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N
Good night all
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Hi brummy
I hope you are ok,and managed today.
Take care
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Have a good night everyone 
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That is exactly how i feel.I have to put on my “mask”when i go to workand when i go shopping,its all so painful and heartbreaking.Take care.
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Nightwish1
Im a bit bruised but other than that im ok.i didnt have a good night, very restless, my foot and leg were aching.We have to hold on to anything that helps bring us comfort even if that brings tears too.I try to remember happier times but then the tears come, its all so hard but all we can do is try our best and take things step by step.Take care.
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I pray to God too every night that i want him to take me to my dear wife but im still here.He must have reason to leave me here?With the help of God and the kind understanding support of people on here we have somehow “survived “ these days ,weeks and months.Its been so hard and painful and still is , heartbreakingly sad.i know i will never, ever be the same again.It feels as though part of me passed with my dear wife.Take care.
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Cathymb,
I am so grateful for this site and the kind , caring, understanding people on here who all know what we are going through, its not just words on a keyboard we all do genuinly understand how we all feel, we have all been there whether in early stages of grief or years on , we are still going through the pain and heartbreak of losing our dear loved ones.We are all different as human beings and all have different waves of coping with our loss.some of us can try and come to terms better than others, but i dont think we ever really come to terms with losing our dear loved ones, we just try and “adjust” to a new chapter in our life on this earth, a very different chapter, a hard and difficult chapter.It really is hard, im one of those people who is very quiet and find things really difficult.I went back to work after about 5 weeks and the human contact helped a bit but coming back to the empty house is so painful and every day i cry, the emptyness, loneliness wwheras there was once happiness, love and joy.Many people offer words of sympathy but unless they have experienced what we have no one really knows how it feels.The deeper the love, the harder the grief i often think.Look after yourself,always reach out to us on here,we really do know how you feel.Take care.
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Nightwish1
Thank you for thinking of me.Its been another hard day.i did a bit in the garden but it was very cold.came in and burst into tears.I will sure be glad to see the back of this year as so many of us on here will.It cant be any worse for us.Take care.
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Everything you say is so true @brummy.
My son who was 40 last July is really, really struggling over losing his dad, he’s just on his way home on the bus from being out with some of his his old school mates, says going back to work tomorrow will do him a favour. He has a partner with adult children but none of his own. But he has nieces and nephews and we have all been away together for Christmas. All feels so strange now and flat. My youngest daughter who is a single parent with 2 of my grandchildren is still staying with me until next month. I am not sure how I will be then though.
Take care 
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Brummy,
I’m not looking forward to the new year. The thought of starting a new year without my lass fills me full of dread.
Take care
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I’m struggling tonight. Very teary. 4 weeks have passed and still 9 days until my beloved husband’s funeral. I don’t know how I’m going to live without him 
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I’m sending you love 
x
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Hello Cathymb
I’m struggling, too. Have done all day. Sunday is a day when everyone is with their family. I have been alone all day. I’m similar to you. Nearly 6 weeks have passed. I have buried some of Mark’s ashes and put flowers on the spot, but I haven’t written the epitaph for his stone yet. We are holding a Celebration of Life for him on 19th Jan, but I’m finding it hard to celebrate his life as I’m still grieving over his death. I can only think of all the things I am missing, but need to focus on all the good things he brought to my life and all the things we shared. He was my second chance at love after the separation and divorce from my husband. I don’t know either how I am going to live without him. I know I have got to make a new and different life, but I don’t know how yet. I don’t think the Celebration of Life will bring closure, but I’m doing it for all the other people who loved him. We don’t all know each other, but we all have stories to tell about how lovey he was. Wishing you courage and sending you love.
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Night night everyone.
I hope you get some sleep x
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Hello Marissa. So tough isn’t it? This was my second marriage too after divorce. I’m also trying to be happy for all the times we had together but then inside I’m screaming about what we’ll miss. Bless you 
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Thank you. Try & have a beautiful day.
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Morning John and everyone, hoping for a good day for you all
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