How many tears can one person cry

Cry cry cry that’s what I do. Music, shopping walking the dog. Don’t know how much more I can take.

Hi Stevie wee oh i know im 10 months down the grief road,lost hubby March this year he was 59,i seem to have better days and worse days ,cannot say good,me too,today ,walked the dog,listened to music,some reading,i havent cried today,but felt on the verge ,sometimes i think im all cried out ,then off i go again,i just keep on ,keeping on so to speak,theres no map to show us where to go on the grief journey,its all new,wish i had the magic words to help,we all on here understand the pain you are feeling,sadly its the sorrow that connects us all.Hoping you have some better days Stevie,hugs x

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Sometimes I’m all cried out to. Just can’t see a future anymore. Not just see a future but not want a future. It the helplessness of the whole thing. Thank you x

Sometimes I’m all cried out to. Just can’t see a future anymore. Not just see a future but not want a future. It the helplessness of the whole thing. Thank you x

Tears are words the heart cannot express. Let them fall. I promise you they won’t go on forever but they’ll never be far away…


Hello Stevie ~ I can feel your despair, I think you just get worn out with all the crying, its exhausting and yet you can’t stop it. I wanted to reach out to you and let you know you are not alone in your grief. I know you can’t see it at the moment, but the tears will help get the deep sadness out rather than keeping it all inside. Thinking of you…Elaine

I know how you feel Stevie about the future. It doesn’t matter if you cry but try to think that your wife wouldn’t want you to give up on a future. It will feel so bad for a long time as everybody on here knows but the pain will ease a bit and the crying will not be so anguished. Keep strong for her sake. Hugs x

I try so hard. But I don’t think I can do it. I can’t see a future only a past that’s been wiped out. What’s the point. I sat with my little dog in front of the telly and thought is this really it for 20 years. Nah not for me I’m not strong enough x


Someone put this quote on another thread and it’s stuck with me:

‘You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have…’

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I feel the same mate. I too have been sitting watching tv with my little dog thinking is this it for me now. 5 months on Sunday for me and still devastated can’t take much more of this.

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Hi William I did the same yesterday. And thought the same. I this it. Get a hobby they say. Join a group. But what can we do. I’ve been through every thing in my mind suicide not really an option if I want to see her again. And what about my kids her kids. Our grandchildren, could I leave that as a legacy. Not really, so the alternative is to be like a walking dead just existing to keep family happy that I’m not dead. I don’t know how to do this, as at the end of the day I’m alone.

Hi Stevie Wee, just to say I feel so much like you. I hate everyday without my Ian. I’m 59 and can’t bear the thought of another 20 or so years without him. I try my hardest but its so bloody hard, I’m filled with such sadness and grief. I carry on for my children and grandchildren and shall do all the usual Christmas things for them but all my joy and happiness died with Ian. Oh well yet another weekend, dread it as we all seem to here.
Love Julie x

I know it’s so dreadfully painful I love my grandkids so much but I get sad being with them because nanas not there. You know at 54 she had so much more love to give and receive so yes a other dark and lonely weekend ahead. Take care xxx

I’m pretty much the same, in that I have very little interest or enthusiasm for doing anything. I miss my wife all the time and I miss the life we had. I try not to think too far into the future as it’s much too difficult to predict and it wouldn’t necessarily pan out as I imagined anyway. One thing that does grab my interest and enthusiasm is the thought of watching my grandchildren grow up, and even watching my own kids as they develop and grow. I see so much of my wife in all of them and that is a source of comfort.
I’m a bit concerned that I seem to have lost the ability to cry and now just sob as my eyes fill with tears. If I’m talking about my wife my throat constricts, my eyes prick with tears and I have to wait to complete what I was going to say until I become more composed.
I don’t feel overly concerned about any of this as I feel it’s just a fairly normal process and I’ve noticed that my grief is softening a little. I don’t expect it to go away. I don’t want it to. It will be part of whoever I become.

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I’m exactly the same. I think sometimes I’m all cried out but later I cry for England. I love my grandkids more than anything but being around them makes me feel so sad that she’s not here

That’s just how I feel when I’m with my grandkids. They were so important to her, and her to them. I find it so sad that she can’t be with them and it’s probably one of the hardest things to deal with. Whenever she went shopping she bought for them and I keep finding bags of things she had bought and put away fot them. The trouble is I don’t know what article is for which child and that’s a bit upsetting.

My wife was the same always buying for the grandkids. I know she would want me to carry on where she left off. Just need the courage to do it without her. Of course I will ask her advice always

It’s nearly 5 months for me too and I do the same - sitting watching rubbish TV stroking my little cat on my lap and thinking what’s the point. I keep telling myself I can’t end it because of my son who lives with me but then he would be better off because he could sell the house and not have to worry about being hard up and having an old mother who cries all the time.

I totally get the loneliness and the suicidal thoughts I have been to dark places but like you I could not do that to my kids. I have one granddaughter who was born 5weeks after Margaret died and the sadness that she never met her is soul destroying. As you say we have to carry on for the kids sake but it is so hard. The stomach churning feeling is there 24/7 I don’t know if it will ever ease.
Take care William

Hi Stevie you are strong,we are all stronger than we know on this site and others currently experiencing grief at this moment,we are like a band of grief warriors fighting for survival,but we are all connected by the love we feel for our loved ones and the pain we all feel,we are all part of something,even if we wish not to be,i never look further than each day,i never torture myself thinking about a future,it arrives when it arrives without me dwelling on it,so that way i can live more calmer each day,your lovely wife would want you to keep going Stevie,i know my hubby would,i keep talking to him and tell him i hope im doing you proud each day,life is bloody hard work,but i dont think it was ever meant to be anything else.So please keep going and you will find your grief changing,as time moves along,into something less devastating as you are feeling now x