It’s awful, unbelievable I know. When the shock and fog lift the realisation is just too scary. Everyone here understands what your going through.
The only thing that gets me through the days is keeping busy. I can’t allow myself to think. Most nights I have a brandy, a herbal sleeping tablet and my warm neck wrap. If I’m shattered I can get off to sleep, if I wake I watch Downton abbey (I’ve watched it many times now) or listen to boring history on YouTube. I have the volume really low so I have to concentrate to hear it. Days like yesterday when I spent most of it in tears, I don’t sleep.
We muddle through doing the best we can. It’s all we can do x
Easter was a special time for many of us, now its like so many other parts of the year, sadness, loneliness and emptyness.The memories i try to recall but they usually bring tears as it reminds of what i once had but have now lost.Half of me went with my dear wife, what is left is just complete heartbreak knowing my life and myself have changed forever.
What have I done? I’ve agreed to go with my sister to her daughter’s to dog sit for a week next week. She doesn’t want to go alone, the house is enormous and rural, an old nursing home. Two trains and a tube, goodness knows how I’ll cope. My sister’s lovely but the most dippy person in the world.
I’ve not been anywhere without Stephen in 50 years. I know I’m trying to be brave and push myself but this time I’ve gone too far.
not a good start as normal, hardly any sleep, sadness and crying and its not 6 am yet, what is in store for today, well it cant get worse but then I realize it can, going for a walk before 7 see if I can manage that without getting upset usually on the way back to a empty house,
Going back home is awful, I’m sure most of us feel the same. Walking down the drive always gets me going too. It’s facing the fact they are not there, again. I talk to Stephen, walk in the door and say I’m back. I’m sorry I don’t have any tips on how to cope with it.
Enjoy your walk, it’s quite pleasant out. I’ve been in the garden x
You will be fine , I often catch trains when I met my friend. The trains have information boards which tell you what the next stop is . You can get an app for your phone, if you put in your journey. It will tell you the which train station to change trains and the platform number and time of the next train. I don’t know much about the tubes , you might even enjoy the company of the dog . Good Luck
It’s quite bright out there this morning. I’ve nothing much planned for today, just supermarket shopping. and walking my dog. Get through your day the best you can to any one who needs it . @Mitzi1 How’s the kitchen and did you get the oven working.
Dear sherbet I’ve cancelled. If it causes me this much anxiety and even less sleep I’m not doing it. Think I’ll take smaller steps. Thank you for replying though x
hugs to you
to any one who needs it . 