I’m not coping with my loss even though it was in 2005
Hi Abbie,
I’m so sorry to hear that you are struggling with the long-term impact of bereavement. I see from your profile that you lost both your grandparents in a car crash, and that you are only 24 now, so you must have been a young child when this happened. It is very sad that you went through this traumatic loss at such a young age.
What sort of support did you get when your grandparents died? Loosing someone close can have long-term affects on people, and this can be especially true if someone doesn’t get enough support or the chance to talk about their feelings at the time.
It’s never too late to get some support, and I’m glad you’ve been able to take the step of writing down a little of how you feel here. Please do feel free to share more of your story whenever you feel ready, if you find that it helps. All our users here have experienced bereavement of some kind and are very supportive and understanding.
Sometimes when grief has been affecting you for a long time, it can also be helpful to speak to a counsellor to help you work through your feelings and get to a place where you feel more able to cope. If you are interested in this, we do offer a service where you can talk to a trained bereavement counsellor via video calling. Find out more: www.sueryder.org/counselling
There is also a service called The Mix, which offers telephone counselling to people aged 25 and under: https://www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team/the-mix-counselling-service
I didn’t get any support
I’m really sorry to hear that. That may well be having an impact on how you are feeling now. Please do have a think about whether some counselling might be helpful to you.
I was 9 and I answered the phone call about the accident
We knew that 3 people had died but we weren’t sure who luckily my brother survived but sadly my grandparents didn’t and the drunk driver who caused the crash also died but his 2 passengers didn’t
I remeber when we went to Mk hospital seeing one of the passengers he was missing his ear
Over the next months I stayed with relatives as mum had to go to my brother who suffered horrific burns from the accident
I’m so sorry, what a terrible experience for anyone to go through, let alone a 9-year-old.
We have a user called @Rhi3 who is 26 and has lost both grandparents, although her loss was a recent one. She has a post here if you’d be interested in talking to her: Multiple losses in 6 months. Help.
@JeanH also went through bereavement at a young age, losing her brother when she was 13 - she’s posted here: Feeling ashamed of my grief after brother’s death
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My loss this year is still so so fresh however I did lose my grandma ( grandad was buries with her last week so it’s actually brought old wounds to surface again) in 2002. Although I was only young I remember certain details so very clearly to this day. Xx