I am sorry, its awful for you. I don’t want to put our daughter in the middle so I Chatgbt last night. It said don’t bring it up, don’t push the subject, show that your coping and independent. It sounds like your doing just that.
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Hi Helen, it’s such a shame I really feel for you especially now you would think she could be a little more sensitive.
Families can have a habit of splitting over such stupidly unimportant things. I’ve got three sisters and a brother l’m the youngest and I remember when we were teenagers we thought we would all live together in some sort of commune but now I only speak my closest two sisters in age. When my wife died I sent my elder brother and sister a message on WhatsApp all I got back was a sorry message back until today nothing else. It seems such a shame, I not saying I’m not also to blame I have lived abroad for forty years etc but I would have thought in moments like this you expect a little more from your own family. Sorry for rambling on.
I really hope you see some change of heart and things improve
Wishing you all the best and lots of hugs
Tom 
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Hi LJ.G so sorry about your situation too not seeing your grandchildren is terrible. I really hope your daughter in-law sees sense. Wishing you all the best and lots of hugs
Tom
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My lovely husband always organised something for the Easter weekend, picnic or travel or something. I’ve been watching pics of the wonderful times we spent over Easter in recent years crying my eyes out and missing him so much. I feel like I am half a person now, since a big chunk of me was yanked out the day he died -
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I understand stand how you both feel. My eldest son is estranged from me, and the rest of my immediate family. It’s a long story and complicated. I reach out to my son when it was his birthday last April. We were meeting up for a coffee about once a month after my husband died . The conversation was difficult, we were steadily making progress. Then soddenly after Christmas he stopped answering any messages I’ve sent him . I have managed to have a good relationship with his eldest daughter. She is 21 and is in her final year at university. My other son and daughter in law have been great and so supportive. You couldn’t get 2 sons more different. Family’s ech , some times when your going through things life this you think it only happing to you .
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We also used to do something over Easter, this is the first Easter without him. It’s so different. I understand how you’re feeling. 
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I know I keep saying it but it’s a nightmare. I’m sorry we are all in this awful situation x
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You are so right it is awful. Today I have not been great. I was ok until late morning then since then I just keep breaking down in tears. Unsure if it’s the fact I haven’t gone out and it’s the start of yet another holiday weekend where families do things together. My hubby and I didn’t have children it was just the two of us against the world.
I’ve only spoken to one person today and that was first thing this morning since then no one as checked in, yes I know I can contact someone but I just don’t want to drag them down as I think people that don’t understand grief just don’t get why I’m still low, after 56 weeks they think I should be better now. They don’t get you don’t get better it’s not an illness that you recover from 
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Hi Heartbroken, sorry about your day. It’s difficult when you don’t live with anyone. I have never felt so lonely. My wife filled up the house with life and now I only speak to people on the phone or neighbours for a quick passing word. Many days can go by with talking to anyone.
Wishing you all the best
Tom
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I am so sorry you’re going through this on top of everything else. I just don’t understand why 
I’ve never upset my daughter in law, but she just cut ties for no apparent reason. I know she’s very controlling so I didn’t want my son’s life to suffer, so I had to let it be. It has been very tough heartbreaking. My other two sons are so caring and loving, they don’t understand either, they miss their brother. In future I pray something will change but who knows. Like you say families eh. Please look after yourself and try to have a restful evening. Sending love 
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Thank you you’re right it’s hard , it’s been difficult. Never thought this would happen in my family. And as a mum you don’t stop loving your children. I hope in time things will work out . My son has been round this afternoon. It’s been nice to have to have someone to chat to . In the last few days I have sorted my mobile out , and the house insurance out . The house insurance my husband would have done , he would have helped with my mobile. So I feel like I have achieved something. Hope a peaceful evening.
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Dear Heartbroken
I’m sorry your feeling it too. There are better days to come I’m sure. I contacted an old friend who popped up on Facebook a few weeks ago (I’d not seen in over 10 years) she came for lunch this week and we had a lovely afternoon. We cried, we laughed and we hugged, it was as if I’d seen her last week. She’s coming again soon and has invited to France later in the year to visit another old friend who said she’d love me to come.
We just have to be brave, I know my husband would want me to live the best life I can x
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Goodnight John, hope you have a nice evening x
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Sorry you’re having a rough day, although I do have children and grandchildren. They can’t be with you all the time . I spend a lot of time on my own with my dog for company. This is the first Easter without my husband , and it’s the strangest feeling. I hope you have a peaceful evening
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It’s hard this path we are on but we have to get through it.
Sending you a virtual like you I do walk but it’s not the same on your own but it beats being stuck inside these lonely four walls.
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Night night everyone.
