partner/ Soulmate on 7th May very suddenly. Iām finding it extremely difficult to come to terms with Steveās passing. Iām so heartbroken. He had just turned 58 in April. We had a lovely holiday together in Spain for my birthday in May. We came home on the 5th of may, so exited that we were going back to Spain in July to look at getting an apartment for our semi retirement. That all came to a devastating end when my beautiful Steve passed away in the early hours 7th May. I am absolutely shocked and devastated. He was my life, my love. We ran a business together. Just the 2 of us in our office. We lived and socialised together. 24/7 we were one. I canāt even get out of bed. Life is so cruel. I know you all know how Iām feeling. Thank you xxx
Hi Minnie
So sorry for the loss of your husband.
Like you, i feel totally robbed!! it took me 44 years to find my beautiful Soulmateā¦
My Steve passed away suddenly on the 7th May, just 12 years after we met.
Iām so thankful for those beautiful years, but so heartbroken we couldnāt have at least another 30. We had so many plans in place.
We ran a business together, lived and socialised together. We were one. I donāt know life outside Steve. It is truly heartbreaking take care Minnie xxx