To teresad and silver fox.
Thank you for advice. Some days just feel like this as I know we all do.
Thank you againxc
Teresad I got the bus for the first time, hoping I didn’t see anyone I knew. I felt totally isolated . I went back to a couple of classes at the gym for the first time last week but both days I went in the car so I could just leave if I wanted to. Yesterday I didn’t want to see anybody so I didn’t . Today I didn’t want to go anywhere but I had organised a 13 person family meal for My husbands 70th birthday which is tomorrow. Tomorrow we should be going to Porto but of course we aren’t . I have to get my big girl pants back on and go to a funeral which really is the last place I want to go. Tuesday I will have a duvet day , take the auto pilot mask off and just be me. It is so hard for all of us isn’t it and we have to cope in the way best for us as individuals. Take care everyone xx
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Don’t have big expectations on what you ‘should’ be doing. Some days are easier than others. On the bad days just take care of yourself. If you can make a list of even just small things, like put out the bins, if you just do a few small things a day you will get there. If you really do need help then make one of those things to make contact with someone that can help. Just because some people are coping does not negate those that aren’t. We are all different and all need help in different ways. Believe at some point you will find some peace, you will smile again. And if you need some therapy or medication to get to that point then take it.
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@Poppet1973 i was having counselling at our local hospice before my husband passed away, so was my husband. My husband went in the hospice for pain management, he walked in on the Thursday and passed away the following Wednesday so he lasted 6 days. He passed away September 2023 and the shock of him deteriorating so quickly was the worst time of my life. We had been together 50 years and married almost 47 years and I love and miss him so much.
To anyone who is afraid of showing their grief by crying all the time, have a good cry whenever you feel like you need to, I have cried when I’m out for a walk, in a coffee shop, on the bus, I just haven’t been able to help myself some days.
I joined this site 5 weeks after my husband died and within a couple of days I messaged a lovely lady who by coincidence lives a 15 minute walk from me, we arranged to meet for coffee and we have become very good friends and meet every week, sometimes more and message each other every morning and evening.
Please, reach out to anyone who may also in your area and life will become a bit more bearable on this horrendous journey.
Take care all of you and much love x
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Yorklan
Thats Great. I’m glad you’ve made a friend that you can share your thoughts and feelings. And be there to help each other. I live in Sheffield and would welcome any contact from anyone near to me.
@Tenpin can I be nosey and ask which area of Sheffield you are in simply because some areas come under another council and the facilities may be better x
That would be so nice to have a froend nearby to help share each others burden of grief just difficult for so many not being close by the same areas and not everyone is comfortable as there struggling to come to terms with there loss of a soulmate love but im so happy you have found a great local close friend to help you both that is nice @Yorklan really happy for you 
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feel for you. am in same position 6 weeks after sudden death of husband.he too had business and its been a nightmare on top if all the other official stuff
@Martin64 I was in a terrible state and so was my friend but we can tell each other anything because we know we both ‘get it’ because you have to have lost your soulmate to understand what it’s like, I’m sure you’ll agree x
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To yorklan
I’m in Sheffield not far from the centre. My area is called arbourthorne.xx
@ Tenpin thank you for replying with that. Do St. Luke’s hospice offer any counselling or even your GP may be able to steer you in the right direction for some help x I’m always here if I can help in anyway x
@Tenpin ive just Googled St. Luke’s and they do offer bereavement support maybe it would be worth a phone call. X
Thank you. I will try in the morning.xx
@Tenpin good you are on the road to healing making that first step. Please don’t struggle alone we are all here for each other x
To yorklan
I already tried our doctors. They wasn’t very forthcoming. Was happy to dish out tablets but a pharmacy can do that. I tried a couple of other places which unfortunately have long waiting lists. When you’re feeling like this I d believe there should be more out there and easier to access.
Thank you again. So anyone in or around Sheffield call me a heads up please. Xx
@Tenpin let me know how you get on in the morning. We have a wonderful hospice in Rotherham. x
I will do love.
Thank you again. Xx
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Is anyone else having a really bad day? I’m rock bottom, and it’s only midday. X
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My day feels quite heavy today too! Sending love xx
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Isn’t it so awful J D, there’s no manual to prepare us for this heartbreaking situation we’re all in. Sending love to you also. X X
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