@Pat7 &@ Caroline2
I had known my husband for 34 years but I don’t think it matters how long you have known someone if you are insync with them you give your whole self to them body and soul.You are like one person in some ways,you know what they’re thinking before they say it,laugh at the same things,are comfortable just being quiet together.As you can see from the people posting on here there is no right or wrong way to grieve for loss and I’ve found I am stronger in a lot of ways than I thought I was.I think I will have a lot of days when I feel like giving up but I take each day as it comes and that’s all you can do.
If people offer you comfort and will listen to you if you feel the need,take them up on their offer.A lot of people won’t talk about your loved one because they think they will upset you, but they couldn’t hurt you anymore than not acknowledging that they existed,because your soulmate will be with you forever. x
Hello …im am 13 months without David …not posted for a while …i cant say it has got any easier…i have tried to use various coping strategies…eg …keeping busy …being with family and friends…thing is i miss him so much…feeling anxious is my enemy it never gives in …and along side the loneliness ,sadness and all the other shit that comes with it ,i really dont know what to do !!! Nothing can change what has happened and i find that so hard to accept…i just want him to walk through the door …sending everyone feeling this awful pain ,love and strength…x x
@Scrappydave ,
I’m always amazed at how quickly some people can pick up the strands of their life and carry on in a matter of months.I too miss my husband every day,I’m told that Kevin wouldn’t want me to be unhappy but how can I be anything else.I still retain my sense of humour,but I find no joy in going places because he should be with me.I find it difficult to listen to music and I don’t think I’ve had a little sing like I used to which we used to laugh about.x
Hi @Scrappydave I am like you I just want my husband to walk back through the door. Unfortunately, I know that will never happen. I am so bereft. Although bereft is not strong enought to describe the way I feel. I said in another thread that there isn’t a word in any dictionary that can describe how I feel after losing the love of my life. Like you say @Sweetie I also find it hard to understand how some people can move forward with their lives so soon after losing their partner. I suppose it takes all kinds and we’re not all the same. I used to have a really good sense of humour but that seems to have eluded me. Whether it will return I don’t know as I don’t have my partner in crime now. I send you both love.X
I feel terrible at the moment. I can’t live without him. I just can’t!
Hey Jean you want to talk?
I feel like you did last night. I just can’t seem to stop crying. It’s unbearable isn’t it? Xx.
Yes it is, so many ups & downs, so wish there was a fast forward button to a point where it was made easier like some say!!
I miss him so much I can’t bare it. How have you been today?
The burden were bear for such a strong love!! Mornings I never get on with but have tried to go out with my mother today, had a coffee sitting in the car & chatting, my usual sob at was has happened but better than I was last night. You been out today?
Yes. It’s my daughter’s birthday tomorrow so we had a family gathering at hers. I’ve been fine today but evenings are always worse for me. When the pain hits it’s agonising.
Oh bless her, bet that was hard for you both. It’s strange because the mornings have always been the worst for me, the waking up of another day without her & the nights (never come home until late mins since shes gone) but I seemed to have a calm, wondered if it was her doing it to me but the last few nights hasn’t been the same, I’m more on edge & restless it’s odd. Yes although she’s always there in my mind, sometimes it’s like a movie & she’s going to come back & all be a dream or something but the other times when the realisation hits home again it is agonising!!
It was a nice evening at my daughter’s. My son and other daughter were there also with their partners. I have a big extremely supportive family but I still come home to and empty house and it’s so hard. They always tell me to ring them any time of day or night but they all have jobs and children to get off to school so I don’t like to disturb them late at night. I didn’t sleep very well last night either and tiredness makes things 100 time worse. Did you enjoy your jaunt out with your mum?
I’m glad you had a nice evening, nice to have a big family. That’s the thing with a partner though, they are the ones you go home to and share everything with & why it’s so hard for us to re-adjust. Yes, only took her to a few shops (I usually stay in the car as I don’t like being in to many places at the moment) & then had a quiet coffee in the car & went back to hers for supper. She’s made sure I’ve eaten every day since because I’ve had no real appetite so don’t think I’d have bothered or thought about it but she’s keeping me in check bless her.
Oh bless her. She must worry about you. Both my parents are gone but my kids and grandkids are fantastic. Without them I would have followed my husband. They’ve kept me going. I’ve calmed down a bit now @Emz so I’m going to try to sleep. Thank you so much for chatting to me. It helps so much knowing others know exactly how you’re feeling. Bless you. I hope you manage to get some sleep. Message me any time x.
Yes I do hope you have a better sleep tonight!! Always here for you xx Take care & rest well 
I’m with you all the way on this. It erodes your confidence to even discuss it with anyone. 5 years on, I won’t have anyone in the house now. I go out to meetings and keep everyone at a distance. I do crafts, watch tv, listen to audiobooks, look after myself and just get by. Thats life now, quite different but I’m old now so I’m at peace.
Good morning all. I hope you are feeling stable this morning and managed to get some sleep last night. It’s very icy here. These are the sort of days that David and I loved, when we could stay in the house all cosy. In the evenings if the weather was bad he used to say it was time to ‘batten down the hatches’ and get cosy with our 4 cats. Big cuddle to you all.
Just sending more love and strength to everyone here going through this awful awful…Thing …thats the word i use to discribe it sometimes…heartbreaking posts …dark days are so hard to pull through…once again love to all xxxxxx
Morning @Jean8 @Scrappydave Yes Jean I remember those days too, I would close the curtains and say let’s shut the world out, it was such a wonderful feeling, now a frightening one! I’ve decided to have a day in today, to have a good house clean which is needed; this will be my second on my own since she’s gone & I can’t bring myself to leave the sofa at the moment which has been my bed since she’s gone. I don’t feel comfortable in my own home anymore because it was ours, I don’t want it to be just mine, to be here by myself. I so hate this new existence!!