I hope you get some sleep x
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Thank you Tom. I had the same, sorry for your loss from my younger sister and a message from my sister in law saying do I want them to come to the funeral! We’d not spoken in over 10 years. It’s not them that hurts, it’s the people you think will be there. The friends that just disappear. It’s time to make new ones x
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So sorry to hear so many of you are having problems with family members. I don’t have this problem, I’ve no really close family left, we weren’t blessed with children, Rachel’s asthma went mad before we started trying for a family. We asked her consultant about it once his reply was “some people with asthma similar to yours, it makes their asthma better, some it makes no change and some it makes it worse. If yours got any worse I don’t know what we’d do!” So basically it’s too dangerous to risk it. My sister and her husband didn’t have children either. My sister passed away 12years ago at 52 from a very rare form of uterine cancer. I haven’t seen her husband since her funeral (not that I’m bothered) after he told Rachel to ‘f***ing shut up in church when she was reading the eulogy. My sister had asked her to do the eulogy, he insisted she’d asked him! He agreed in the end for her to do up to the day him & my sister met, which is what she did plus a few bits during her illness that happened when he wasn’t there (which was most of the time! As my sister had moved in with Mum, she couldn’t manage her stairs. He turned up about twice a week, still went to work & to football!) My Dad had passed away the year before aged 77, from a chest infection, he’d had a stroke just after he retired. Ten months after my sister passed away Mum had a massive stroke, she was in hospital for 3 months and for most of it she wasn’t expected to be able to go home as she had no swallow reflex so was having to be tube fed. She did eventually get some swallow back so was able to come home, she still couldn’t speak when she came home. She recovered enough to be able to be completely self caring, we took over paying her bills, doing shopping etc. The only thing Mum wasn’t able to do was her cleaning as she could use the vacuum cleaner or mop safely, so she had a cleaner for 1hour a week. Mum came away in the caravan with us & when we went on a cruise Mum went to a hotel in Llandudno for 2weeks, it specialised in being for people needing mobility aids, level access showers & even had a care agency they worked with if guests needed it. She had a fantastic time there, riding up & down the seafront etc and was planning to go the again, sadly they went bust during Covid, I think. When Rachel passed away I know Mum felt guilty still being alive, she’d buried two of her children (my brother died aged just 5, before I was born) and then Rachel passed away just 4days after turning 50, Mum never actually said it but from things she did say it was obvious. Mum passed away 51weeks almost to the minute after Rachel & 4days after her 88th birthday. So my closest relatives now are Rachel’s parents, brother & his family and my Mum’s brother & his family, All of them I’m on good terms with, I don’t hear from Mum’s brother much but his wife has dementia so that keeps him fairly busy. I’ve always been on good terms with Rachel’s parents, before my Dad had his stroke it wasn’t unusual for the six (us & both sets of parents) to go on holiday together for a week. My in-laws probably see me more than their own son as we don’t live far from one another, if I’m going shopping I’ll often call them to see if they need anything and in the chemist we always check whether there’s a prescription ready for one another. We often go to the theatre together too. Neither of them are in good health, my MIL went into hospital for her pace maker to be changed and suffered lots of complications following the surgery, resulting in further surgery, when unfortunately her right lung was damaged she now has reduced capacity. She now has oxygen at home and to take out with her and gets breathless very easily & gets nasty coughing fits. My FIL tripped in the garden and should have gone to A&E when he finally went he’d broken a toe & torn ligaments in his foot. He now has a fallen arch on that foot, he was having pains down his leg which was diagnosed as sciatica but they now found he’s got very similar spinal problems to me with prolapsed discs in the lumbar area. I cooked Christmas dinner at their’s for 4 of us myself, my in-laws and a good family friend, I usually cook Christmas dinner for us, this year I found it awful, there was nothing wrong with the dinner, it was that we were only 4. The year before there was 5 of us (the 4 of us & my Mum) and the Christmas before that 6 as Rachel was there. All I kept having go through my head was which of us won’t be here next time, I kept trying to get rid of it but it just kept coming back! My problem starts with history one year we lost my Dad, the next my sister and the following Rachel’s Grandad, so my mind just kept on 1year ago Rachel was missing, now this year my Mum, who’ll be missing next Christmas! I just kept trying to put a brave face on it & not letting on what I was thinking, no matter how hard I tried it kept surfacing.
Sorry I’ve been rambling on again, it comes from 17 years as a milkman often being the only person some people saw regularly! Many of the customer on my round had known me since I was a baby, I didn’t used to tell them that, but they usually found out eventually! They moved the areas we covered slightly once, one old lady when I collected her money, I didn’t let on who I was, it took about 5minutes, the next time she’d found out who I was it took me 45minutes that week & I got told off for not saying who I was the first time! I rambling again!! Hope everyone had an ok day today. Night, night.
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I’m on the south coast @Helen39 in Saltdean just outside Brighton
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It is a nightmare. I still can’t believe this has happened. He can’t have died. This can’t be true, this awful endless pain and grief
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